Why do friends not reply to you

@manleyjoe (1599)
United States
April 9, 2010 8:36am CST
Have you ever noticed that sometimes when you take the time to add to your friends discussion they never come back and read what you have to contribute? I have some of my friends that never start a discussion but then several who do. Of the ones that start discussions some will come back and add comment to what you have replied to their discussion some will not. I one on my friend list that has a lot of good discussions started but then when you respond to him he never comes back to answer your comment, why is this? I have sent message to this person but he never responds, is maybe he just wants to flood the discussion board with comments? Would you ever do this to your friends? I hope that I never do.
8 people like this
11 responses
@akuler (3539)
• Malaysia
9 Apr 10
Hi manleyjoe, I did not care if my friends did not give their response to my discussion since I rarely started one and it is usually about football and I believe most of my friends here either did not have the knowledge about it or they did not have any interest on it. We can not force someone to join our discussion when they had nothing to say. But, whether they were on my friends list or not here, whenever they give their response to my discussion, I would leave my comment on that. maybe not immediately but within a considerable time. When we talk about discussion, it mean two way communication. It is an interaction between two or more people and it is longer communication then ask and question type of communication. When we involved in the discussion, we need to say something about the topics, to agree or disagree and give our points. If or when someone reply to our points, we need to reply it back with more points or information. This process going on and on until we reach some point. We have a lot of people who knows and understand the meaning of discussion here at myLot. But there is also a few that never come back to their discussion after posting it. And I do not know exactly why they started the discussion because if they were looking for money then they did the wrong approach and if they are looking for a friends then they hurt their friends feelings.
2 people like this
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
9 Apr 10
Thank you for that. Your last paragraph says all that I was trying to say, thanks. I don't respond many times to a lot of discussions but those that I do respond to is because I have feelings about and want to establish a dialog with that writer.
3 people like this
@akuler (3539)
• Malaysia
9 Apr 10
Some of us here actually does not know the meaning of discussion. They thought it is a question and answer only. When someone started a discussion, they should have a courtesy to reply back to their responder. They should at least say thank you for responding to their discussion (even though it is a no no according to the guidelines here). But at least we tell the responder that we read and appreciate their time and thought about our discussion. It is better if they could add something to the discussion and make it a bit longer.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164670)
• Garden Grove, California
10 Apr 10
akuler and manley I like it better if instead of saying thanks they talk to me then I can talk back,then someone else comes and talks to us both and its now a real discussion. we all learn a bit about each other and that makes my lot really enjoyable to me.
1 person likes this
@mysdianait (64059)
• Italy
9 Apr 10
I think some of them do not really know the meaning of 'discussion' and they confuse this site with other sites that are for questions and answers. MyLot tell us that we earn for discussions so they are losing out when they do not comment. I have several on my friend list too and they start so many topics that they could never possibly keep up weith the comments too I comment to those who respond on my discussions, even if it a response that arrives years after the discussion was first posted. They deserve something for their efforts and I comment back just like I would to anyone who spoke to me offline too.
1 person likes this
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
9 Apr 10
That is what I am talking about. You have explained it in terms that I had not realized before thank you
2 people like this
@mysdianait (64059)
• Italy
9 Apr 10
I find that by commenting on the responses, even on those on other discussions, it is so much more interesting and fun too. I have got to know many Lotters just because I went and commented on their response, then they came back and I did too and then it went on and on and on. That is what a discussion is about too.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164670)
• Garden Grove, California
10 Apr 10
hi diana oh yes I find that at times I get so excited about commenting on the responses of others to my discussion that I have not posted to any of my friends discussions yet, but I love to let my friends know that I appreciate all their responses and will answer all of them, I have fun doing it too. I like it when they comment on my comment and someone else chimes in and we are having a real gabfest, thats a lot of fun.
@KrauseHome (35025)
• United States
25 Jul 11
Well there for a long time I was lucky if I ever came back and rechecked the discussions that I have started here, and actually probably missed out on keeping some great discussions going as well. Now even if I am quite behind with some of my discussions I am trying to keep up here where I can and hope people are understanding with me when it takes time.
1 person likes this
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
25 Jul 11
If we don't come back and finish then we are missing out easy earnings. I find some are so busy starting new discussions they never come back to see that you have added some content or maybe asked a question.
1 person likes this
@KrauseHome (35025)
• United States
27 Aug 11
Well many times I was probably one that people felt was this way. But I have been keeping more on top of things just to let people know I care about what they are saying here for sure. I might be behind but I do come here to comment.
