If Im Not Interested, Why Bother Me?

@erikmama (12934)
United States
January 29, 2010 11:13am CST
I suppose this can apply to many different things, but I am speaking of MyLot. When I first joined,I admit I did send a couple of PMs to my friends with my referals. Not to join under me(unless asked) but to read my articles on other sites. I did not know at this time I could add it to my profile page. Then once it started happening to me,it became really annoying. Ive accepted friend requests then been bombarded by PMs with join this, you can make thousands, would you please join under me, etc. Now,if I am interested and you have asked about it or whatever,then it is a different strory.But there are so many people who want to be a 'friend"just to send you these links. If you want to advertise,theres plenty of spcae for that on your profile page. Sending me these links and trying to convince me to join this site under you is not going to work,and only upset me. Why do people do this? Why bother people with junk they are not interested in?
4 people like this
12 responses
@mysdianait (64058)
• Italy
29 Jan 10
This doesn't happen to me except for once every blue moon. I add a heck of a lot of users though but somehow they do not send links before making certain that I might be interested. So far they have all thanked me for adding them, asked a few pleasant 'time of the day' type questions and then asked politely if I am interested in seeing what they are involved in. At that point I am and I let them send their link but they know by then that I can't join everything. Many do know that when they offer something that I am not aware of that I think might work, then I will give it a try
2 people like this
@zed_k4 (17627)
• Singapore
30 Jan 10
Very well said..I like Diana's approach totally..
@vandana7 (64929)
• India
30 Jan 10
Zed me too. :)
@mysdianait (64058)
• Italy
30 Jan 10
It seems such an obvious way to do things to me...
@GoAskAlice (4315)
• United States
29 Jan 10
Hi erikmama! neelianoscet and kaylachan are right. If you don't tell the people spamming you that you don't want to be spammed, they'll keep doing it until you remove the people from your list of friends - and then they'll just spam the next person. You can also direct them to the myLot Terms of Use which clearly states that sending private messages with a commercial purpose is prohibited. You can even provide them with a link: http://www.mylot.com/o/terms.aspx
@Hatley (164654)
• Garden Grove, California
29 Jan 10
oh my gosh Alice I had forgotten that, private messages with a commercial purpose is prohibited. I have had a number of those' and completely forgot about that in TOS. serves me right for not rereading occasionally. wow.
@erikmama (12934)
• United States
31 Jan 10
Im with Hatley,I wasnt aware of that.I do read all of MyLot guidelines,byt theres so many that I can noe temember them all!!LOL!! I dont mind a referal link,but itd be nice to ask me if I am interested,or just send me one or something.Or a person who only asks for a friend request so they can PM nme with these links.
@kaylachan (4776)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
29 Jan 10
Quite often people who are on those sites rely on referals to make any type of headway. They can't get very far on their own, and its quite time-consuming. So they figure they are on an active site, and they can get more visitors by privite messaging people indivually. THey don't know, unless you tell them, that it bothers you. Perhaps you've posted for them before, or something... and they think you'll like whatever else. They've got going or what ever.
1 person likes this
@erikmama (12934)
• United States
29 Jan 10
No,it is usually once I have aaccepted a friend request, then I start getting a ton of them.I think you shoulsd ask me first, as someone did with a message yesterday. I dont do this to people.
@saphrina (31740)
• South Africa
29 Jan 10
It is strange to get these pm,s. But, unfortunately i am very ignorend and sometimes very forgetfull, if you get my meaning. Ignorance can be a very helpfull tool in todays life . TATA.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Jan 10
i really dont think ignorance is helpful at all in my opinion knowledge its helpful and powerful . .
@jellymonty (2358)
29 Jan 10
Ah welcome to the annoying part of my Lot! nothing more infuriating than people who send you referral links.
