is it possible for no children in marriage world???

@bingchen (1126)
China
December 28, 2009 6:42am CST
i have married for several months,so the first i face is i have my owned child.but i think about the responsibility of money for child and have no confidence to give a child good family and make him/her happy.so i dont want to be my owned child.but i know it is impossible for us.because my husband have different view with me.he think that we have children and make our marriage better than before,i dont know how to make decision,because i am nearly30,my husband has at the age of36,i have no chance to select a child or not,sometimes i think that if i dont want to be child,whether it is not happy in my marriage,i feel confused at it,i dont know how to do and how to selcet in my life.
1 person likes this
9 responses
@rene12 (797)
• Philippines
29 Dec 09
A child is a product of your love with each other so it would be sad if you will not make one. My Aunt was married with my Uncle for about 4 years and still the cannot make a baby. One day they discovered that my Aunt is barren and cannot produce eggcells any more. My Aunt feels that she is going to break down but her husband is so kind that it made their relationship stronge. :D
@bingchen (1126)
• China
30 Dec 09
i find that the life could not be perfect what i expect,some people want a child in their life,but i think about too much and dont want a baby,in my mind ,i know that we have children and make my marriage perfect.
@silindaxu (208)
29 Dec 09
Hi Bingchen, I have the same anxiety with you. I married in the May of this year. My age is same to you. I don't like my present job. I want to change it. But I am in an embarrassed age. Because I haven't a children, some companys will not choose me. If I bear a baby now, I have to stay in the company at least 2 years. I can't image how I can spend these days. If you don't hate your present job, I think you should bear your baby now. The older you age is, the higher the risk bearing a baby is.
@bingchen (1126)
• China
30 Dec 09
i agree with your opinion,sometimes facing work's pressure and children problem always troulbe me.age could not wait me for children,i should think about baby at first.
@Galena (9123)
28 Dec 09
of course it's possible. having a child is a choice, not an inevitability. this sort of thing really should be discussed before marriage. but also, a marriage should be secure and happy as it is. it shouldn't depend on the introduction of another person to make it right. so without a child you should still be able to be happy together. if the happiness depends on having a child, then maybe it wasn't complete enough to begin with. you need to try and reach an understanding between you. it sounds like your concerns are good ones, but also ones that mean that you could be a good parent. the fact that you care about the quality of life you can give shows responsibility. and it's natural to be scared of so big a change. on the other hand. I don't want children. they don't really interest me, and my marriage is about me and my husband, not about having children. if I ever fall pregnant it will be an accident, but I'd just do my best as a mother. but I'll never intentionally fall pregnant
@bingchen (1126)
• China
30 Dec 09
i think about quality of my marriage,i dont want to devote my much time to look after children,but sometimes i feel alone because of no children,i find that i am every contradictory.
@myramae19 (667)
• Philippines
28 Dec 09
hi bingchen. A good marriage blessed with a happy, respectful, successful children is the crowning touch of a good life. yes, it's a big responsibility but its all worth it because its your own flesh and blood, your husband will be more grateful if you can give him a child, having your own child is the greatest gift from God. think positive and always put GOD in the center of your relationship. I can't imagine my life with out my son., for he is my everything. happy new year.
@bingchen (1126)
• China
30 Dec 09
i agree with your comment,a good marriage would not leave children.the children is center of our marriage,i should take advice with yours,
@maria1081 (1252)
• Philippines
28 Dec 09
Yes it is possible if you chose not to have children in marriage. But in my own opinion having children is the main purpose of marriage, beside from having someone you love for the rest of your life. God says procreate/multiply and fill the earth. I think its an instinct for first time mother to be scared with painful labor and delivery but many mothers agreed that all pain are worth it when they already carry their child in their arms. Both of you and your partner should take responsibily in having a child so that life would be easier for your family. Goodluck and stay happy always. Dont worry too much for tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry for itself.
@bingchen (1126)
• China
30 Dec 09
i have right to choose what i want,but i hope that i have my owned child with my husband,because i want to see my blood would be flowed with my child.i know i worry much,maybe i should make relax and not worry about many problem.
@jaiho2009 (39021)
• Philippines
28 Dec 09
Hello bingchen, Having a child is one of the greatest responsibility to take. If you think you are not prepared and not comfortable to have your own child due to some reasons,you can talk with your husband. Maybe you thinking that you can't be a good mother,but,once you had the chance to hold your child in your arms,you will surely feel the undescribable happiness of having a child. Even in your pregnancy,you will feel the happiness already. You can give it a try,your husband might be right,that,a child will brings more changes in your married life. It is possible for a marriage with no children at all...but, A child makes a family a whole...and a house is not a home if there is no child. Have a nice day friend
@bingchen (1126)
• China
30 Dec 09
thanks for your comments,actually i have never feeling to experience happyness as mother,maybe what you said is right,a child makes a family a whole.
• Philippines
2 Jan 10
As much as possible to have children in your blood is alright and you could give all the care you like like no other else. You could adopt if both of you agree but if you are both could live happy even without a child then it is also alright as long as both have already try all method then it fail. their is only alternatives if you think having could makes your marriage life look and feel complete then both should try their best to have a baby even at that age their still hope and never lose hope as long as both have no sickness their still possibility of getting pregnant as long as both never stop trying. Nothing could beat to see your own child they bring tremendous joy to any home.
@eddify (413)
• Pakistan
2 Jan 10
Mainly it is your choice and if both of u are agreed only then u should do it, but if u think ur marriage is not going on well. then u shouldnt be bringing someone into this world where he/she will be torn between both of u.
@ebuscat (5949)
• Philippines
29 Dec 09
Yap it is possible because the purpose in marriage is to have child because the family without a child it is not called family. If your husband need to be a child in you then why? not so let it be.