Some times life just sucks, you know?

Regina, Saskatchewan
May 1, 2010 10:36pm CST
I am throwing in the towel. I have lost my mind. Or at least my short term memory. So I appeal to the lot community to help me fill in the holes of my swiss cheese brain..... A fellow lotter is in trouble and needs help finding a place to live in the Santa Rosa, California area. A spare bedroom, paid for by the week (she works and is paid weekly), or even a corner of your garage.........at this point it doesn't matter. The important thing is that she get out NOW of the abusive household she is living in before she loses HER mind or worse. It won't be for long, only until the time it takes to find an apartment of her own. Nearly every day, I deal with online friends who need my help in one way or another. And I am always there for them. This time, I'M the one appealing for help. So if you live in the Santa Rosa area, know someone who does, or can give me links to places online I can go to to get information that will help my friend, I will be forever in your debt. So please people, talk to me. PM me, email me, whatever you are most comfortable with, and let's get our fellow mylotter resituated asap. Thank you. When was the last time you did more for a friend than just talked?
11 people like this
21 responses
@Hatley (164654)
• Garden Grove, California
2 May 10
hi sparkof insanity or sparky well I am in California but in the wrong area and too I have no corner of any thing as we became homeless when the vile manager evicted us because my son had lost his job so now I live in this tiresome retirement center and my son is a couple of miles away in a gov,sponsored apt with three other men who are all still looking for work.let me do some searching maybe I can get an idea. will make a comment here when I come back.
5 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
No worries sweets. But if you can find the name of the newspaper for Santa Rosa, that would be a great start. And if you can't, it's such a treat to know you tried and support what I'm trying to do. Big hugs to you Hatley.
4 people like this
@Hatley (164654)
• Garden Grove, California
2 May 10
sparks I found a one bedroom rental by this realestate co. called Santa Rosa Rentals on our mylot search bar and it was for five hundred dollars a month which is really low now days here in Ca anyplace, so she might try contacting on the internet this Santa Rosa rentals.com. hugs back and hope our mylot friend finds a place to stay.
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
Hatley you are a star and I hope that you earned some money using the mylot search bar! I will check the link out right away and pass it on to my friend. THANK YOU so much! And when the hubs and I get to California, you will be on my list to get you out of that retirement home for the best steak you've ever eaten!
4 people like this
@ElicBxn (60884)
• United States
2 May 10
I let a gal who was losing her house move in with us - there was more going on than just that, but lets just say she lost her place and then her job and then... well, she's still with us...
5 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
Is that a good thing or a worrisome thing Elic? I know that it's hard to judge these situations, but sometimes we just have to try, you know?
5 people like this
@ElicBxn (60884)
• United States
2 May 10
Its not a bad thing, the money she is now paying for rent helps out, and she does some of the cleaning that I'd not do nearly as good a job on. There are times we wish she'd do things differently, but that's life isn't it?
4 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
True, that's life. And as my gran would say, "Be grateful for small mercies" lol
4 people like this
@moondancer (7434)
• United States
2 May 10
I sure wish I still lived in California or knew people there so I could help out with this one. I have given people a place to stay many times. I have even went so far as to take my bill money and rent people a place to stay and never gotten the money back, but they got a place to live in. I have helped people pay their bills when they could not or just helped when people needed help. This is what we need to do when people need help. I wish I could help you with this person. If I come up with anything that can help this person I will certainly let you know as soon as I can! You are so kind to offer help to this person. Try not to obsess on this like I do though when someone needs help.
4 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
You and I were cut from the same mold Moonbeam......................love you to bits!
2 people like this
• United States
2 May 10
lol, I have thought of something...it's a bit far fetched but it might work. There is something here called freecycle it is run by yahoo. when people need something for free or are offering something for free they just post it on freecycle. You find the city near you and sign up. This person or someone will need to do it for them...Darn I forget the town. But say it's San Fransisco... type in freecycle.com/San Fransisco or something like that.... and when it comes up to sign up for it...get approved then put in what is being looked for...a place to stay for a lady that is in need. You have to put in the title Needed and in the body of the note Needed... that's it and keep posting everyday until what is needed is gotten.
3 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
Great idea Moon and I will pass it on. In fact, with all the links Oshy's posted, I'll just send my friend this whole thread! LOL Thanks heaps.
3 people like this
• United States
2 May 10
I don't know how to help, but I do have a question.. how do you trust everyone... please don't take this wrong I just watch and read alot about people not being who they say they are on the net
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
You've raised a good point Lilly. I guess trust depends on several things.... 1. Getting to know the person through private communication. 2. Knowing the kinds of sites they belong to and being a part of them too. 3. Going with my own life experience and what my gut tells me. 4. Time. Time and interaction and a building of trust and affection. I don't trust everyone I meet on the net. But I do trust my own judgement. And so far, touch wood, I've been very lucky that the people I've met on the net and made friends with have not let me down.
