It's my wedding anniversay but only me remembers...

Philippines
February 2, 2010 11:26am CST
Today is my wedding anniversary but no one seems to remember except me. My partner is so aware of the date today but he isn't aware this is the day I married him... He took this day as any ordinary days between us and never showed any hints he remembered...We're married for 3 years, by the way. How about you, guys does anniversary still matters to you or you are just like my husband who is treating it as nothing but an ordinary day in our lives...
6 people like this
31 responses
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
hi, thats the sad part i hear... but my hubby i still remember our wedding anniversary and we do celebrate it even our both extended famillies remember this ocassion even the day we become boyfriend and girlfriend we celebrate it also... maybe you need to talk with you hubby... maybe he is busy in work... there are things like that..
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
Hello, Arlene.:-) My partner and I never really celebrated the day we got hooked (boyfriend-girlfriend). But, he remembered our first wedding anniversary. As a matter of fact he was the one who greeted me first.On the second, he forgot the exact date and apologized for it. Now, he was completely oblivious. He is busy, indeed. But I am, too. Anyways, there are other factors that might have affected his forgetfulness like he was sick (and still is) and that too many workloads that needs to be done... Maybe... You are so lucky to experience great moments during your wedding anniversary.I'm glad to hear such testimony.:-)
@dpk262006 (55822)
• Delhi, India
3 Feb 10
Hi eureka! Heartiest Congratulations to you on your wedding Anniversary, which was on 2nd Feb., I suppose. I could see this discussion of yours today only. I agree with you that it pinches when the other partner forget the date of wedding anniversary. It is the one of the most important days in one's married life and I think most of the couples look forward to celebrate the anniversary. We both (me and my better half) always try to make it a special day and do not forget to wish eather (though we are married for many years, as compared to you). I think you should have a word with him that why your hubby does not consider your wedding anniverysary as an important date. Have a nice day! Deepak
@dpk262006 (55822)
• Delhi, India
3 Feb 10
Pl. read - "do not forget to wish each other".
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
Hello, my dear.:-) Thank you so much and you've guessed it right. Such an intelligent person you truly are.:-) You speak the truth of how I feel about this thing but I can't blame it on him,not right now. Daughter and he was sick , exactly a week before our wedding anniversary.Daughter is ok now but he is still having fever and I can't tell you how uncomfortable he is. Despite of his illness, he has to go to work, too. I don't want to be childish, even a little,just because he forgot the anniversary. I'm still human to forgive the father of my daughter. Besides, the celebration is not all about us but our daughter is the core reason for it.:-) Thank you so much for sharing your private thoughts about this matter. Your wife is a lucky woman to have a husband like you. Kudos for keeping up a wonderful marriage, my dear!:-)
@dpk262006 (55822)
• Delhi, India
5 Feb 10
I can understand your and your hubby's position, when he was unwell and your daughter was also indosposd, he could be given the benefit of doubt. It is good that you believe in forgiving him for his failutre to greet you, it is your greatnes. Thanks for your wishes for me. :-)
@ghieptc (2525)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
Yes, I think we have in common because my husband treat it like an ordinary day in our lives.Maybe I don't understand their point of view.There is a lot of things to say but It's up to him.
@ghieptc (2525)
• Philippines
5 Feb 10
I think they treat it like an ordinary occasion because every occasion is expensive. And they forgot anniversary because all men is like that they got memory loss. On the courtship day they remember it but on the marriage life they forgot it. I recommend to all marriage men to take a medicine so that they can remember.
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
I don't think all men do forget this kind of special event in their lives(if ever they are in the situation). If you noticed some of the respondents here are men and they don't forget.I guess, it is really depends upon the person we married to. Some are not really that sensitive about this kind of thing that they just treat it just like any ordinary day, or maybe, they jjust don't value it as much as we, women, do..-
@ghieptc (2525)
• Philippines
7 Feb 10
Thanks for sharing your thoughts! Happy Valentines day to you.
@esjosh (915)
• India
3 Feb 10
Happy Anniversary dear. In my case, she has forgotten entire me, it hurt me, but I am not complaining, as I believe life is so short and so much to do in it. "Live the best and Leave the rest" If he had forgotten it, remind him and tell him to take you out some where for a dinner or movie or for a romantic walk at least as punishment. Once again {H}}{A}{P}{P}{Y} {A}{N}{N}{I}{V}{E}{R}{S}{A}{R}{Y}
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
Hello, Esjosh.:-) Ouch! that is alot painful than what I had been through because my partner has forgotten our wedding anniversary... But, I won't say I'm sorry to hear that because I can sense you are over with it now.:-) We often go out the past few days and I don't think it is kind of special if he will treat me out again.All I was expecting from him is a gesture during that day and a sign that he remembers but, sigh... Anyways, thank you so much for that words of yours. I;m beginning to feel better.:-)
@esjosh (915)
• India
4 Feb 10
You felt good in the end is more important, God bless you!!! And I wish your hubby will never forget such important dates.
