long distance relationship

India
March 15, 2010 7:12am CST
Just some months back i was in luv with this beautiful girl....but she broke up with me saying that we r distance apart n we dint have time to spent together!!! but wht i was thinking is that is distance really the need in luv!!! couples leaving together for many years even got divorced!!! what's there case?? is the distance too short?or what do u guys think on how to keep long distance relationship longer!!! or is it impossible??i'd appreciate ur thoughts guys!!!
1 person likes this
12 responses
• United States
15 Mar 10
Any relationship can fail long distance or living in the same house. Relationships take alot of work no matter what. Long distance relationships certainly have their one set of problems too.. maybe even taking more work than other types of relationships. I have been in a long distance relationship over 3 years now. I think the most important part of a long distance relationship is the communication. We use several forms of communication to make sure each other is involved in the others life on a every day basis even at a distance. We use instant messengers, cellular phones, wifi on cellular phones and virtual worlds to stay connected no matter where we are in the world even 100's of miles apart. Another thing to consider is if you pick to have a long distance relationship is it will take an extreme amount of trust because you are so far apart. Any relationship will suffer if you dont have trust.
1 person likes this
• Romania
15 Mar 10
I totally agree with you, communication is the most important, I prefer video chat when possible, and voice chat otherwise :)
@jrocas05 (114)
• Philippines
16 Mar 10
I agree that it takes more work than other types of relationship. So, I think it is better not to get into one. I don't even think it is a relationship at all. I think it is a fantasy that two people create because it doesn't actualy go through the process. It's just stuck with getting to know level and then that's it. You think that you know the person but you don't; you just create it inside your head- the possibility that she or he is the person of your dreams.
@myl0t1 (346)
• Indonesia
15 Mar 10
Hi Mohodang, In my opinion, it's possible to keep relationship longer until you get married with your girl friend. The important thing in relationship is Commitment, Commitment does not know distance, time and situation as long as both of couple keep promise the commitment. Be positive thinking and give attention. Couple must be aware that distance relationship is susceptible. However, if it's true love i think both of you never broken heart. If you love her and she love you. You keep your feeling for her and she does too. My friend have experience like this and they ware success until get married and today they are in happy family. Regards.
@ada8may21 (2419)
• Philippines
16 Mar 10
Hello good evening to all, being in a long distance relationship is not really easy it takes lots of works to consider. I guess being committed to your partner is not enough. Because there are some couples who is committed/engaged however after a year they still broke up. I guess that secret ingredients to work out in a long distance relationship will not also applicable for some. Thats what I think, i'll be in a long distance relationship soon. I dont know and no idea how will i handle this one, but I try to be more understanding as possible. I know being understanding is not enough. But I will strenghten my patience, I also trust him so much. Ohh I just dont know how this will work out. I hope that long distance relationship was not created. By the way who invented it?
@vaneme (2)
16 Mar 10
time is important to couples, long distance relationship is the hardest part of your ralationship.. you guys really need to spent time with each other, to know the wants, the likes, dislikes and other matter.and when there is also lack in communication, that makes relationships fall apart.
1 person likes this
@mhaibless (210)
• United States
16 Mar 10
Hi.. I can relate to you. My boyfriend is living in half of the world. Its a long distance love affair. We always find a way to communicate. We are always making something new when we are sharing updates about each other. Distance makes the heart grow fonder. It really works if you are willing to be united in every moment of your life, being together in good times and bad times.
• Romania
15 Mar 10
Well, it depends on each person, it's not a rule, first off all you need to have a way to communicate, to stay in touch, for example I find video chat the best. I have a girlfriend like anyone else and distance is not an issue, but I am also in a strange, I won't call it relationship nor pen pal, but something in between, we never meet face to face, just over the internet via video chat, voice text and such, and we know each other better than most of our friends does really, I tell my girlfriend, friends and family, that she is a girl who I practice Japanese with because they wouldn't understand and consider me crazy, not to mention what my girlfriend would think... We are just having fun over the net, but I would definitely like to meet her. In conclusion, I would say that any relationship that isn't based on the physical aspect of it, can last years and years, but as we all know 99 percent of them are just for that reason. In hope you guys won't consider me crazy, I wish you all a lovely day !
@dr0czh (53)
• China
16 Mar 10
Hi,I am sorry to hear that.All of my friends have the same point that couples will part because of the long distance.I kown why, i have such exprience.when my BF and i live in different places due to the work,i feel lonely,i wanna someone with me,take care of me when i was seek,i wanna talk to him when i was happy and sadly.But he was not there .It was hard time for us.I almost give up because i donnot think i can get through with this.Lucky is we live together soon.
• Romania
17 Mar 10
Try becoming independent then all your problems will be gone, that's the best advice anyone can give to a girl, do not depend on anyone when you have problems, sometimes they might not be there, but you must keep going alone. That's what I think...
• Bulgaria
16 Mar 10
To keep long distance relationship,you must have enough money(for transport) and free time.If you regularly meet your beloved,you should have a stable relationship.
@skysuccess (8882)
• Singapore
16 Mar 10
mohondang, I am sorry that your relationship did not work out but let me share my $0.02 worth here. The greatest distance is often not that of the physical distance, but rather, it's the emotional distance between you and her. If your relationship crumbles - it's probably too fragile within to survive in the harsh reality of Love. IMHO, even if she is just next block away from you, it will still fail. In any relationship don't always expect things to fall nicely in place when you fall in love. Like any other aspects of your life - if you don't put in the effort to upkeep and make it better, it will just perish gradually. Likewise for your other half, too. Relationship is always and about mutual exclusive. Don't always hope for the best possible situation and the best possible mate - it never happens. Our relationship are always imperfect - because we are imperfect ourselves. Remember, we grow from imperfection and struggles, so as to polish our personality and character.
@trisha27 (3498)
• United States
16 Mar 10
In my case, I met my husband and we were not living in the same city. But he made it a point to come and spend every weekend with me and be with me. I believe though that it doesn't matter how far apart you are from a person that you are with. It still requires alot of work. It is even a more harder relationship to work on when the person that you are dating lives far apart. Maybe she is feeling that you haven't spent much time with her, is the reason for her comment of breaking up. Long distance relationships are even harder, they are really hard, and in order to make them work, it definitely require alot of work. Its not as hard to work on when you are with someone who is in the same city as you. Then you are able to practically able to spend alot more time with that person.
@chabawel (330)
• Philippines
16 Mar 10
It's hard for two people in love to stay in love together while being far apart. Because, your trust and faith for each other will be tested over and over again. And for a girl, you need to understand, to endure the emotional and mental torture of staying in the relationship is hard.
@sunkernjs (219)
• Philippines
16 Mar 10
Distance doesn't matter as long as trust, respect and love is present in both parties. Relationship isn't about destiny. We write our destiny. People choose to be forever because they choose to be together forever despite the problems. It's not destiny or even in a short or long term relationship.
@LadyBoss (253)
• United States
16 Mar 10
I think that its hard for girls to be in long distance relationships. Thats because we need alot of attention. And if girls dont get that then they feel lonely.