Do hate your sibling?

Philippines
April 19, 2010 8:16pm CST
I realized that my sister hates me or I her. Either way, we don't get along that well. Every time we bump into each other, I don't know what happens but we'd end up clawing at each other (figuratively of course). When I was a child,I used to follow her around a lot. I was younger than her by a year. I actually thought we were twins. When we were in high school she just changed. She seldom talked to me anymore. Or if she did I always regretted it because we'd end up fighting over simple things. Pretty silly. I thought it would all change after the burst of teenage hormones. SO far however, nothing has changed. IT is like we have both decided not to be good to each other. Although looking back I think, my reaction was a defensive one. But I'll never know. It is just sad that someone I grew up with can't tolerate me. (What does it say about me? Am I that hideous?) Sad. Are you close to your brothers and sisters? I really envy you. YOu have a good thing going there.
2 people like this
21 responses
@ada8may21 (2419)
• Philippines
20 Apr 10
I hate my brother because he is being selfish now since he got married. Come to think of it, his family is staying in our house. They dont have work and they are not earning for a living they just being dependent to our parents. The only they could do is just to help us in our household chores. But no they are not doing it, in fact they are just getting food in our house then bring it over to their room and if the food is ready get just come out and get and eat inside their room. I just feel disappointed why he is like that. I dont want to argue him about what they are acting now, because I dont have the right. I want my parents to do it, but of course my parents cant do it.
• Philippines
24 Apr 10
I really can empathize with you. I know how it is to be frustrated with someone you love. Looks like we are part of that "some" who can't really stand our siblings right now.
@siliguri (4051)
• India
20 Apr 10
Nope! i don't hate them at all..after all we have blood relations..then there is no way i hate my brothers or sisters..yeah! some time the stuff done by them make me irritate but after few minutes all become all right...I love them very much..they are only who comes when you in problem no one else...
• Philippines
24 Apr 10
I do believe that if everything fails you can always turn to your family. Theoretically, that is. But right now, with my sister, it's everyone else before her. Frustrating really because we used to be close.
@lelin1123 (15645)
• Puerto Rico
20 Apr 10
I'm the oldest of five and we all don't get along as I wish we did. When I see sisters getting along nicely I get so upset because I don't have that with one of my sisters. One sister we get along the other is a cold heartless person that I don't or can't relate to at all. I really can't believe she grew up in my parents home. So its definitely not the loving family that I wish I had but I do get along with the rest of my family.
• Philippines
24 Apr 10
I wish that too with my sister. With other siblings I get along well. It's quite surprising that she doesn't like me that well because all her friends tell me she's the greatest friend they ever had. I can't see that from her with me. Oh well...
• Philippines
20 Apr 10
Hello there abitcurious, I am very close to my siblings...i'm the middle child & always the negotiator of the family....Some said it's because of the age gap...my sis is 5 yrs older than me...& my brother is 3 yrs younger.I think it's the way our parents brought us up,we are like friends and we were treated the same/equal by our parents...no favorites...and my friend don't envy us...maybe you just need to talk more to your sister...open up to her & try to remember your childhood days...have a great day!!!
• Philippines
24 Apr 10
Hi shenlynn, HEy me too! I'm a middle child so I really rarely be part of any disputes. I know, I need to talk to her. Right now, it doesn't seem to be working for us. The times that we seldom find the time to talk we end up not getting along at all. It's quite sad. I wish it's really a phase like everyone says. No doubt though, I really love my sister.
@npadecio (161)
• Philippines
20 Apr 10
Hi abitcurious. I can relate to your post. My brother and I used to be like best friends ever. We were so close that we would hang out almost the whole day, everyday. This has changed when I beat him in a computer game called Mortal Combat. He got pissed and his ego reacted I guess, beating him badly by his younger brother. He made things really personal and we fought that night. The healthy relationship changed in an instant. We haven't spoken for about 2 years if I can still remember it right. After which, we just spoke and forget what happened 2 years ago with Mortal Combat. We were grown up, too, so both of us matured already that petty things like that should no longer be entertained. Thought we're not as close as before, we're doing great as brothers and can approach anytime we wish. Oh by the way, I have 5 big brothers and he's the 4th one. In your case, I think you guys should get this over with because, we're not getting any younger. We should enjoy one another's companion or at least not to clash between your sister. Find the right moment/timing to clear this up, and I'm sure you guys will be in good terms in no time. :)
• Philippines
24 Apr 10
Yeah I guess you're right. We're just in a phase where everything seems to poke a sensitive spot.