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
I'll be hoping next time he'll remember.:-)Thank you again, Esjosh. Have a great weekend.:-)
@salam1 (1475)
• Malaysia
18 Aug 10
very sad, you have to remind your husband about this big day. i know most women like to celebrate it, as a man i think one should appreciate the marriage relationship everyday. everyday, so, anniversary date is not an important point to me.
• Philippines
18 Aug 10
Hello, Salam.:) Wow, you have dug this out and replied.I truly appreciate your effort.:) It was quite a sad event, I must admit and for him, just like you, a date is nothing but just any other dates. With or without celebrations. As for this particular event, I did not said a word but I guess, he saw this discussion and was able to read everything because when he got back from an out of town trip two three days after the wedding anniversary, he got me a ring and greeted me happy anniversary. I appreciated his effort to make up with me but I' m trying to teach myself not to really put big deals on special dates... Good morning.:)
@34momma (13918)
• United States
3 Feb 10
i would so not be happy with my hubby if he thought our wedding anniversary was just another day! shame on him. I would be very unhappy. to me it's a special time in the lives of a couple. and they both should take that day very seriously each and every year
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
That is something that I had hoped for when I decided to marry the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. Unfortunately, my situation is not favorable for him and maybe, he thinks that our wedding date was just nothing and a mere result of the consequences of what we did.... I'll be lucky if my husband would value our relationship and our wedding date enough to celebrate the memory of the exchanges of our vows every year... Thank you so much, 34Momma, for sharing your thoughts. Have a beautiful weekend.:-)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
That's really sad to hear. Today is also me and my boyfriend's 8th month together, and he forgot that it's our monthsary! Well my dilemma isn't as much as yours, but I kinda get where you're coming from. Girls I guess are more emotional and prone to take these things more seriously than men. I guess it will also be of help if you talk it over with your husband, I'm sure after he hears your side he'll make up for it and give more attention 'bout matters like this. Good luck!
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
We did not celebrate monthsary because we think it is not really something that we should be celebrating. However, wedding anniversary is way too different compared to a monthsary... Wedding date is the day when you decide to give your whole life to the person you don't even owe anything.Promising to be with him for the rest of your life, for better or for worse, etc... And, I don't expect my husband to make it up to me. There'll be no chance... Better for him not to say anything about it. Maybe, by next year, I'll be posting a different story about this... Thank you for sharing your views and feelings about this topic, PocketRocket. Have a great weekend.:-)
@diyonzi (117)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
i think it really depends on the person. because i've went out with several guys in the past.. some of them do not remember or celebrate anniversaries and stuffs but some do. they even know the exact number of weeks we're together!! i think celebrating anniversaries are really important in a relationship whether grand or simple.. the important thing is you remember when and how you started being together.. it's like renewing your vows. Maybe you can open this up with your husband so that he'll know that somehow it has bothered you that he doesnt remember your wedding anniversary. Sometimes, guys can be so clueless! haha He may not intentionally forgotten it and he might make up for it and remember it the next time. ;D
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
It is true that celebrating wedding anniversary is like renewing vows. This is precisely the main reason why it is truly a big deal to celebrate it. My husband need not to be reminded about this. On the first year, he remembered. In fact, he was the first one who greeted me. On the second year, he forgot the exact date! (Because there were other things and other women that occupied his thoughts...) Now, he was totally oblivious.. He is the type of a person who is kind of thoughtful ,only, if he prefers to and only to the person he prefers to be thoughtful... So many reasons, Diyonzi... But, right now, I don't want to think about it.. I will just move on with my life and hope that next year it'll be a different story... Thank you for responding and sharing your thoughts about this... I really do appreciate it so much.. Have a great weekend..:-)
• United States
3 Feb 10
My anniversary came and went this month. My issue is no one in our families remember. I am so proud of my marriage(with it's highs&lows). It bugs me that it is not celebrated more. True, marriage has been around a while, but now a days it seems to have lost its importance. I married young. We are still in love. That is sacred. I feel that day should be posted on the rooftops, or at least given a shoutout? You know 'Happay Anniversary'. from the people who made the day special. Does it matter to you if anyone remembers an important dates in your life?
