Do you thing more relationships fail when couples work different schedules?

United States
January 18, 2010 4:23am CST
I am realizing more and more that it appears my husband and I have more problems when his work schedule changes and we are not on the same schedule. Time already goes by way too fast, and when our schedules are off, it just seems like we can't handle balancing time for each other,for daily tasks for our daughter, etc. I was wondering this morning if this concept of working different schedules leads to higher divorce rates, etc. His schedule just changed yet again, we have certainly been down this path before, but now that it has changed again, I am noticing that those yuck feelings are starting to resurface because I feel like life's burdens tend to fall on me more. So the questions are do you think working differnt schedules leads to more problems, and if you and your mate do work different schedules how the heck do you balance the time properly between, together time, family time, alone time, and keeping up with life's daily tasks when the only signifant time you do have is on the weekends?
1 person likes this
12 responses
• India
18 Jan 10
yes more relationships fail becauseo couples work different schedules husband work different schedules and wife work different schedules both will not work eachother than the relationship fail
@ltruong (128)
• Australia
18 Jan 10
it wouldnt mean they wont work out.. if they tried hard enough and are willing to make sacrifices then it MIGHT have a better chance
@takkea (394)
• United States
18 Jan 10
I agree with you. If you really want to work to make it, then it should work out. Try to work at it as best as you can because you have to earn money to survive, especially now.
• United States
22 Jan 10
well it's conceivable that it can be a factor as to why a relationship can go south and eventually disspate because if schedules clash there's hardly any time to spend time with each other to keep that love live both are going to be stressed out eventually by trying to please the other by trying to make some time before sleeping to spend with that person and try to be happy or keep things as great as they were. but it's not necessarily a deal breaker it just means that both parts in the realtionship have to work that much more to make things work.
@ebuscat (5949)
• Philippines
19 Jan 10
I think it is not the reason because if you get a housemaid in your home then not a problem of burden some each one of you it is better that only one who work that is more income so that you manage your family or if you both is working then there's anyone is working as a par time.
@silverglint (2001)
• Philippines
19 Jan 10
I believe that communication is very important in a relationship. Having different schedules makes it harder to communicate and spend time with each other. It is a lot harder but it is not impossible to have a good relationship despite the difference in the schedule.
@SomeCowgirl (32266)
• United States
19 Jan 10
I am lucky to have a job wherein my husband can visit on his days off, or when he gets off work for the day but I am still at work. I've thought about getting a second job but have also thought that I wouldn't have time to spend with my husband. I hope that we're never put in the situation where we do have such different schedules, but I know surely we will some day. I just hope that we will have significant time together regardless. I'm sure it can be a factor in divorces though, and of course life is so tough that on days off or when getting off work, it's hard not to just want "me time" instead of "together time"... I'd say find an interest you and your husband are both active in and try to spend atleast a few hours a week doing that interest. Whether it be a movie or a date night.
@takkea (394)
• United States
18 Jan 10
As long as you can find time to spend with one another, it should not be a big problem. I think that you should not always be around your partner all the time. Plan time so that you can be together and just catch up. That makes a big difference.
@Kent90 (71)
• Malaysia
18 Jan 10
well, the only thing i can say to save this is communication. both must communicate in a proper way and must understanding each other, and try to think in their shoe. 2person with 2brain surely can come out some idea that benefit to both. but first you 2 need to talk at right time and right place, as well as the heart to accept the idea. for me i dont think that this can be a barrier to relationship. this is only depends of how you2 manage it and get the things done.good luck.
@jpso138 (7868)
• Philippines
18 Jan 10
Well it may certainly affect the relationship considering that there is less bonding time. But it all depends on the couple. If they work on different schedules the most important would be is to have a little time for togetherness. Otherwise there is always the risk of failure. Still there are those that the husband or wife works in a different country and usually just go home during vacations at least 30 days in a year and the relationship still is okay. So I would say that it really depends on how strong their love is. Bottom line for a relationship to succeed there should be trust.
@myfb2009 (8304)
• Malaysia
18 Jan 10
Not necessary when couples working on different schedules will ended-up in divorce. I had seen some of my friends whom, the wife is working on other time schedule and the husband is working on other time schedule and they are still able to have a nice family time together. They are still able to find time together with their 2 children and so far, i never heard them complaining about it. It's a matter of how both of you going to schedule your time together, to build a balanced and happy family life together. So, hope both of you will be able to work-out a suitable time schedule together.
@ltruong (128)
• Australia
18 Jan 10
i went through the same thing.. you just have to put up with it... take things one step at a time and dont get worked up over little things. you said the only time you had was weekends right? well in my opinion you should make that time together count. make it special so that you both can remember it. make each moment together count. i know its hard but it you love eachother the effort is worth it. if not, you will know in time and will go through a hard but necessary break up
@daliaj (5689)
• India
18 Jan 10
I went through many discussions that talked about the failure of relationships and I responded to some of them. I don't think that working indifferent schedule will result in the failure of a relationship if the couple is in love. It is a problem only if there is no overlap between the shifts of couple. In that case, one of them should be forced to quit the job and search for a better job.
@lelin1123 (15643)
• Puerto Rico
18 Jan 10
Well different schedules can be a problem but we all have to do what we have to do. So for me I have never really had that problem but my daughter and her husband do. However, they seem to not let it get them down. They work around their schedules in making time for date night and special nights of alone time. They do have a 3 year old daughter too. So they have family day and date nights. I sometimes think absence makes the heart grow fonder but I guess that doesn't work for all marriages. I alway think if the schedules change its not the fault of the spouse its the company they work for and they the employee do not have a say in the matter. Its either you have to accept the new schedule or find another job. If couples really love each other they will make it all work out no matter what.