@bwaybaby (904)
• United States
20 Apr 10
Sometimes siblings just don't get a long for a while. I'm sure it'll get better. My sister and I both don't really remember talking to each other when I started high school. We were both busy and had different interests. We get along much better now, although that's most likely due to the fact that we don't see each other too often now, even though we go to college in the same city. My boyfriend and his sister don't get along very much at all. He's 23 and currently lives at home and she's almost 17. I've been there for some major fights. It just happens sometimes. I hope you and your sister get along soon... It just takes time sometimes.
• Philippines
20 Apr 10
Maybe we're in that phase were we can't tolerate each other. I seldom pick fights with anyone. Really seldom. But in our case, everything seems to be getting in our nerves rather easily.
@dbeast (1499)
• India
20 Apr 10
This is totally normal.Most of the brothers and sisters are the same way.No matter how they behave or what they do to hurt us deep inside they have love for us.I have seen it in my case.My brother always used to fight with me and trust me we used to fight like it was world war 3 but when I need someone to turn to and need help he is always there to help and protect me.There is nothing thicker than blood.
• Philippines
20 Apr 10
I guess its because we love our siblings more that it hurts so much when we choose to be really negative each other. COme to think of it. IF someone wants to learn how to really hurt me the best people to ask would be family. Thanks for this insight. Now I feel a bit relieved.
• United States
20 Apr 10
hello there abitcurious I know for a fact some family members can never get along no matter what happens. For me it is the opposite me and my brothers get along perfectly we are actually thinking of starting an only business together. Ever since we were little we would have each others back we were the trio if you messed with one of us you would be ganged up on by the ly foundation (= So all i got to say is family is 1st
• Philippines
20 Apr 10
You're really lucky to have friended your family like that. IT's nice to know that it will workout for someone else. Hey good luck on your business!!! I do hope it does well.
@smileonstar (4013)
• United States
20 Apr 10
HI, wow, hating sister or brother is not a good thing to do. I know sometime you can't handle her but at least she is your sister... Is that something you can talk about ? let sit down and talk about it... sometimes, she might feel something not right about you or you dont feel right about her. I never hate anyone in my family cuz I think it is just awful to do. I grown up with them and I want to keep it that way... so sorry to hear that but you should talk to her
• Philippines
20 Apr 10
I know we really should talk. I tried a lot of times, I mean really a lot. But we have no patience between us anymore, we always end up hurting each other and in the end, it was more easier for me just to shut up when she comes to visit. I have another sister and we did not go through this phase at all. So I'm shocked why this happened.
• United States
26 Apr 11
Yeah, I hate one of my sisters. She's a year younger than me but she's the total opposite from me. Our personalities do not match at all. On the other hand, I love my baby sister... she's 3 days away from turning 1 year old!
@avilev (1)
• United States
20 Jun 10
Hi, Its a matter of age,time and family condition. We were our biggest enemies with my brother until I was 15, from 15 to 30 we were just regular people, nothing specila, after 30 we became friends... When parents are gone...only real love remains from sisters/brothers... So one day, you'll be friend anyway, shorten that period and don't loose further time, print this blog,present her through a family member both you trust and make piece. Good luck,
@sacmom (14316)
• United States
23 Apr 10
No, I don't hate my sibling. We just don't get along (her choice). It's pretty much always been that way. It basically started once I hit first grade (my sister was in 3rd at that point). Yep, it started early. It only went downhill the older we got. Oh sure, we had moments where we got along, though it never lasted long. By the time we were teenagers my sister wanted nothing to do with me, so I basically kept away from her... After she and our mom had a falling out, my sister moved out of our mom's. Neither of us saw my sister again for 11 years. Surprisingly she (my sister) came to my boys' birthday party back in 2001. And even though my sister and I didn't get along in the past I was still happy to see her. She is my sister, after all. Well, that all changed after I said hello to her. She snubbed me just like she used to, like nothing changed between us. So that was the end of me talking to her that day. I haven't seen her since. That was almost 9 years ago. I did get in contact with her (by phone) last year, I think, for our mother's sake. But I think it was a wasted effort on my part. Oh well, on a positive note we had the longest conversation we've had in years. It lasted a whole minute, and that is not an exaggeration on my part. LOL Well, if my sister ever wants a relationship with me she knows where to find me. It's up to her. It is sad that some siblings can't get along. But that's just the way it goes sometimes, I suppose. Happy mylotting!