3 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
3 May 10
I agree with you completely Pat, and that's why we have to be very careful of what we believe and don't believe. One of the advantages of the net, is the ability to DO the research and get to the truth, or close enough to it to make in informed decision. But there is no tool better than age and experience...........
2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36489)
• United States
2 May 10
Good morning Sparks, I wish i was close enough to help her but u know i'm not. It is so kind of u to help her. Hope u get some good results. We all could do more to help people, that's for sure. I do offer my help alot but guess people think i'm doing well to look after myself which they may be right.lol. Have a good sunday. hugs.
4 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
3 May 10
Thanks for responding anyway Jo. It's always good to see you and you take care of yourself. Big hugs sweets.
2 people like this
@sid556 (31005)
• United States
2 May 10
Hi Sparks, I'm sorry but I would be of no help at all. I live on the other side of the country and I don't even have a bed myself. I'd offer some floor space but my daughter recently moved back in after breaking up with her boyfriend and she's using that with an air mattress. Just popped in to say Hi and let you know that I think you are one incredible person! This girl is very lucky to have you as a friend. I hope someone is here is able to help you and her out. I've been in such a relationship and one of the hardest parts of leaving is having a safe place to stay until you can get on your feet.
4 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
Gosh I've missed you Sid! And yeah.............leaving is the hardest, and feeling safe again takes time.
3 people like this
@LouRhi (1502)
• Australia
2 May 10
I wish that we lived close enough for me to be able to offer a space on my floor, if I had any more room than that it would be yours. I hope that someone is able to come through for you. Sending you lots of love, fairy wishes and butterfly kisses and hoping that you are able to escape sooner rather than later xx
4 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
You are so sweet Lou and it's so good to see you. Catching the butterfly kisses and feeling the love and fairy wishes....................Hugs.
2 people like this
• United States
3 May 10
Hi Sparks. I am sorry but I do not know anything about California..I think there should be a woman's shelter there that she could stay at till she finds an apartment or house..I wish your friend God's blessings and help with her situation.. Blessings and love to you sparks..
3 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
4 May 10
Thanks Martha. She has the link to this discussion, so hopefully she'll see your kind words. Hugs and love and blessings to you too sweets.
2 people like this
@paula27661 (15899)
• Australia
3 May 10
I’m afraid I am unable to help all the way from Australia. I do hope your friend finds a place really soon. When one is living in an abusive environment there is no time to waste, one needs to get out immediately. I hope you find someone who can help. I took care of my friend’s daughter for two weeks while her mother was having brain surgery. In some situations you know you just have to lend a hand… All the best for your friends, I’ll send her some prayers...Hope they help...
3 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
3 May 10
Prayers always help Paula. Thank you for yours.
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48716)
• United Kingdom
2 May 10
Well Spark I can not help there as you know I live nowhere near, but I really hope that someone will be able to help This is so sad and I really hope she can find somewhere Hugs
3 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
3 May 10
I hope so too Gabs. I'm so worried about her................hugs to you too.
1 person likes this
• Canada
2 May 10
Sorry, we have the room, but I am in Canada, so of no help there. You have the biggest heart, my dear, and are always a very valuable, loving, helpful friend to have in a pinch. Well, anytime, actually. Sending positive energy her way in hopes she gets somewhere quickly to get out of this abusive situation asap.
• Regina, Saskatchewan
3 May 10
Annie, you do have a way of making me. Big hugs to you.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84147)
• Shingle Springs, California
2 May 10
I don't live in Santa Rosa, but I hope she finds something soon. Got a friend staying with me until she can save for an apartment, guess that's helping...
2 people like this
@dawnald (84147)
• Shingle Springs, California
2 May 10
Santa Rosa paper: http://www.pressdemocrat.com/
2 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
Oh thanks so much Dawn. This is the link I really wanted...............good on ya!
3 people like this
@dawnald (84147)
• Shingle Springs, California
3 May 10
You is welcome...
1 person likes this
@zed_k4 (17627)
• Singapore
3 May 10
Hi sweets, hope you are alright. Abuse is something that shouldn't be tolerated and your desire to help your friend is really commendable..
• Regina, Saskatchewan
3 May 10
Well hello there my handsome friend! Good to see you. And you're right. NO kind of abuse should be tolerated and I really hope my friend gets the help she needs soon.................
