What is wrong with me??!!
February 10, 2010 7:44am CST
there must be something wrong with me.Maybe the way i smell or the way i look? I always make friends very easily but they are usually acquaintances and most of my friends have like, partners with them i always go on my own everywhere and when i pick up the phone, i realize i have noon to call. Its not like, i'm a loner but i probably am. I don't have anyone to hang around in the weekends, or im. I don't understand why i am so unsocial but its not like i am not trying hard. With my peers, i generally have nothing to talk about, well, nothing too interesting to talk about. All they ever talk about is experiences, makeup,dates events but i find it dull and boring. I try hard and talk to them but its just there is nothing very special to talk about and they gradually drift off. New people are easy at first but i also find there is nothing good to talk about with them and i also find it very awkward too. :( The boys at my school are generally too shy and intimidated by me and only a few could talk but then, i want some girl-friends. Please help. i know i probably sound really obnoxious and selfish but i don't know what's wrong with me.
1 person likes this
11 Feb 10
Maybe you haven't found your right niche yet? Sometimes it takes a while to find that special set of friends that you can really connect with. It doesn't happen over night and really takes a lot adventures, mishaps and misunderstandings for that to happen. Like in any other relationships, developing friendships is really hard work. You got to really invest time, open yourself to heartache to sow the rewards of having someone beside you when all else fails. That happens to me a lot. I was always on the move and I only had two years at most in a place so I'd always end up having friends but not so strong friendships. SO I think I know how you feel when you feel not totally part of group of friends. But I have stayed in touch with some of them and we still share stories and we continue to update each other about our lives. Don't worry you will find the right friends. Just continue on sharing and being genuinely caring to them and you will not have a problem. IT might take a while but you will get there.
10 Feb 10
Well from reading the start of your post I thought "how old is this person?" then reading on you say you're at school. I wouldn't worry about it too much and no you don't sound obnoxious or selfish, just fairly confident possibly which some guys might find intimidating, but there's no reason you HAVE to change to suit others. Be yourself and respect yourself. Sometimes the problem with making new friends very easily is that you have too many casual friends but no one to call when you really need to chat, so maybe you could be a bit more selective when making new friends. I make friends easily but have found over the years, it's better to concentrate on making close friends with just a handful of people who will hopefully be friends with you for the rest of your life, people with similar tastes as you in music, places to visit and how you feel about things like politics or religion, whether or not you care about these things at all, it's good to have friends who are like-minded and also sometimes it's good to have friends who are quite different from you so you can learn from each other :)
• United States
10 Feb 10
You don't sound obnoxious or selfish at all. You sound very interesting. Well let me have a shot at this as I consider myself quite an expert at making friends and becoming quickly popular though I'll admit most of my friends remain at the acquaintance level and I have a very small number of very close friends but that's all down to my choice. So first off, the key to getting to know people and having them be interested in getting to know you is LISTENING. It's all about asking them about themselves and encouraging them to talk to you about THEIR interests and THEIR views and opinions on the world. Now you might want to chip in, you might want to disagree and that's all good but at first and for a while, resist the temptation to do that. Try to see things from their point of view. Imagine being in their shoes. If they say something you find completely the reverse of what you think or feel, try to understand why - ask them to explain their point of view. Try this with a few people you know. That's my first tip. If you like it, I have a couple of more and will come back to share.