Romantics a Question.

United States
November 21, 2009 2:22pm CST
Would you be upset if your love told you Not to send her'him flowers?To me flowers symbolize either death or an insincere apology.Instead of seing them as a beautiful gift, I seee them as a sign something went wrong.so I'll tell my love not to send flowers , they will have a bad effect on the relationship. I guess I am not a romantic. would that really upset you?
3 people like this
19 responses
• United States
26 Nov 09
I think that if someone doesn't like certain types of gifts, then they should tell their significant other from the beginning so that there isn't any confusion and there aren't any hurt feeling later on down the road. Just because one doesn't like to receive flowers as gifts, doesn't mean that they aren't romantic.
2 people like this
• United States
27 Nov 09
Thanks. I will tell any guy before the first date that I hate flowers and small stuffed animals are a better idea.
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Nov 09
Hi sarahruthbeth22, I have told my love not to bother with flowers, although I have sent him flowers before (guys rarely get them from girls so it was a nice surprise for him). I do love flowers but I would prefer something more permanent, maybe a plant that flowers but cut flowers from a florist will wilt and look wilted and unsightly, plus it is something my mom used to always say, "It's a waste of money, just give me the money instead" lol. A note, or email to tell me he's thinking of me is so much more to me. Just because you don't want flowers sent to you, doesn't mean you are not a romantic, maybe you are just romantic in other ways, (hockey tickets maybe?) The idea of romance is to do something that the other person finds special letting that person know that he knows who you are and what you like not just flowers as the good ole standby.
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Nov 09
A "good ole standby" Exactly. Hockey tickets? How did you know? The perfect gift would be a stuffed bear dressed in a hockey sweater holding tickets to see the Wings play my Caps!
• United States
22 Nov 09
Wild guess from your hockey discussions? I am a Flyers fan...so I know how you feel. I got tickets for a Flyers vs Bruins game about 5 years ago for a guy, for Valentines. He thought it was the coolest present ever (selfish aren't I? I really wanted to go!). He told everyone in Boston and all the guys at there thought that was a great present too. It works both ways.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Nov 09
A Elyers fan?! Uh-oh. I'm a Caps fan. And My Wings swept you in the Final once. Can we still be friends?
@syaryel (155)
• Malaysia
22 Nov 09
hai, if I were the guy, I guess I'm pretty upset if my lover didn't want me to send her flowers. perhaps a little explanation is suffice to clear things up, other than that...hmm I'm gonna be so--upset (big time) :(
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Nov 09
Would you still be upset if I told you I hate flowers Before our first date? My view is so different that I wouldn't keep it from any guy I date. I don't want to upset anybody.
@syaryel (155)
• Malaysia
23 Nov 09
well that's totally a different sorry, If she/you told me about this before we even go out for the 1st date, honestly, I'm cool with that... why? different people will definitely have different view on things, so its best to be respectful..by the way, I'm not upset because she/you didn't received the flowers..its more to the rejection part, as if you didn't wanna accept my love (sounds pretty cheesy huh?) :)
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Nov 09
I don't see any love linked to the flowers, ever. I feel love by the way a guy treats me. If I can feel it, then flowers are not necessary. If I can't , flowers won't make me feel it.
@menolly22 (217)
• United States
21 Nov 09
That would not upset me. Although, I'm female and don't send my husband flowers. I had told my husband when we first met that I didn't like flowers. They just wither up and die anyway. So what's the point? If your going to give me something, then give me something that I can keep! Since then I've changed my mind. An occasional rose (or dozen) makes my day. I have no idea exactly what changed. I guess it's not the flower per say, but that he thought of me while he was out
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Nov 09
Call me paranoid but it is the thought ,"I better get her some flowers" is what I fear the most.What did he do that he thinks flowers will gloss over? I rather have him come home empty handed and just tell me.
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Nov 09
While I understand that, my next thought is, did something happen to you that would make you think that way? Like an unfaithful lover is the past? I think it's just the way some people have trained themselves to think of certain things, like flowers. I think you have something going when you say you would have a talk with the person you are going steady with 1st and let them know how you feel about it. To each their own!
