Would you be okay?

Nope, I wouldn't be okay. I'd be stuck. I have no job, no money put aside. So unless I was to ask a friend or family member for help (which I couldn't do as I couldn't impose on someone like that) I'd be stuck where I'm at now. Fortunately my marriage is going good, though I have to admit it isn't always easy. But then again it never is when you're in a relationship. Happy mylotting!

I would not be ok. I gave up my job, about 6 years ago to take care of my disabled son. We have no extra money for anything. I am so glad that my husband takes everything with a grain of salt. I would not be able to survive without him.

Oh, trust me, the thought has crossed my mind to leave before because we've been going through a lot of issues in the past year. Of course, it all boils down to the medical issues that my husband has been dealing with, he hasn't been himself due to those issues. However, I'm still here because I know that I love him and that there is nothing that we can't work out with time. If I were to leave I know that I would not be okay, I have two children aged seven and three, two dogs and one cat. The only place that I would have to go is my mother's and that isn't a viable option at all.

Hi dloveli..The homeless situation is this country is a discrace. I see it every single day of the week. Undeserving people just like you and I with children and pets and no where to go. The shelters are all full and there is not enough of them here in south Florida. I see famalies living in their cars...Can you imagine trying to get your children to school everyday after a night in the car? Most of these women try hard to hide it too for fear that DCF will take the kids away. Would they be better off if they were taken away? So many questions, so few answers. I just know that its getting worse by the day and our President needs to address this and do something now..I've heard he is thinking of putting a freeze on forclosures but that has not materialized yet..and is it enough? The unemployment here is ridiculously high as well..no jobs,,no food, no place to live..and this is supposed to be the best place in the world to live?? Granted we have it a lot better than most countries, but tell that to the family living in the back seat of their car. I have been there too..I was lucky enough to be able to pull myself out of it but I also didn't have kids..I live in a relationship that to be honest with you probably would not be in if I thought I could make it on my own. With the cost of everything today, I could not do it alone so I stay. So the answer to you question is "No, I would not be ok"..me and thousands others..Something has got to change, but what, and when? Can anyone answer that?

I'm thinking about a homeless shelter were my sister ended up only she had two kids not just one & one was a newborn & one was 3. Sadly though she'd have to give the dogs to somebody. Luckily for my sister we looked after the pets til they got a house. Sorry for the short life story there!

I feel so sorry for that woman and for all the others who have actually experienced such fear in the hands of men. Even though I'm a man I know how it feels when a woman is trap in that kind of situation. I have witnessed how my mother became a battered wife under the hands of my father when he's drunk. Good thing my father had change for the better so we went back to normal. I hate it when a man hurts a woman. I hate it when men instills fear to women. When I saw it happened to my mother I vowed never to become a man unworthy of my partner's love and I would never raise a finger or lift my hands against any woman no matter what

i am very fortunate that i never depended on my hubby for my living expenses and everything... i work full-time myself and the money that i earn i save it for rainy days... so in case something happen to me, yes i will definitely have the money to survive and live on my own... but i hope that will never have to happen... i love my hubby very much and vice versa... so i hope we will share our lives and grow old together... take care and have a nice day...

Of course everything will not be okay now but as soon as there are people who are willing to help me everything will be okay. That is the initial situation, it will not be okay, I will do the drama, I will cry I will feel regrets i will blame someone, I will blame myself, I don't know what to do. We all have been there but after all that, everything will pass and everything will goes well. I will surely do what you are doing, you have a secretbank so that when this things arises, I have a money for emergency. If a man wants me to leave, I will leave but with my children and pets.

Hi dloveli! This is such a sad story! I feel very badly for this woman! I know that you tried to help her and you felt like you wanted to, but couldn't! And these are the kind of woman who end up being abused or worse! I can feel her pain with no one to help her and nowhere to go. I think that you are quite smart having that "secret stash". I don't have children and my apartment is "mine", but I do know what it is like to be in a similar sitation. I just hope that this woman will be alright~ All we can do is pray~

i'll leave him. i'll ask for my family's help. i'm sure they will help me, i'm sure it will be not ok. but it's better for my further life.

some of people has bad behaviour and they may do bad things to save their selves.but if we suffer something like that we must be sure about the person. i was in some plase and a person told me he lost his money, then i gave hem some , but when i came back he told me another story, so i told him i must take you to police , then he run away. in the life we must be good with others but we have to take care.