• India
10 Apr 10
This is true that people wont respond nor reply to our discussions. The reason may be they would have missed to read our discussions, else they dont wish to reply.Anyways we should not get discouraged by these acts instead try to give some interesting topics.
1 person likes this
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
25 Jul 11
Not our discussions, you didn't get it, what I was referring to was when we respond to their topic with a comment or question they seem to be to busy starting new discussions and don't have time to finish the ones they have already started. Maybe they just don't know it is easier to keep one going and they earn more than to start a new one.
@bluemars (952)
• Australia
10 Apr 10
For me I am not quick to judge I mean there are many reason for this. We can not know someone's life or their schedule or what they are doing so they may have reasons for not replying that are innocent to say the least. I allow people to contribute whenever they are capable or want to. I mean I won't get upset if anyone does not feel the need to respond to a discussion. I mean they may not be interested in the topic at hand and that is okay because we can't always like to talk about some of the things that your friends want to discuss and I think that is purely because we are so different like that.
1 person likes this
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
10 Apr 10
I did not meant of sound judgmental but apparently form all the comments that are coming I did, for that I am sorry. If I start a discussion it does not matter if no one responds. If I respond to a discussion then I am trying to keep this discussion going. But so many of friends start a discussion then never come back to see if anyone cares enough to enter into it.
@dr9rim (247)
• Australia
9 Apr 10
i think people should feel like what you feel when their responses seem to be ignored. because i would write responses to those who i think has given an opinion (making sense or not doesn't matter). if it's just a 'yes same here' without any elaboration, i normally would just skip it. otherwise, i'll try to say something. i hope to make them feel ignored and hopefully think that they should write a better response next time.
1 person likes this
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
10 Apr 10
But maybe that one who just said same here needs a little more encouragement to bring out some profound message. "discord begets discord"
1 person likes this
@qamarep (4450)
• Pakistan
9 Apr 10
yes this happened to me many times.. may be they are busy in their lives more to be here
1 person likes this
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
10 Apr 10
We are all busy in our own way but I still like to talk with people, how else are we to make new friends? If I have enough time to start something I will take the time to finish it.
1 person likes this
@vine88 (1038)
• India
9 Apr 10
hi manley.... i reply according to the question...if i like the question then i will like to reply... and i wiill also reply who answer my post..i will take and read all the replies from the friends.. (one love, one earth, one god, many religion)
1 person likes this
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
9 Apr 10
That is what I am talking about taking the time to thank someone for taking the time to say something. Thanks for your comments.
2 people like this
• Philippines
9 Apr 10
maybe they are just busy with other topic thats why, besides they also might also have other friends to look with. just dont feel bad about it. imagine how many hundred of thousand we have here. what matter is you post your discussion and you post your response.
1 person likes this
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
9 Apr 10
That is right I just take things to personal I guess. It does not bother me that no one responds to my discussions, but if they do I will reply to their comment even if it is to say thanks for your opinion. I owe them that for taking the time to reply to my post.
2 people like this
• Philippines
10 Apr 10
Don't worry, you are not the only one here who happens to experience that. But just think that people do come and go. Some may have the notice on emails, others don't set it as an option so they don't even know if you have started a discussion. Some may have seen your topic, but probably can't relate to the topic. There are many reasons to think off but don't get sad. Just continue on and post topics and reply also to other member's topics here. As you go along here in Mylot, you will experience more. So just brace yourself for more and don't get yourself so frustrated on what they do. Happy Mylotting.
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
10 Apr 10
Thank you, that is well put, wish I had the gift of words like that. I guess I am just too blunt and say what I think and don't sugarcoat it. I hurt a lot of feelings I guess. I just wonder sometimes if people really care about their discussion or are just putting words out to make money. I had not thought of it in that way, not having the notify turned on that is.
@Hatley (164670)
• Garden Grove, California
10 Apr 10
hi manleyjoe I had some of the same complaints when I first came here and an older user told me some good advice,just keep posting and getting your name in our faces so we will say hey manley is a really great responder, I must look up this persons discussions and respond back. now add these people to your friends list and soon you will be having a lot of responses and you can comment back and your earnings will really pick up.hugs from hatley.sometimes some friends just do not respond but you will find other friends who will be real friends and will respond to you so give us all a chance, good luck and God bless.
@manleyjoe (1599)
• United States
10 Apr 10
The money is nice but I really like to talk and make new friends more. I am not real good at expressing myself either so I sometimes leave people thinking one thing when I meant something different.