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
Happy post anniversary to you, Mdawson.:-) It is a sad thing that most people view anniversary such as wedding just like any other ordinary day. It is not easy to maintain a good marriage much more to stay in a relationship. Any marriage that existed for years needs to be celebrated and be recognized, I believe... It does matter, alot in fact, that someone ( even a single soul) remembers a very important date in our lives... Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings about this.. Have a great weekend, my dear.:-)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
Due to unforeseen circumstances and possibly an unidentified illness, some men find it rather difficult to be passionate about these kind of issues. An anniversary sure is one of the biggest days of the year but its some kind of retardation that keeps men from having a heart regarding matters like this. Theres a lot of literature saying that a woman is a bunch of nerves and a man is simply a cold living heart and this is the case with your husband. Really you cannot blame him for what he did since it is his limitation that prevented him to be concerned enough and not that he refuses and doesnt care at all. You can see in other ways that he loves you.
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
Hello, Cowboyofhell.:-) Thank you for putting that out to me. One way or another you have a put there. And, I don't take it against my husband that he forgets. However, since women are "bunch of nerves" we are very sensitive about this thing. We are very much a feeling person compared to men, I guess. :-) Though, I'd like to always understand shortcomings like this but I am, in the deepest part of my heart, hoping that Somehow my partner will be a little sensitive to special things we shared and an anniversary is one of them...Well, men... Than k you so much for sharing your thoughts about this matter. I really do appreciate it alot. Have a wonderful weekend.:-)
• Hong Kong
3 Feb 10
you should always tell her when she forgot those days, everyone is not good in memorizing because of works or other business going on, i always forgoten the special day because of so tiring works everyday..
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
I am in the stage of a relationship where I need not ask my partner to do things for me because I want it. I want him to do things for me because HE wants to. We've been in roller coaster ride and I just don't want to expect anything... Only it hurts still that he did not remember the day we were married to... My partner is also bad in remembering dates so I am giving him the benefit of the doubt...
@flagella08 (5069)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
well you can let him help remember it. our anniversary day is really a big deal for me and my husband. it's because we're counting the years of our marriage and we will so thankful if we will reach 20 years together. that's already a huge accomplishment for us.
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
Being able to stay married to the same person for 20 long years is really an accomplishment,Flagella.:-) A day with someone who is less perfect like you is already tasking and being able to tell yourself you love him and still want to spend the rest of your life with him is really something. That is why this wedding anniversary is very important to me. My husband and I was in a topsy turvy kind of relationship and to last even at least 3 years still being with each other is a big deal... Just sad that he did not remember... Goodluck and God bless your marriage.:-)
@angelajoy (1840)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
I feel so sorry for you. I'm not yet married, but I have a boyfriend and we always celebrate our anniversary. I would feel bad too if he would forget our anniversary. Maybe you should try to talk to him about it.
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
It is pointless to talk to him about this matter. He did not remember so it is understandable that our wedding is just like any ordinary days for him... On the second year of our marriage, he apologized for forgetting the date. Now, he did not say anything though I am so sure he already saw this post and also my FB account wherein I had posted something about our wedding date. Well, there'll be next year. Let's just see if this thing happens again... Thank you for sharing your thoughts, Angelajoy.:-)
@junrapmian (2170)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
I know what you're going through now, I've felt that feeling six months ago. My husband and I are not used to celebrating anniversaries since the time we get married. I just let it passed. But, 6 months ago was our 25th wedding anniversary! For God's sake! He hasn't remember either. I was expecting that there may be a dinner or something to share with the children, but there was none. I was looking for a hint if there would be surprises at night but there was none until all of us fell asleep. Anyway, what I did the next day was to go to church, thank God for all the blessings and the health that my family is experiencing during the years that were married. It really depends on the person, maybe, my husband is not the romantic kind or maybe, age has taken its toll, he's got memory gap that's why he forgot our anniversary.
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
I think your husband was so used to not celebrating your anniversaries that it did not occur to him to celebrate it this time, too... even if it was a 25th anniversary... Sad thing that we, women, are taking this thing as a big deal while men take it as something so ordinary...But, I guess, too, that your husband has been so content with his relationship with you that it did not bother him if you don't celebrate the anniversaries as long as the love that both prompts you to marry each other does still exist.... You are a good woman and a good wife to still find a reason to thank God for the wonderful blessing despite of you getting disappointed.. I admire you for that.:-) Your husband and kids are so lucky to have you as part of their family.:-)
@p3ks626 (6552)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
I think your husband just have a lot of things in his mind. It is indeed an important day for the two of you. If he doesnt remember I dont think he doesnt care at all. He is also not a mind reader so it would be good if you are also going to help him remember it.
