mending old friendships?
April 5, 2010 8:58pm CST
bumping into an old friend made me think about my old group of friends. it was not exactly falling out, more like "lost touch' with me but i guess to them it was falling out. it's just "sad" because they have been my elementary/high school circle though in college we each had separate groups. initially we saw each other once a year during the holidays then it suddenly stopped. i thought it was just that everyone was busy but then i found out that they continued to meet without me knowing it. i asked about it, but their reply was unexpected. main reason they gave me was that i stopped hanging out with them and preferred to be with my college group. how will i hang out with them though if they stopped inviting me, how would i know there were get togethers, right? they probably FB'ed all of our batch mates except me. now the friend i ran into told me things can still be mended. i'm still trying to find a reason to touch base but for now i am really happy with my group of friends. would you guys touch base for old times sake? or just move on?
• United States
6 Apr 10
If they are truly people that you want to maintain a friendship with, then reach out. Sometimes there are misunderstandings that end friendships. In your case, it sounds like there was one that you weren't even aware of. It doesn't hurt to mend fences. You can never have too many friends. That said, if you're perfectly happy with things the way they are now, and you haven't missed having any of these people in your life, you have to decide if it's worth it to put in the effort. It sounds like the friend that you ran into is interested in being friends again. If not, why would he/she even mention the possibility of mending things? The question is, is it worth it to you?
6 Apr 10
hi abbey212 thanks for your reply. actually, the old friend i rant into was not part of our "group" though her group is friends with us. you're right, i have to decide first if it's worth the effort. actually, i hate to admit it but now, i only think of them when they pop into a conversation. an yeah, you can never have too many friends. maybe what's important though to know is if they are for keeps. for me, there really was nothing on my side, no intentions to hurt or make issues. thats why i was really surprised at their reply before. but if all else fails, gotta move on, and i have no problem doing so. i guess they did already anyways.
6 Apr 10
Well life is full of mysteries they say and sometimes we hate them. I myself don't want a friend who keeps me, but maybe a friend who will hug me when I'm sad will be alright. The quote "everything is in a state of flux" says it all. People change in many ways and most of them will. Maybe in grade school they act embarrasing and now you're in college. They want to act cooler than you as if they'ved change a lot. Maybe I got a wrong opinion but people change a lot nowadays.