do you mind if your grilfriend or boyfriend is not a virgin

China
December 24, 2009 5:44pm CST
I read this story in a book..and i want to share with mylotters and i want your answers. one couple have been in love for about 7years and one day the boy asked the girl:do you think there are still many virgins in this society? (His girlfriend is not a virgin when they fell in love and at that time this boy didn't mind) this girl kept silence ,she knew that her boyfriend does mind even though he says he doesn't mind. She's afraid that after they marry this boy will still mind and their marriage will be broken because of it.she worries that her "future busband" will leave her if he encounters a virgin girl. BUT she loves him so much,and she always feel sorry of him because her first time is forced by a bad man. what do you think of this story? do you think they will have a happy ending? can you share your opinions for this girl she needs suggestions.. thank you hope you all have a nice day.
1 person likes this
15 responses
@vinslounge (1297)
• India
25 Dec 09
I am not sure about the kind of ending they have but in my opinion, I dont think that the girl has lost her virgin morally. If her boy friend doesnt mind about her virginity, she must have intimated to him about the incident the time he met her. If she doesnt do that then it's her fault and she has to0 face the consequences.
• India
25 Dec 09
I can't accept this my friend. No person let it be a guy or a girl shall say about their virginity to the opposite. Unless and until they get a trust upon them that, they won't let them alone. Its common that a person has fears that his or her love may move away from them if they said about their virginity. This is shared only when they get the trust that the person they love the most would never leave them alone and would never leave their love in stake.
• China
25 Dec 09
i don't think a couple must talk about their virginity , if their partner minds they can explain it. If the other can't accept that it's best for them to look one else.
• India
26 Dec 09
hey my friend. There's no role for the partner to mind without saying it out. If the outer says openly about whats happened in his/her life before they uniting, it'll give strength in their relationship.
@shenfei (188)
• China
25 Dec 09
I kind of have this feeling that you are the girl mentioned in that story and it is the circumstance you are in. Well, personally speaking, yes her being not a virgin has a little negative effect on my feeling, but it is so gonna be got over. I say you(if you are the girl) stop feeling guilty and keep loving your boyfriend. Time can make him forget about this and realize what is more important. Be confident about your future. You can build a future you want.
• China
25 Dec 09
thank you..i will do my best to love my boyfriend . as you say guility doesn't do anything at all what i can do is to love him with all my heart.. thank you
• Philippines
26 Dec 09
How about you? Are you not a virgin anymore?
• Philippines
26 Dec 09
I apologize for asking that silly question. For me, I'm a man. I use to value girl's virginity. But now, I don't care. What matter most to me is the character. Although physical attributes mean to me, I will be more happy making love with a girl who has a heart of an angel than with someone who is a witch by heart.
@zjonier (39)
• China
26 Dec 09
My boyfriend and I all the first love.Though we are not marry, we have all our first time. luckily,now we have love,but because of reality(we don't have much money)he work for a few months and we live in two different cities.I hope in the future we will get married.Cause I think I care about future husband's thought. In fact,I believe ture love is based on trust,understanding and support on each other.
• China
26 Dec 09
you obsolutely can marry with your boyfriend .and i'm sure your life will be great enjoy it this matter is not a big problem.. good luck
• China
26 Dec 09
thanks for your replying. I hope i will marry him in future even though he can not buy the house of our's own. Only he love me and care about me and good to my family members.I beleive we will be happiness if we work hard.
• Singapore
25 Dec 09
It is about fate when two people fall in love regardless of virgin or not. Though the girl is not a virgin, what can she do about it? Retrieve her virginity? How? What's done cannot be undone, may I right to say that? From the story, looks like the boy has change his heart and using the virginity issue to break the relationship. The more love in a relationship, the more chances of breaking it.
• China
25 Dec 09
so you think they will break up one day?
• Singapore
26 Dec 09
I have 80% to believe that they will break up 1 day. The other 20% depends on the both parties willing to bury the hatchet or not.
@jasmeena (850)
• Indonesia
26 Dec 09
I don`t mind..we can`t judge someone from his or her virginity..they may have made mistakes in the past.but we must find out first,how it happened..as long as our partner is HONEST about it,no problems..the most important thing for me is HONESTY
• China
26 Dec 09
yes i agree with you i believe that honest is everything.. honest can defeat any problem
• India
25 Dec 09
Well not at all even i am still virgin now and it is my decision to be virgin now as well tell the time i will not find a true love for me as well...