That's hard but I would ask if needed the police to get away from him. They would have information on shelters and info to become self-sufficient in the crimes victim unit. There will be a waiting list for housing and or financial assistance. I know its not what they want to hear but you cannot save the world. Its hard being in a abusive relationship and scared to lose your children but you never what will happen when he gets in a rage and is out of control. I would do what ever it took to survive, I would get rid of anything that I could to make it to the next day.I am not one that will take a handout but I will if I had my child involved. This is difficult call. Now I would also look at the facts. Was there a child in the car or a dog? If there was not then it may also been a ploy to get free food. Its sad but people do it when they are desperate. Its a tough call. take care.

I feel bad about that. I have been stuck in many different situation and it ain't great. But sooner or later I would be leaving the relationship if by all means possible nothing is working. I don't mean to sound so crafty but I would be devising a plan to survive when I leave the guy. I would be cutting down on home expenses and like you open a secret bank account, look for a part time job and start stashing basic appliances that me and my kids would be needing. i would also hunt work at home jobs in the internet at the same time and apply, because every penny counts. Then when everything is okay I would leave him without having any second thoughts and without batting an eyelash. But I would not leave right away when I cannot afford anything right away.

ok i wll sugest the person with these situation, that one should do its own. do what ever for yourself and don't try to depend on others. i wll encourage the person to be independent.

Not good to stay in a bad situation Here we have shelters for women if they have them there thats where she need to go till she can get out on her own!

Probably if you go to a shelter for abused women, they won't allow the dogs. Sad. Yeah, I could leave right now and be OK, I have a pretty good paying job. Many women aren't so fortunate.

Hi, dloveli. Great discussion! I have hardly any money saved up right now. I may have up to $80.00 if I was to ever leave... I would not make it without any money but I would make it with God. I will just go and stay with my grandmother like I always would do. I don't have any money that would help me to survive. Maybe with food, I will, but not cash.

Yes I would be ok, I may be a bag lady but I could get along. It was not always that way, when I had small children I first faced the fact that I might have to raise them alone, once I thought about that I realized that I can do what ever is necessary to survive and protect my kids. Now I have no one who depends on me and so it would just be me but I'm a survivor. I think about the terrible earthquakes and those who have lost everything, as long as I was unhurt I would be out there helping where I could, by doing something outside of myself I know I would survive.

I am in same boat ya it sucks. I dont have any answers to how to deal with it but a secret bank account sounds like a good idea. I have been working towards things to be able to leave someday but it honestly looks like i will need to wait it out till my children are adults. Maybe thats for the best anyway but it does seem like my life with be almost over by the time they all are adults so im not happy about that. I know my day will come when i wont have to live with all the issues i do today. I wish more people could get out of bad situations but financially its always going to be an issue in the world. If i didnt have children involved it would be much easier to just pick up and leave. I think its so important to wait for the right relationship before you get married and have children because if you just jump into it when youre young you may wake up years later and say that was the biggest mistake of my life and now theres no way out.

Hello Dloveli! This is a sad situation. I dont think anyone should live in a relationship when its not a happy one anymore. Why not go to family or friends? Why not go to a woman's shelter where they take you and your kids and your dogs. I dont think one needs money to run away. So many woman's organizations will do all they can to help women stuck in such situations. Even dangerous ones when they are being threatened by their husbands. They also have them for men now......?!?!? I left my ex after 6 months because I didnt like what he was turning into after the wedding....didnt even think a second about where Id go. I had lots of places to go to but it turns out HE was the one to leave at my request. I feel really bad and sad to think that in this day and age, with all the help out there that women still think they have nowhere to go.