1 person likes this
@zed_k4 (17627)
• Singapore
4 May 10
It's truly good to see you too, Sparks. My exact sentiments too..hoping that she will be free from all the abuse soon.
1 person likes this
@jerzgirl (8013)
• Gloucester City, New Jersey
2 May 10
Don't know what kind of abusive environment is she in? She do well to check out the YWCA's women's shelter. There are other women's shelters in the Santa Rosa area, if she's interested. They usually max out at 30 days, so that would help her find a place - some even have housing assistance where they help find a place for the women. It's worth checking out. Redwood Gospel Mission: The Rose Women's Shelter - www.srmission.org 1048 Wild Rose Drive, Santa Rosa - (707) 573-0490 Women's Emergency Shelter - www.ywca.org undisclosed location, Santa Rosa - (707) 546-7115 The last one is undisclosed because they don't want the abusers knowing where the shelters are. My ex knew where it was and showed up banging on the door. Someone else set off an explosive device in the dumpster out back, but they are generally safe and well connected with the police.
• Regina, Saskatchewan
3 May 10
Hey Jerz, long time no talk to. Good to see you. And thanks for the links. I've sent this whole discussion on to my friend, so she'll see them. Her situation is complicated and I don't want to go into here, but suffice to say, she needs to get out asap.
2 people like this
@jerzgirl (8013)
• Gloucester City, New Jersey
3 May 10
Have her contact the YWCA for sure - if they can't help, they'll know who can. She could even contact the police, unless that would make a bad situation worse. Then she'd have to wait until she's out.
1 person likes this
2 May 10
Hi sparky, Many years ago I ave helped a friend who was homeless, no fault of her own and she stayed at my place for a while till her boyfriend foud her a flat and there was any lad who styed at my hone for a while too till he found a place of his own, now he is married and have a home of his own with children but I have not heard of my other frined, lost touch with her, but she knows where I am, not heard from her for years. Love and hugs. Tamara
• Regina, Saskatchewan
3 May 10
It's sad to lose touch with people you've put yourself out for, but in my book the reward is in the doing and if contact is lost, then at least you can look back and say, "I did my best" and hopefully the person you helped is doing ok now.............hugs to you too sweets.
1 person likes this
@patgalca (14378)
• Orangeville, Ontario
2 May 10
I am a long way from California (Ontario, Canada) so couldn't possibly help if I wanted to. I have been in that situation though. I didn't get out. I was fortunate enough that he took off and never returned. That was a couple of weeks after a rather severe incident. The bruises were still visible when the police, who came to my house on an unrelated incident, had me examined by a doctor and recommended I press charges. I was told he could have killed me. The guy had said, "If I had a bullet I'd shoot you!" so I'm guessing they were right. I hope this person can find a place to go to. Are there no women's shelters? Even a church would be of assistance in situations like this, whether they are members or not.
2 people like this
@savypat (20246)
• United States
2 May 10
We went to court last week to help a friend stay out of jail. This time it worked. But I think he needs to be castrated to keep him away from the women he attracts who turn out to be leaches. A fool is a fool and I wish this one would quit thinking with his small head. He's such a nice guy. I wish I could help but all I knew in Santa Rosa have moved away, out of California. Surly they have a women's shelter there.
• Regina, Saskatchewan
3 May 10
Maybe the brain in the little head is too small to realize they also have a brain in the big head? LOL Some good links to shelters and things have been posted here, and I've sent the entire discussion to my friend. Hopefully they will help her....
1 person likes this
• United States
2 May 10
Sorry Sparks I dont live near there I dont think I know anyone that does either but I will ask around
2 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
2 May 10
Good to see you wont. And thanks a lot. Every little bit of info. helps.
2 people like this
@reinydawn (11649)
• United States
11 May 10
I am so on the wrong side of the country to help you, but I do hope your friend has gotten the help needed. When I first watched The Blind Side, I asked myself if I had ever made that committed statement and followed through with it - much as in the scene where Sandra Bullock is talking to Big Mike in the rain and asks if he has someplace to stay and she says "Don't you lie to me." At that defining moment, she had made the choice (before getting her answer) that he was going to be staying with them. You can't ask a question like that and do nothing about it. I made that commitment a couple years ago when I decided to do the Susan G. Komen 3-Day for the Cure. I'm not helping one individual, but I am helping my fellow man (well, mostly women).
@Ladyslipper (1330)
• Philippines
9 May 10
Hi, Good day! I do hope someone would be able to help her. I wish I could. Though I know support groups who might be able to help her it's not possible. I'm from a different country. All I could do is to pray that she would be able to get help soon.