@squaretile (3833)
• Singapore
3 Dec 09
well, i wouldn't be upset cos it's a great saving! especially around valentines day when the price of mere roses go totally crazy. as for myself, I'm quite a romantic so I'd like getting flowers on my birthday and anniversary. but not valentines. my hubby and i will laugh at those people we see carrying flowers on valentines day cos they have been conned by the florists!
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Dec 09
Flowers on Valentines Day are such a boring cliche!It shows these guys have no imagination. The best valentines Day gift for me is an Italian dinner and holding my hand while we see about St Valentine's Day Massacre!
• Canada
30 Nov 09
My husband's ex-wives hated flowers, I love them!! Romantic is different to different people. I don't like flowers because they are traditionally romantic, I like flowers because I LIKE flowers, and that's that!! If your partner truly loves you then he will understand if you like or do not like something, And if you mention that you like it or don't like it before he does it, all the better, so he won't be caught in a potentially awkward situation.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Nov 09
Since I would have such a hostile reaction to flowers I will tell every date Before we meet that I hate receiving flowers. I like pictures of them but the real thing? Never liked them, Never will !
• United States
25 Nov 09
Flowers can be overrated sometimes. But giving gifts is never over rated or too much trouble. I love giving gifts for the people I care about and love. I like getting gifts too though, but the fun is giving for me. I like gifts that say I belong. I love the feeling of belonging to someone or knowing they belong to me. I am one of those head-in-the-cloud romantics who think loves conquers all and endures all things. If you love someone and they love you, it's all that matters. Things will be all right in the end. It's one of the few things I believe in. It's why I have a heart in the clouds as my profile picture. Relationships are a lot of work, bu when you are dealing with the one you love, it doesn't seem like hard work, or work at all. It's something you enjoy doing, and something you miss terribly when they are not there. Any gift I would get from the one who loves me I'd deeply appreciate. My circumstances don't allow any gift exchanges so to me, a gift could be something as simple as a voice mail message or a phone call when none was expected. Those mean more than you could ever know.
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Dec 09
An email just saying I'm thinking of you is Far better than flowers! It takes some effort to type what and how you feel. Anyone can send flowers!
• Malaysia
22 Nov 09
Before we got married, my hubby loved to send me flowers at the office and sometimes, it was a pleasant surprise to me. I am not a person who is into flowers so much, but when I received the flowers, they could actually brighten up my day and warm my heart. If the situation is reversed, I won't be upset if my hubby tells me that he doesn't like me to send him flowers. He must tell me from the beginning though otherwise I won't stop pondering why he suddenly asks me to stop sending him flowers. If you see flowers in a different way, I don't think it's a matter of being romantic or not. It's just your personal view, but I don't know why you see flowers negatively. They are beautiful and men usually give flowers to their women because they see their women as beautiful as the flowers and some flowers like red roses symbolize love. Anyway, I hope your love respect your request and shouldn't be upset with you just because of that. He can always think of sending or giving you something else other than flowers.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Nov 09
There are two reasons. The first is I think it is too easy to just send flowers. Back in the day, I mean 19th century, when it was very hard and expensive , I could see roses meaning love. But now, they seem cliche' to me. the Second, every movie , soap , t.v.how I saw as a child and teen. When the guy did something wrong but wasn't going to tell his love he sent flowers out of guilt.That's why two dozen roses would mean he Really F@cked up big time to me.
@djoyce71 (2512)
• Philippines
22 Nov 09
If you are the kind of person who would not want your man to give you flowers because of your reasons (that I hope he knows), then I think it really would not matter and upset him. It is you, and his feelings for you, are what's important, I guess. He could give you other romantic ways or gifts that would show his love for you.
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Nov 09
Thanks.Knowing that I don't want flowers will show he Really knows me.
@stephon8 (300)
• Philippines
22 Nov 09
There are people who dont like flowers, maybe somewhat they are allergic or they just plain hate it. I wouldnt be upset if my partner dont want to receive flowers. I will be more Ok with it cause i dont have to spend money buying her flowers. I know some girls who dont like chocolates either, so it really depends to a person. Flowers are really important in expressing love but there is other way of showing love. We all have a different interpretation on flowers, whats important is the action of giving or receiving it.
