SOCIAL CLIMBER: Great Pretender and Manipulative!!!

Philippines
February 1, 2010 2:11pm CST
Have you ever known someone who acts like a socialite and pretends to be rich or wealthy just to get attention and gain friendship? I do. I met her when I was still in College. She is so gorgeous (beautiful face and sexy body). That is a fact. Her beauty is not artificial but she is a fake. We became close friends. It is not because I thought she was rich. I mean I have a lot of friends who are not rich. My bestfriend is not rich. Almost all my friends belong to a well- to- do family but they are not rich or wealthy. They belong to the middle- class and some in the upper middle- class. Though I really have friends who are really rich and wealthy. However, I don't really consider that when I start a friendship with someone. Honestly, right from the start I already knew she was a fake. However, I thought she would evetually admit it as we became closer. I understand why she pretends to be someone she is not. Eventually, she started borrowing money from me without returning it to me. It is okay if she really needs it but most of the time reason she does not have money is because she parties a lot and spend all her money buying branded and flashy clothes. One time I have learned from one of our sisses in the Sorority that they went out and she was the one who paid for their bill. That was the time she borrowed some money from me. She said she is going to return it to me once she withdraws money from her bank account. I also learned from her roommate that the shoes and clothes she sometimes wear are not hers. She would wear her roommates clothes and even accessories without asking permission. How did I know? One time while we were in the cafeteria her roommate approahed us and asked her why she was wearing her roommates blouse. It was an embarassing scenario. It was me who wants to disappear. I don't know why there are people like that. I started staying away from her when she did something really bad to someone else. She was nice to me but real mean to other people. She uses her beauty to gain advantage. I stopped entertaining her friendship after two years. She spread nasty rumors about one of our close friends. It was then I realized that I should not wait for her to do something bad to me before I stay away from her. Sad to say that there were twelve (12) of us in our group and I was the only one who did not believe about that rumor. The other girls in our group believed her and stayed with her. However, I stayed with my friend whom I've known longer than her. My friend who has always been honest to me. In the end they have seen her real color and realized their mistake but it was already too late. My friend whom they have outcasted because of that social climber and great pretender b**** held a long time grudge with the rest of them. It took more than 6 years before she was able to forgive them about what happened. However, I am happy that our group is now complete again without that social climber, great pretender and manipulative b!*(&!!
5 responses
• India
2 Feb 10
there are many people like this...the world is full of them....there is a lot of variety in such people like the girl u met...they maybe nice to some people and cruel to others....u should be on their good side or you should be away from uch people....never cross them or get in their way
• Philippines
5 Feb 10
That's the reason as soon as I have felt the person is not real or true to me I stay away from that person as much as possible. That's why I choose my friends. I don't choose them based on their physical appearance, status in life, etc. I choose them based on what's inside their heart. I'm glad I was able to find those type of friends and they have always been there for me each time I need them.
• United States
2 Feb 10
She may not have been trying to be fake. My grandmother was a socialite and raised us around that type of life. She was a great hostess and I grew up with the idea that I would be that way to. I became an adult and did not have the number of friends or connections she had and quickly realized that I would not be just like my grandmother. She may have been raised that way and because she was so young and inexperienced in life she did not know. It does happen when you are very young and trying to find your self. As you get older you yourself will also look back on somethings and say I cannot believe I did that or me and my friends were like that. Remember to always forgive and forget because holding grdges will do nothing but cause stress and make your life and other around you miserable.
• Philippines
5 Feb 10
She was not born that way. I will understand if she was born and raised that way because I also have a lot of socialite friends. However, unlike her, they don't use other people for their own good. We eventualy found out she was an orphan and raised only by her relatives. She lives in a slum area. She told us she lives in a high end village. Though I have a lot of socialite and wealthy friends I also have friends who are not well to do. It is because I was exposed to povety because I graduated with a degree in Community Development and Social Work and became a volunteer for a lot of NGOs who help poor people. She just have to be real and that's it. I have already forgiven her and she does not bother me anymore. She sent me an email once just to inform she already got married to a rich man. I congratulated her and that was the end. I no longer want to have any connection with her.
@sublime03 (1811)
• Philippines
2 Feb 10
I like this discussion because I am recently conversing with someone who is a great pretender. I was nice to her and have shown that I was a friend but what did she do. She pretended that everything was alright and that she was okay with her boyfriends parents when in reality she has not been introduced. She says that she has these things that she does not need to say. There are so many stories that we now are questioning because they are just pure lies. We only learned about these lies when a person who she tells everything is not in good terms with her because of the character that she portrays. I hate these kinds of people and I hope that they never pretend because life is not about pretending but showing your true colors. Showing your inmost character because even if you pretend sooner or later it will catch up with you.
• Philippines
2 Feb 10
That is absolutely right! I don't know why there are people who pretend to be someone they are not just to gain friedship. If you are looking for friendship then you should be confident that the person will like you for what and who you are. Only then you will know if that person is a true friend. I hate it when people lie to me just to gain my friendship or so that I will like them. It is because they make me feel that I'm a shallow person and I will only want them to be my friend if they are rich, dress well, popular, etc.
@megamatt (14327)
• United States
1 Feb 10
Yes, those people exist in every corner of life. I have met them. People who do anything from mildly exaggerating to outright lying. I really do not know exactly what these people accomplish. Actually, I kind of do. They crave attention and will go to any lengths to get that. Even if they have to lie to themselves and others to get said attention. Unfortunate but rather true, I guess.
• Philippines
1 Feb 10
You are right that these people exists almost everywhere. However, I am smarter now in dealing with them. :) I stay away from them as much as possible. I remember this guy I met. He brags that he drives different cars. He is my officemate until now. It turned out that those were not his cars but his friends' cars. Sometimes his friends would drop him off in the office after they hang out. One time he was wearing a Ray Ban Aviator which according to him was original and given to him by his dad as a gift. One of our guy officemates borrowed it from him and took a look at the aviator. We found out it was a cheap imitation. What a shame! He usually does that to get the attention of the girls! I would say it is a pathetic way to get a girl's attention!
@jayrene (2713)
• Philippines
1 Feb 10
ive met and encountered a lot of those while i was in school at social groups. i really dont like those kind of people, i am a nice person and tries to be as nice as i can, im not rude even if i dont like the person. i dont get close to those kind of people, i stay away from them. but if they talk to me i wont push them away. i am not rich, though, but there are those that befriends me even if i dont have money, maybe some will use me in other ways so i stay away from them and dont get close.
• Philippines
1 Feb 10
Good for you Jayrene! :) For me I learned it the hard way. I easily trust people when I was still young. However, as I mature and grow older I've become smarter maybe because of experiences that I have. Sometimes even if I know someone is lying to me I still pretend that I don't know. That is if it is just a white or harmless lie. Like you I don't want to be rude and to embarass someone in front of other people. I know how it feels to be humiliated. That is the reason sometimes if I know someone is lying in a group just to be the center of attention during discussions I keep my mouth shut. I also learned that the best thing to do is to stay away from them.