Pain decreases love.Do you think this is true?

April 6, 2010 11:55am CST
Love they say is unconditional.They say love is giving, it doesn't require something in return.But in times when pain or hurtful things comes in between love.Do these two things have the power to decrease the love so full?I want to know from you friends if what happens to you when you love most and then that receiver of your love tend to hurt you? What will you do then?
7 responses
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
6 Apr 10
Sweetie, love really hurts, that i can promise you. The more you hurt, the more you love that person. Sometimes it makes you really sick. But, as we are human, we need all that love gives, whether pain or happiness. No matter, we take it all. TATA.
6 Apr 10
Oh!The more you hate the more you love.You know aphrina, i used to believe in that saying when I was in high school.Pretending to hate but actually loving.Though now that I already matured so to say, then that saying just can't have the power over me anymore. perhaps I'm just tired already.
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
6 Apr 10
What did you do with my Dragonangel?? Give.
6 Apr 10
Making me spit fire I guess!(smiles)
• Philippines
7 Apr 10
Yes, love is unconditional so do you think that even if how much you are hurting, you will be more than willing to accept and endure it because you will make the relationship stronger. It is by hurting that you love the person even more and learn to take some more risks. On the other hand it really depends how you take the pain. But in my case, we've been through a lot and it feels so much better after all the hurting, we're still together and we are so in love with each other. Loving doesn't mean that you have to expect something in return if you truly believe that love is unconditional. So bottom line is that, it should not be a reason to decrease the love and what you and your partner has established.
7 Apr 10
Unconditional love is heavenly so to say. It can make the love even stronger as other people may say. I could take that perhaps if maybe during the course of the relationship either one or the other failed. In that case, both of them could take turns enduring and forgiving.But what if the problem only comes from one person?How pitiful the other one would be who hasn't done wrong and who really tried her best.Sooner or later,this person can't bear no more, this person can't give no more and finally this person can't just feel the love no more because all the pain has already crushed him or her.
• Philippines
8 Apr 10
Then if that is the case, then I believe that is not a two way relationship because it takes 2 to tango right? We all have our limits and if that is the case then the one giving and yet is hurting more has the right to exit the relationship and save the remaining dignity left in him.
• United States
7 Apr 10
Yes, the pain does decrease love, but only after several days when we start thinking logically. I mean the vary moment of getting hurt can leave us in a state of shock. During this period we might just be in a state of denial that something hurtful has come from the person we hold so close to our hearts. This is the time when we tend to ask ourselves if this is the reality or just a horrible nightmare. But once this time has passed the love in us decreases along with the respect for the partner. This is how I experienced things in the past. I saw that even my friend went through this. So I will say this happens in most cases to people. However, it is also true that love can be decreased from too much satisfaction in a relationship. I mean yes it is always recommended that we need to cherish the one who loves us. But in reality, the opposite happens. This love is taken for granted and the person is treated harshly. Too much love coming from the partner makes a person believe that he or she is still missing something. Perhaps, that is why some people break up.
7 Apr 10
That's right.You just have said it perfectly well that once a person whom you value much continuously hurt you, eventually,you will come to realize that this person isn't really worth the love you're giving which finally pushes you to realize that this someone just doesn't give a damn about you.This realization then makes you loose the love and the respect you've been giving all along.What a waste of love.
@kharlav (1672)
• Philippines
6 Apr 10
For me, pain either strengthens love or weakens it. Love strengthen when the person learns to endure and persevere despite of the pain; on the other hand, it weakens when the person grows tired and gives up because of the pain.
7 Apr 10
Yes,the end result might either be strengthening the love or loosing the love.But as most of us wouldn't or can't just endure repititive pain, then the latter result usually comes out.I myself doesn't want and can't take more and more pain as an exchange or consequence of the love which I'm giving to someone.I'm in no way a saint nor a martyr.I could give it up after some time.
• India
6 Apr 10
I don't think so because Love is a sweet pain. Pains and Hurtings make love Strong after they compramise with each other. They always result in increasing the Love but not decreasing the love.
6 Apr 10
Hello aravindraaz!You said it's a sweet pain.But how about if it's the same hurt repeatedly done? That leads to doubt the credibility of that partner.Am I right at that?
@unique16 (1531)
• United States
6 Apr 10
Hello dragonangel, I wish love was unconditional but I found most of the love I met there is conditions. I did my best in last relationship to be unconditional but got my hear broken the hard way. I learned my lesson. Haveing a child behind someone back by invetro to younger women by 20 years is not being unconditional to the other partner. This person said he saw us together forever... yea right. I know better now. I have lost a lot of trust in the male species over this. He is in the Army. If you can beelive someone in the Army who can you trust... (my opinions only) I know there are many women out there in love with someone in the service... I am happy for them but I seen the dark side of that family (bonding) band of brothers etc... Thanks and have a Great day Sincerely Unique16
6 Apr 10
I wish these band of brothers as you call them could learn to admire or appreciate the efforts being done and being poured out on them.Just I wish unique16.
• Philippines
6 Apr 10
Yeah, i think so. It kinda repels the person giving the loving if he/she is being hurt by that person whom he/she loves. I think it really decreases the intensity of loving someone if that person is being hurt by the one he/she loves.
6 Apr 10
It should be loving and giving right frontvisions? it shouldn't be a one way thing.It should have been fair for both parties.