Do you think there any justification for Infidelity?

United States
February 12, 2010 2:27pm CST
I have seen many couples that have experimented infidelity, I have seen also that the person that do it always have a justification for that, in my opinion they are just cheap excuses, in order to hide their culpability. But I have also heard, by some psychologist, that when an infidelity happens, both persons of the couple are guilty, in my opinion, the guilty is the cheater and there is no excuses for that. What do you think? is there any justification for someone who commit infidelity?
2 people like this
7 responses
@Bearballew (1149)
• United States
13 Feb 10
Absolutely not. However, couples really should seek wisdom and counseling before committing to each other. Most people think counselling is only for when there is a problem. It's not. It is for before you make a decision. Not after you've made a few you regret.
• United States
15 Feb 10
Oh I totally agree, if people would seek counseling when they are in those moments when they don't know what to do, there will be way less divorces in this world. Most of the times, but the times couples really goes to counseling, the relationship is so destroyed, that sometimes there is nothing to do, that's why it is important sometimes to spot the first signs of a problem, to be able to control the situation without goes out of hands.
@piya84 (2591)
• India
13 Feb 10
There are many reasons for infidelity and i dont think so it is justifiable thing.Sometime there are serious reasons and sometime there are silly reasons like guy or girl was drunk.I know only one thing i cant tolerate and take back person who cheat on me no matter what was the reason.If they have some problem then need to sit down with me and talk about it.Thats how it shoul work in ideal situation.
@scaflone8 (191)
• Philippines
13 Feb 10
Infidelity for me would be one of the breaking points in a relationship. But there are times when it is true that both of you are at fault. One example would have been my situation. I had a boyfriend who had a problem of trusting people. When we were together who would get mad at me just for not picking up the phone right away or not telling him where I was and whom I was with. Whenever I ask his permission I would go somewhere like a party or just going out with my friends. He would always talk to the person whom I'm going with just to verify. It was O.K at first then eventually I was tired. I did confront him that It shows his lack of trust. He was always afraid that I was with someone else. I really had no plans of cheating on him but it happened one night when I was out with friends this guy came up to me and wanted to know me. My boyfriend and I were not talking at that time because he got mad I did not answer the phone, I accidentally left it at home and he did not believe me. At first I was hesitant but I gave him my number because he did seem to be a very cute and nice guy. I met up with the new guy a couple of times first out of curiosity. In the end I broke it off with my boyfriend because I was being unfair. Now the new guy is my current boyfriend. I never did intentionally wanted to cheat on him and I was guilty of it because I was allowing it. But there are just situations that Might lead you to cheat. You must love your partner so much that he would not look at someone else, always put your trust and never ever think he will cheat because someday it might happen.
• United States
15 Feb 10
Well yes but you realized that it was not fair and you ended the relationship, that is perfectly valid, we are all exposed to fall inlove to someone while being with our couple, what we do with those feelings is what is our responsibility, I think you manage it well.
@cripfemme (7719)
• United States
12 Feb 10
I think that most times there's no excuse for infidelity. However, sometimes there are mitigating circumstances. If it's really not working out, you should just get a divorce, not be unfaithful. Perhaps if your being threatened to stay in the marriage or scared to leave your partner, it might be excusable.
• United States
15 Feb 10
I totally agree with you, infidelity is just a symptom that things are not working out in a relationship, and honestly I think that when a relationship is not good it should be ended, because the harm will be way less than if one of the persons goes and cheat.
• Philippines
13 Feb 10
Their are many types of infidelity and i think i could identify only two which involves the actual acts and the one which involves with the mind, The former is more dangerous since family is often affected with adultery liaison it often end up in divorced or separation while the latter is a psychological testing if one partner would proceed with a plan or easily get tempted and so it is a matter of focus, trust and credibility. Although, it is like a trial and error which every couple undergo. likewise if the other partner tolerate the other partner would eventually succumb to the temptation and so it is a matter of understanding and acceptance. Like in an instances both test each other fidelity which only contain a relationship that develop no trust if both believe and respect each other their is no need to test. Since if both force each other to try themselves it only open the door for adultery to happen and one partner could be blame and those kind of situation is not acceptable when the other partner is not really a womanizer. so it is best not to try the test and one things for sure is to discover more strategy to make the love more exciting and stronger to focus on each need and fill in what some aspects in the relationship is lacking.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
13 Feb 10
Infidelity is wrong any way that you look at it. There is no good excuse for betrayal of the heart. Guilt , blame and shame belong to the cheating party. The one who has been cheated on is the victim and should not feel lessened by the crime.
@bystander (2308)
• Philippines
13 Feb 10
for me, there is no justification for fidelity. that may sound ultra-conservative, but that's what i believe and practice. even in experiments, relationships, particularly those bound by marriage, should be upheld all time time...