My daughter put me in a tight spot this time.

United States
January 18, 2010 8:03pm CST
As my friends here know she is a hand full. She is now in a group home for a few weeks. Now she is also kicked out of school for three days. She wanted me to let her go to school and then walk home and spend the day here. I told her under no circumstances would I allow this to happen. Now I talk to her to night to find out if she told the group home. She tells me she is going to school tomorrow. Now I know she is not getting in there. She is trying to avoid the punishments she is going to have to suffer. She was kicked out before and had lots of chores to do. Now I don't know how to not tell on her and not make her madder at me. But,I know it's my right as a parent to let the workers know. She is expecting me not to say anything. I am trying to stop the fighting between the both of us. Now this has to happen. P.s she is kicked out for flipping over a desk in class. For the second time now. Please help me here. Thanks I want to call tonight before it gets late.
4 people like this
6 responses
@lilybug (21148)
• United States
19 Jan 10
What is the point of getting her placed in a group home if you are going to let her tell a lie and then come hang out at the house with you all day? I would call the group home and let them know she got kicked out of school and that she will not be going to school tomorrow if they send her out the door. I know you just want the arguing with your daughter to come to an end, but letting her lie like that is not going to help things. All allowing her to do that is going to do is show her that she has power over you and I think that is how you got in this predicament with her to begin with.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (105378)
• United States
19 Jan 10
Lily, you are most likely right on with this one. I hope she does it.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jan 10
I thank you for your help here. I called them and told them already. They are going to call her social worker tonight to inform them as well. If i did not call and they would have found out. They would have kicked her out of the program. Thanks agiain
@GardenGerty (105378)
• United States
19 Jan 10
Maybe just suggest that the group home would like to send an escort with her to school for awhile, so that she is "safe". You would not be telling on her, but you would give them a heads up. I think personally though, I would tell. If my standards include telling the truth, I would stick to those standards so that she knows about it, even if it is hard.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jan 10
I called them already thank you.
@callarse1 (4793)
• United States
19 Jan 10
Good for you! I'd call the school, too
@cream97 (29166)
• United States
28 Jul 10
To make things better for the two of you, your daughter should spend time in the group home. This will make her act more respectable to you and to herself. Plus others as well. She does not want to go because she will be expected to be responsible. But this will do her some good.
@will_win (222)
• India
27 Jul 10
Some time my mother gets frustrated on my brothers and she don't what to do and she thinks a lot but she mother never gave up, she try to be clam and give advise not be naughty and to be nice at school that teachers will loves you and she will give what he wanted..........I know its your right but to shout or do other things might not be solution ...anyway best of luck
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
21 Jan 10
I hate to have to ask this, but it simply must be done. In what way are you helping her by having her in the group home if you are also enabling her. I know that it is going to make her mad at you for you to not spend the day at home, however, she needs to learn that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction in life as well as in physics. She is never going to learn that she shouldn't do things that she knows is wrong if she doesn't get adequate punishment for them.
@chulce (1540)
• United States
19 Jan 10
You really need to make sure you put your foot down and not let her attempt to walk all over you. If she is going to misbehave and not act right, then she needs to suffer the consequences. She will never learn if you don't stand up to her and make sure that the group home understands what has been going on. It is more difficult when your children are in a group home because you can't control them, but you do have some power to simply say NO and to let them know that you will hold firm to what is suppose to be done. By showing your child in this manner that you are the parent, it will help in some aspects get it through her head that, you are in charge NOT HER!