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
Sounds like I'm hearing your words exactly from my husband;s lips.LOL He'd tell me that (he's not a mind reader) for sure. And, yes, there were plenty of things on his mind during that day, week to put it correctly.Plus, he was also sick and is still sick until now. He has no time to think of anything personal and intimate or no time to think about us. all he was thinking was how to get his work done and take a rest asap... Well,there'll be next time.. I'll just wait for it, then.:-)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
Oh that's sad, but you should not take it against him, most guys don't remember dates especially anniversaries, the reason for this is unknown. Don't worry, you are not the only person who have experienced that. What's important is that you are together and happy.
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
LOL. I know. And it seems that the majority here is telling us that men are forgetful.:-) I feel better that my case is not an alien to most of the people here. It is quite a mind puzzling thing but I'm not sure if there'll be ever an answer to this. Thank you for that uplifting remarks you posted here.:-)
@ybong007 (6659)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
shucks! i forgot when mine is... i just treat wedding anniversary like any ordinary days. just like how i treat my own birthday. But it doesn't mean our wedding doesn't mean anything to me anymore.
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
Ybong, you are such a typical man.:-) If the people around you are used to know you being like that then you have no problem at all. It is just you and that's how the way you treat any occasions in your life. But, my partner is different, he used to remember our wedding date during our first anniversary. As a matter of fact, he was the one who greeted me first. But, on the second, he forgot the exact date and now,he was completely oblivious about it...Still, I'd like to understand him but I must admit it hurts a little though...
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
me and my husband had our 5th wedding anniversary last January 22. I don't mind actually if we don't celebrate it (but we did he treated our family a dinner), as long as he remembers and greets me on that day, I'm fine with it.
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
I wasn't asking of a celebration,either, my dear. But, I was hoping he'd remember at least to greet me or just even say "Hey, Honey, it is our wedding anniversary today" or something like that. At least he remembered which is precisely the point... Well, belated happy anniversary to you. I hope you ill have many more in return.:-) God bless your marriage. :-)
@mutpal74 (314)
• India
3 Feb 10
Hi friend, it happens in life, take for example I never remember anybody's birthday and anniversary but my wife does. That doesn't mean that I don't care for any body.I feel proud that my wife is so careing about all.But as I said I mostly forget due to my hard work schedule but once remembered I tried my best to make the day memorable for us.
• Philippines
4 Feb 10
Hello, Mutpal.:-) You are a gentleman, indeed. I don't take it against my husband if he did forget the anniversary. Besides, we are confronted with a situation wherein he and our daughter got sick. I don't think any man would think of anniversary if they are so sick to even think of eating at all. It is just that, I'm quite sad about it. Being a wife and a sentimental one at that, this event is very important for me. But, of course, I am giving my husband the benefit of the doubt... Maybe, next year it will be a different situation, I hope it'll be a better one.:-)
@myramae19 (667)
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
Hi eureka How could he forgot your wedding day, you've been married for only 3 years.. maybe he'd remember but he is not romantic, sweet or thoughtful? how about your first year wedd anniversary? like you I've been married for three years, but we only spend our first year together. the second, and the third year we're apart. On our first year, the three of us went out for lunch him,me and our son. And he surprised me with a classic silver round solitaire which I didn't really expect, I didn't prepare anything for him, for me greetings will do. On our second and third year, we just exchange greetings. The first year is really memorable. If your hubby is not thoughtful then you must be the one to give effort to every wedding anniversary will come, and maybe in the future he'll realize that he should give an importance to your anniversary day. Good day.
• Philippines
3 Feb 10
Hello, Myramae. I know he totally forgotten about it. A week before the day, daughter was sick and when she was ok, he was the one who got sick, too, eventually. Until now, he has fever. I just check on him right now. Our first year anniversary wasn't that memorable either. We were apart because of work. We just exchanged messages (he posted those messages in his blog). Second year, he forgot but I told him about it, he thought we were married on the 7th of Feb!!! On our third, he was completely oblivious about it. (This is the first time we were suppose to celebrate it together) Well, men... Thank you so much for sharing your ideas with us.:-)