i have 2 girlfriend What do i do????

United States
November 17, 2009 8:18pm CST
im in a little dilema and i dont know what to do. i have 2 girlfriends the frist one i ben whit her for 6 years i have a 2 year old boy and i really love, him but i just dont feel the same about her mom. every time we go out there is drama because she is really jealous i cant even say hi to my friends nomore. I tride to breake up whit her but she tell me if i leave he she will take my kid some were to mexico were i will never see him and i dont what that. my othere girfriend i be whit her for 2 years and she knows that i have a baby and she is ok whit that and she knows that i still live whit my baby mama but we want to move in whit eache other whit out losing my kid what do i do???????
3 people like this
25 responses
@lheimhar (23)
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
oooh thats very hard situation! u know what im feeling sory for ur 2nd gf coz as a girl its very hard to love someone had a family. but i dont think u can call that a family coz theres no love for the 1st girl, is she knows about ur 2nd gf? my god i dont know what good advise i can give u.
• China
18 Nov 09
The best advice is finding one in them who you love more,and abandon another.
@jennybianca (12915)
• Australia
19 Nov 09
What country doyou live in and what are the laws regarding access to youir child? That is the real issue you need to look at. Most countries allow both parents some access to their kids. You need to be quite sure that you dont love the childs mother, & do you love your second girlfriend, before you move in with her. Either way, there is no point in staying a relationship where the coule dont love each other.
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
Oh that is hard... So you wanted to leave the mother of your son... Why is that? Is it because of her jealousy? Where do you think that jealousy coming from? Have you ever make her feel secured in anyways? Like you said, you have "another" girl and I am sure even if your are hiding that from her, she knows and feels that. That is woman's instict... Well if she decided to do that to you once you leave her... she is the mother and she has the right for the custody, more so because you are not married... Well time heals all wounds. If you don't love her anymore and there is none a bit feeling left, better talk to her heart to heart and tell her that your realtionship is not going anywhere. Relationship should not be one sided... That is not fair for you and NOT FAIR FOR HER TOO!
@sid556 (31005)
• United States
18 Nov 09
You have to man up and do what is right by your girlfriends and yourself as well. This is not fair to anyone. The girl you are living with deserves to know the truth and move on with her life & possibly meet someone whom she can have a meaningful relationship with. I understand that you are concerned about losing your child. You won't. You need to go to court and file a paper for visitation rights and ask that the judge prevent her from leaving the state with your child.
@etioewe (143)
• Mexico
18 Nov 09
Man thats a tough task you into . try and look for solution to this issue because you might think all is well with the second girl who is ok with going in with you with out problem but when you now start living together thats when you will start seen problems coming from all angle , about the child I suggest you leav the child with the mother and play your part by providing for the childĀ“s education or any neccesary need. well thats my opinion there are other things you need to consider too i guess you will get it from others advise.
@laydee (12814)
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
I think you should start by earning more so that you could have custody over your kid. Try to see your options on how to be able to keep your kid in the event that you decide to leave your kid's mom. Further, have you talked to her about her attitude problem? Perhaps if you could settle things with her instead of looking for someone new, it'll be less complicated. Girls are usually jealous because they're scared to accept the fact that the man they love doesn't love them the same anymore. I tell you if you could be with her for 6 years, there's no reason why you two could not rekindle the 'love'. Further, as for your girlfriend who knows you have a kid and are living with the mom, I don't think it's a good idea to start living with her after just 2years of shared relationship (shared because she knows there's 2 of them in your life). I mean, you somehow made a mistake of staying with someone for 6years, how sure are you that you are ready for a new flame? I definitely would tell you to 'keep your act together', and focus on what you really want. If you really want your kid, you'd do everything you can to earn more and stop prioritizing too much on relationships right now.
• United States
18 Nov 09
Wow, I cant imagine the situation you are in. Personally I would do what ever made me happy. so if your baby momma doesnt make you happy you shouldnt settle for it. Go to court to get 50-50 custody. She cant completely take your son away from you just because you dont want to be with her.