1 person likes this
@alilin28 (1530)
• Uruguay
29 Jan 10
personaly, for me, doesnt matter, its the same, because here isnt be a page like facebook or similars, like people see your life and the hole things that envolves (apart that you must acepted the request for the other person could see your personal life). thanks god that this site isnt be like this sites, if i concerned, here, we can give us opinion in a free mood. i think that people invites to be friends like a font to have many discussion into write. later, having here some experience, you see people who really discuss and write good post, and are know pepole. but i send invitations with the objetive that they accepted me, and have a new friend to discuss.. i see in this way,, have a nice day
1 person likes this
@zed_k4 (17627)
• Singapore
30 Jan 10
I don't mind a private message from a user if it's sent only once..but for repeated users sending me the same message, I can wonder at which line have I not made it clear or something. I think GoAskAlice has made this clear and we should make it clear to repeated users that they are spamming.
@mysdianait (64058)
• Italy
30 Jan 10
On those very few occasions that a user has sent a PM with an unrequested link I have told them to be careful who they send them too as it can be considered as spamming. I wonder if I did not accept the FR from those who only wanted to add me for that purpose. I add most of them that request but I guess my sixth sense picks out the ones it's best to avoid
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (64929)
• India
30 Jan 10
Hi Diana, that remark about FR has me checking your profile to check whether I am still on your friends list. he he. :) But people dont flood me with such offers. :) A few people I asked, because I wanted to give a few such referrals to some of my friends. My dad's doing a couple on my name. he he. But I dont. :)
1 person likes this
@mysdianait (64058)
• Italy
30 Jan 10
You are still there Vandana and I have no intention of removing you or any of the others. Once there you are stuck with me I might not get to all the discussions by everyone on my list but most know the reason why. I only have two hands and ten fingers capable of typing. I'm working on my toes for later though - but I need a new keyboard
1 person likes this
@Sandra1952 (6052)
• Spain
30 Jan 10
Hello, Erikmama. The thing is, so many people join MyLot with dollar signs in their eyes, and don't realise what they're missing by focussing only on the money. Granted, some people are desperate to earn money, while others are just plain greedy, but obviously this is what motivates them. I have had a couple of 'friends' do this to me immediately after acceptance. I kept them long enough to send a PM detailing exactly what I thought of them, and then deleted them. As far as I'm concerned, PMs are for catching up with friends and for private comments you might not want to publish on the boards. I had one friend who was PM-ing me about 10 times a day, and I deleted him as well, as I was spending more time replying to him than posting on the boards.
@erikmama (12934)
• United States
1 Feb 10
Yes, this is what I am talking about. 5 minutes after Iaccept here the messages come. I love money too and want to make as much as I can. Feel free to send me info about a site,but first,check out some of my discussions to see the types of things I am interested on.ANd dont ask me to join evert songle site you are a member of.And dont keep sending me the requests!! I had a guy post a comment (which I reported and THANK U MYLOT) was immediatley deleted in a discussion in which I was talking about my father passing.He said if you want to make money ask me how.I was PISSED!! Thats not one subject I take lightly and that was sooooooo disrespectful.But MyLot helped me out,and I told him about himself. Its so sad in this day and age when people care more about trying to get tmemselves money than anything else. Plus we have taks here. These people want omoney,so do we.You need referals,put it in a task and pay us a quatret to join. I just deleted several friends for this.
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
1 Feb 10
Thankfully I've not had this happen to me because if it did it would serve no other purpose than to drive me crazy. I personally am not trying to work on a ton of sites at one time. Right now I am working on just three. Once I've received a payout from all of those, I may consider taking on a new site, but then again I am working pretty hard with the sites that I am currently on. What I prefer is to look at the people's profiles and decide on what I would like to try out from there.
@gabs8513 (48716)
• United Kingdom
30 Jan 10
I don't know that is why I am very careful now who I accept and if I do accept someone and it happens I delete them because I know this is what they asked to be Friends for So your best bit is to just delete those "Friends" and then ignore it
• Philippines
30 Jan 10
there are different kind people the one is interested and the other one is not interested so you better patient on that situation , there's a lot of people there that are interested on you so you better talk to their .
• Philippines
30 Jan 10
Well for me, one notice is enough and i think they take the hint that im interested if i dont give them a reply. So far, i dont have friends in my list thats been bugging me about what they are offering. I wouldnt do that, i might message them once, and thats it.