what will you do if you find out that your bestfriend is in love with you?

Philippines
April 7, 2010 8:47am CST
Haiiiiiiiiist.. i really don't know how to handle things when it comes to him.. dpmt want to hurt him but... its so hard to compromise are friendship just because of his feelings for me..can anyone give me an advise?
1 person likes this
8 responses
• Philippines
11 Apr 10
In the way you phrased things, I assume that you don't love your bestfriend in a romantic way. If that's the case, then you should tell him that bestfriends are all you going to be and beyond that would not be possible. But if you love him in a romantic, you should give your love a chance to flourish and don't let your fears hinder you from being together as lovers. In my case, I fell in love with my bestfriend. The good news was we gave each other a chance, and now we're still together. There were rocky moments but our friendship helped us to hold on to each other. And I realized it's good to be in love with your bestfriend, although, it may hurt very much if it won't be very successful but then again, how would you know if you won't try. Risk a little. If things won't work out for you as lovers, I guess you would still want to be bestfriends at the end of the day. You have to choose what you really want and reflect on this. God Bless to you. :D
@zhelles (155)
• Philippines
9 Apr 10
Well, that's a pretty complicated stage but I guess the right way to handle it is to tell him how you feel. If you don't tell him, maybe it will be too late by then. So before it goes to that point, tell him that your friendship is very important to you and you treasure it dearly. :)
• Philippines
8 Apr 10
Well, feel like in a sky...i guess it is normal for us because we feel in love. Good for you that your bestfriend feels like that towards you, and for that it is easy for you to decide weather you will accept him or not because you know already his whole being right. So for me, know first your feelings towards him and then decide for good, do not even think that you friendship is a hindrance for both of you because it was not. Give it a try.
• United States
7 Apr 10
Situations like that are so hard. If you decide to let a relationship grow from that friendship, it can end in two ways. Either you have an amazing and fruitful relationship or it's terrible and you lose your relationship. More likely than not it doesn't end up well. I would tell your friend that you cherish your friendship too much to jeoprodize it.
• United States
7 Apr 10
Take it from someone who has been there before, it is a very hard decision to make. You may risk losing him forever if you follow your mind (if that's the part that is telling you "NO") and you may lose his friendship later on in life if you follow your heart (giving that is the part that is telling you "YES"). I will tell you this, an intimate relationship with someone who has been your bestfriend for a number of years may be the best thing in the world because noone knows you better than he/she does, however, that friendship can go sour when and if the relationship ends. Let him know how you truly feel and explain to him the importance of his friendship. Be honest with him...if he is truly your friend he should understand. At the end of the day, sustaining the friendship you have now is worth more than the risk of seeing if a relationship will work or not. Don't risk what you have because you can never get it back. Good luck and be blessed!
@1anurag1 (3580)
• India
7 Apr 10
yes this is really a very critical state and there is no direct and easy way to handle. i think i could suggest you one way. that you could say to your friend as yes i am your friend and feel you as my best friend but i really never think in this way. but i would love to share you the feeling in my heart. this time i dont have any feeling for you as you have but may be in future i could have also. so please dont mind.
• Philippines
7 Apr 10
Hi elahtica,I know that it's very difficult to be in that situation especially if he is not just a friend but your bestfriend..Yes it is really hard to compromise your friendship but the question is, do you have feelings for him as well? or is it just him,if you do feel the same way,& you both don't have anyone,then maybe you could give it a try and if incase it is just him who feels that way then the right thing to do is tell him,as much as you don't want to hurt him, you will hurt him more by not telling the truth. I do understand your view in this because i have been in that situation too, the only difference is that we are both in a relationship & i only see him as bestfriend nothing more than that, so i told him honestly & it really affects our relationship at first but it's worth trying because now we are still bestfriends! Hope you get the courage to tell him....Goodluck dear!
@avani26 (1521)
• India
7 Apr 10
I feel that you should tell him about your feelings because it is always better to tell them about it in the first place instead of giving him wrong signals.