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Nov 09
The main thing is to Know your partner's likes and dislikes.I don't want flowers,candy or jewelry from a guy .The best way to show he loves me is to tell me in words and deeds.
@rjvb26 (2518)
• Philippines
22 Nov 09
if a person has the same symbolism for flowers as yours,maybe that person would also not want to receive flowers. but for many people,flowers is a sign of their love for a person.it gives them the idea is very valuable just like the flowers that they have received.so if your partner thinks of that way too,maybe he/she'll be upset to know that he/she cannot give you even one flower because of that reason. maybe for you to be able to compromise to each other,why not allow him/her to give you even for just one time and then tell him/her not to give again. at least,you gave him/her chance to show his/her affection towards you and then he/she'd understand your point as well.
• United States
22 Nov 09
The guy for me Has to find another way.Even just one flower would send up warning signs to me. A great compromise? Ae-card with flowers on it. That way I Knew he one,had to search for the right card and two he Has to think of something good to write. That would mean more than any flower.
@bird123 (10486)
• United States
22 Nov 09
A person giving gifts wants to please.If you don't want flowers, great. There are a million other things I can come up with. Hmmm??? Won't expect my gift. It's unique, just like you!!!
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Nov 09
Thank you.
@ersmommy1 (12600)
• United States
22 Nov 09
I don't think flowers have all that much to do with romance other than as a symbol. And everyone has their own idea of what romance is. I wouldn't be upset. But someone else might be. To each their own. I think it is no big deal. Hopefully a person can respect a decision to or not to receive flowers.
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Nov 09
Knowing my luck The love of my life would love to send flowers.I will tell any guy I date not to send flowers. But if he Likes flowers,I'll send them to him,no problem.
• United States
22 Nov 09
Looka here Ms. Sarahruthbeth, NO NO NO just beacause U don't like flowers sent/given to U isn't a sign that your not romantic, it just means U DON'T LIKE FLOWERS LADY!!LOL STOP beating yourself up about it and tell your "LOVE" to SNAP OUTTA IT AND GO BUY U SOMETHING NICE FROM TIFFANY'S instead.
• United States
22 Nov 09
Thanks. I'll stop.The problem is I don't like jewelry either,lol!But I do like stuffed animals.
@MJAL08 (275)
22 Nov 09
i guess no, your lover would eventually understand that either way there are more things that he could give you like chocolates or even stuffed animals. Just be sure that if ever he mistakenly given you one, don't push the flowers away, accept them discreetly and tell him your views about "giving flowers"
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Nov 09
When we set up that first date or get together I would tell him Not to bring flowers!
@jewels49 (1783)
• United States
21 Nov 09
Hi Sarah..no it wouldn't bother me any. My husband knows not to bring me flowers. I do love them and I have flower beds galore, but I can't stand cut flowers, I hate to see them die just so I can have them in a vase. He got creative when our last son was born..he wanted to get me flowers and respect the way I feel..you should have seen the look on the nurses face when he brought me in a potted rose bush that needed to be planted..It's still in the top 5 romantic things he's ever done...and blooms like crazy every summer.
• United States
22 Nov 09
Cool move.I like that.
@ronnyb (6125)
• Jamaica
21 Nov 09
Well I like to think of myself as a romantic but I have always thought flowers too cliche and I have never sent snyone flowers However if my girl tolad me not to send her flowers then I would have thought that had some significance and she didnt want anything to do with me again .Cant see anyother way that could be interpretted because from as long as I know flowers were supposed to be a gesture of love and if she doesnt want any from you then I would think she doesnt want my love,unless she hates flowers and that is something youw ould have known from the start
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Nov 09
Before anything gets serious I will tell my soon to be steady I don't Ever want flowers.They send the wrong message to me.If he needs to get me something,make it a small stuffed animal.I love them. They are better symbol of his feelings than flowers.Don't take it personally if your love doesn't want flowers.It isn't you ,it is the flowers.
@krkavsy (192)
• India
22 Nov 09
It depends on his condition and mentality.
@jillhill (37384)
• United States
21 Nov 09
I wouldn't be upset...I personally like getting them.....to me they make a bright spot where someone says.....I care. So I'll take flowers anytime someone wants to send them to me! LOL
1 person likes this