@junrapmian (2170)
• Philippines
21 Apr 10
When we were kids, yeah, I hate my eldest brother and my youngest sister. Maybe because I was envious of them. They were the ones to get the big share of anything. They were the ones to always have new things. While me on the other hand will be shared with what is left on the table which is always the smallest share. Even as to the the attention that my mother gives us, they have the most. And what is more sad for me was that, I am always the errand person in and out of the house. I have to do all the chores like cleaning the house, washing the dishes, washing our clothes, do this and do that while the two of them are busy playing outside or watching TV. I really hate them and my mother. It's good that I am my father's pet and I have someone to confide to when I cry. But that was long ago, I have learned to accept the fact that it really happens. Now that we all have our own families, we have learned to get along well, just forget the past.
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
20 Apr 10
I've been blessed in the fact that I've always been very close to both my brother and my sister. We were all three very young when we lost our father and I think that experience in our lives has served the purpose of making us have a stronger relationship with each other. There was a short period of time where I couldn't get along with my baby sister, but as we've all gotten a little bit older, we have come together to the point that we now depend on each other to get things done in our lives. It is great to have the support system that I have from them.
@lingli_78 (12846)
• Australia
20 Apr 10
no i don't actually... i love my siblings and i don't have any reason to hate them... although i seldom keep in touch with them nowadays because we live far apart, but i still love them... anyway, blood is still thicker than water and i can't just cut my relationship with them or hate them for whatever reasons... take care and have a nice day...
@maikeruk (406)
• Germany
20 Apr 10
what i see is that is normal in the relationship between siblings up to the age of 20 or so... once the family separate a bit and get older for some reason families become closer...
@dawnald (84131)
• Shingle Springs, California
20 Apr 10
I get along with all of mine, but some of my mom's brothers and sisters don't get along. yeah, it's sad, but it doesn't always work out between siblings. Maybe if you made some kind of a peace effort toward her?
@jambi462 (4598)
• United States
20 Apr 10
I don't hate my sibling at all and actually think that he is much cooler and smarter then a lot of people that are my age or older. I think that throughout the years growing up myself and my mom did a good job of teaching him to be himself and not do the things that everyone else does to impress each other. I'm glad that I helped him to reach this discovery early in life because it will allow him to find himself and what he wants to do earlier then I did and perhaps have a better chance of success at what he wants to do. I hope that you and your sister can smooth things out in the future because we were given the family members we grew up with for a reason and we should try to find the beauty in them at all times even if it can be hard at times.
@monkeylong (3147)
• Guangzhou, China
20 Apr 10
As far as I am concerned, I think I like my sibling so much in my daily life. In my opinons, they the close relastionship of mine.For me, I usually keep in touch with my sibilings as often as possible ,which I think can have a lot of help to keep us in good relationship.When any one of us has some difficulties in our daily life, then the others will try their best to help the one in trouble. I am very glad I have so good sibling.
@gracie04 (4555)
• Philippines
20 Apr 10
No. I love my sister, i really do. we get along very well. we have the same taste when it comes to latest gadgets, fashion, food, movies, travel and many more. we share secrets too. i know that she has a boyfriend and she knows i have one as well. i always give her advices everytime she needs a helping hand. when i have extra cash, i always give her something. for instance, face shop nail polish, cute shirt, cover/housing for her mobile phone or itouch, handkerchief, load, etc... sometimes, i treat her to movies and restaurants. :)