• China
18 Nov 09
i don't like disloyalty on emotion. If i were you, i will be sorry for both of them.
• India
18 Nov 09
great man enjoy life its good to manage 2 girlfriend great enjoy both yaar dont worry about it.
@ebuscat (5949)
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
For me better for you to go with your first because your heart will not be divided because you want more with your child but if you8 chose to your second then you don't have kid and your not in love more it is not good.
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
Choose the best girl for you. You can't love them at the same time. Don't create to much responsibility. If you already have kids, stick with your first woman. It'll create another responsibility if want to have another kid with your second women. You can't take the kids with you. It's against the law.
@hisoka147 (606)
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
I'm having some trouble trying to make out what you are trying to say. However, I'll try to answer to the best possible as I can based on my own understanding from what you have written here. I think the best thing that you can do here is to choose between those two girl friends of yours whom you really love. You have to realized that you can not have two wife or you will only get your self into a lot of trouble financially.
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
aww.. that's a very complicated situation. i feel sorry for the other girl. i'm sure, it hurts like hell for her. but love is really powerful. despite of pain, she chose to stay with you. i think if you really love your child, you'll sacrifice. better leave the other girl. do it for your child, your family and for that girl. it would be better for her if you'll stop seeing her. give her freedom, don't stuck her in such relationship.
@ybong007 (6659)
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
I think you have a right to see your son. If you no longer feel the same with first girlfriend then why spend your life miserably with her, I'm sure that girlfriend of yours don't want to feel miserable too. You can talk to her or you can consult a lawyer for your rights. Cheers!
@rg0205 (2638)
• Hong Kong
18 Nov 09
Man up. Be responsible. What you're doing is very irresponsible. If you don't love your girlfriend who is the mother of your child, you could've ended the relationship with her. You could also call social services about her threatening to take your child if you ended your relationship. I don't know which agency in the US can help you out with that, but here in HK, you can alert the social services or child welfare and express your concern about the matter. And why do you still live with your girlfriend who you do not love? Can't you afford to get a place of your own? Move out then.
@SouravRC (248)
• India
18 Nov 09
Very bad. Your situation is absolutely ridiculous. Don't waste time in myLot (lol), it won't solve any problem. Knock the door of some good lawyers. Lesten what they have to say about this messed up matter. Don't get me wrong, I may sound harsh but mylotters cannot help you on this, whatever they say. It's far more complicated than that. You need the help of law. Think about it. Good luck!
@mcongy (47)
• China
18 Nov 09
i grew up in a family where my parents divorced.you know my feeling when i saw other families were together?yep,i was so sorrowful.but what could i do?my father and mother have their own families.sometimes i can stay with one of both.but it doesnt feel like you were at your own home. i am not married yet so i dont know how to deal with this kind of matter.but i really hope you can take the matter seriously first and then make decisions in the long term.must be sure to consider more about your son and his future,if you really love him!
@mains50 (299)
• Canada
18 Nov 09
Try telling the truth to your first wife that you have another girlfriend who is more cooperative, and more understanding. If you tell her the secrete now you can sort it out with her if you dont and she finds out later say good-bye to your child.
@oasis_9 (833)
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
Try and talk with your son's mother that you both should go your separate ways because it wont work out anymore. But you still love your son deeply so she shouldn't take away your little bot because you also as the father have rights with him. But try to be civil while discussing this to her, I'm sure with the right words and proper conversation she will understand and will let you go.
@rdsantos (320)
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
your still lucky because your first girlfriend didn't took away your kids knowing that you have another girl. if the two are not yet married you don't have a choice if the first girl decided to leave you with the kids,for legality sake you don't have the right to kip them not unless the mother voluntarily left the kids to you. if you really don't have feelings to the first girl then just quit,there's no sense of being together,but have a serious talk with her and tell her that you don't want to be stayed away from the kids,tell her your going to give them your support,stuff like that,just don't make her angry or upset whatever because it would just make things worst. follow your heart man and always be good. have a nice day!