• China
25 Dec 09
good luck wish you find your ture love
• Philippines
25 Dec 09
I believe every woman should mind about it because as they say it will be the best gift that a man could ever have. However, as the years come to pass, the world is continuously changing and we can't just stop such delicate thing. We can't just force anybody to keep it to them. Personally, i think a man should not mind it as long as he really is in love. The thing is, most of the men are not virgin and they don't have such thing. The most important thing to consider is the love that they are feeling and not just any thing else. It should be stronger than the physical attributes of the partner. We can do something about virginity if it is lost, but the opposite for love. Its built from a strong ground. Mind not the virginity, mind about Love.
• China
25 Dec 09
yes i'm sure love can win everything.. i'm sure that as time passes they two will nevet mention it and live happily.. thank you i can't be so negative..
• United States
25 Dec 09
I think that if he truly loves the girl, her not being a virgin shouldn't matter as much. I mean, I can understand that he would really care but he can't do anything about it now because she's not a virgin anymore. He says that he doesn't mind because he doesn't want to hurt the girl which shows that he really cares for her. The girl can't do much more than love him back with all her heart. She can't suddenly become a virgin again in his eyes unless he chooses to see her as a virgin because it was wrongly taken away from her by someone really bad. I can see how she would be afraid, but if she truly believes that the guy loves her for who she is now, then it shouldn't matter if she is a virgin or not, especially when it was wrongly taken away from her. I think they will have a happy ending if they don't let that issue get blown out of proportion, because what's done is done. As long as the two love each other, that's all that matters.
• China
25 Dec 09
i hope this girl can get over it and her boyfriend can never mention it maybe this boy doesn't mean to anything ..but this girl is so sensetive
• United States
25 Dec 09
If someone doesn't love you for who you are and your beliefs than they aren't worth your time or your love, that's my point of view on the subject. It shouldn't matter if someone is a virgin or not a virgin, your untitled to your own wishes and if other people can't respect you than that's their problem, not yours. I don't know if the girl in the story and her boyfriend will have a happy ending, it's up to them to work out their differences/problems, if he loves her than he should respect her wishes, being a virgin isn't as big of a deal as people make it out to be. A few of my friends are virgins and it personally doesn't bother me, it's their choice and their life. I think it's great they want to wait, I see so many girls lose it early and than sleep around with everyone and their brother, those are the type of girls we don't need around our kids now a days. I don't have kids but that's how I feel. Either way, if someone loves someone else and truly wants to be with them forever than they shouldn't have a problem with it.
• China
25 Dec 09
this girl can't leave this boy she loves him so much.. hopy this girl will get over it and can stay with her boyfriend for ever. thanks for your response ..thank you
• Philippines
30 Dec 09
No secret will remain secret forever. Sooner or later it will be known. So the girl should tell her boyfriend about her not being a virgin anymore for she was violated by a bad man. If the boy says it is okay for him, good. But if he says better to break the relationship, that is good for the girl, for then the boy manifests that his love is not that deep enough. Real love is not concerned with virginity issue.
• Indonesia
29 Dec 09
like the is woman [of] maiden because if in doormat still input and bleed , that I like . enjoy
@DenverLC (1146)
• Philippines
26 Dec 09
Virginity should not create a doubt to ones pure love and intention. But of course we all wanted our lover to be perfectly ours from the past, at present and in the future as well.
@andy77e (5165)
• United States
26 Dec 09
I have no suggestions for the girl. For the guy I would say, if that matters to him, he needs to break off this relationship and move on. If he accepts that she was raped, and not just some girl that ran around with boys, then he need to realize this likely bothers her, and not bring it up anymore for their rest of their relationship.
@Anneleia (54)
• Philippines
25 Dec 09
no, this is 21st century. besides, you should love your bf/gf for who they are. virginity is just a choice and past is past. so make the most out of the present. we only live once so we have to ive our best and love the person for what they are and become.
@OYGAK2005 (371)
• Saudi Arabia
25 Dec 09
i can't accept forever one of the no a virgin girl...because that girl future brcame my wife -my kid's mother .....and for me thta is impossible to accept no virgin girl.....