Just as they put us in Day Care Centers, we put them in Homes.

@laydee (12814)
Philippines
May 4, 2010 5:03am CST
I came about thinking about it when we went to the Day Care Center at our local Mall to drop off my nephew so that we could watch a movie. I know that doing such an action is only right because it's difficult to bring kids to movie houses because they wouldn't really understand what the film was all about, it's better to be in the Playroom at least they get to play. A strange analogy formed in my mind: Just as we put our kids at Day Care Centers, they would soon put us in Homes when we're old. I think it's fitting to just absorb the idea for a few moments. We always see old people who are in homes and have lost connection or have a minimal connection with the relatives. These homes aren't cheap by the way, they are comfortable there, they are taken cared of. But, how do you think these old people feel of being deposited at a place instead of staying with the family? At one point in my life, I was fortunate enough to go for an exposure program in our school. We visited homes and orphanages. There I got the chance to interview an old man on a wheelchair. He says that he doesn't really feel old, but his body obviously doesn't have enough strength to do what he wants to do - dance. When we asked him of one wish he'd like to have, he says he wants to at least die at home. It was sad really. But that's the reality of life. So my question dear friends. Given that we're putting our kids in Day Care Centers, do you think we have the right to complain when they put us in homes? or when they choose where to put us when we grow old?
6 responses
@chiyosan (30204)
• Philippines
5 May 10
It is common, i guess in your country to put old people in nursing homes, the richer people getting nurses and so on... in the Philippines, though we have a home for the aged, we still do not bring our old parents in these places. most of the people in homes are those without family anymore. if you have a family it would be shameful for your kids to not take care of you as an old person - this is for Chineses too. We have such high regards for our parents that we do not plan to put them in homes when they are too old.
1 person likes this
@laydee (12814)
• Philippines
5 May 10
On contrare, I'm in the Philippines as well, and we take care of our grandparents. I'm just thinking about the kids of today when we put them in day cares. I was never put in a day care center because it didn't exist when we were younger. We had uncles and aunts to take care of us or a nanny. I'm just thinking what could the future have in store for us since we're not fond of putting our children (or nephews) in Day Care Centers.
@Thoroughrob (11750)
• United States
4 May 10
If there is anyway that I can do it, my parents will not be put in a home. I have taken care of my son, for the past 15 years, and would gladly take care of them, if the time comes. If there is no way that I can I will put them there, but those places are just plain scary.
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@laydee (12814)
• Philippines
5 May 10
Only if we're not so troubled financially these days then we could afford to stay home and be with the kids or have our parents with us with good assistance from a hired nurse or care-taker.
@dloveli (4369)
• United States
4 May 10
You are sooooo funny! However it is a good point. The trouble is that children today are lazy. When we grew up, family was number one. THese days its video games, cell phones, computers, etc. Life has become so easy. There are so many more cases of depression. I believe its due to the ability to encase yourself in a room without ever having to leave. You can do all you need by computer or phone. These factors make it easy for them to put us in a home. Day care isnt always the best answer either but its a big difference than the decision to put a parent in a home. If anyone tries to put you in ahome Email me I will take ya. As long as you dont mind the dogs, cat and bird. lol dl
1 person likes this
@laydee (12814)
• Philippines
5 May 10
Hahahaha! That's funny! I know, it seems kids today are really too lazy. They are selfish as well, they want what's easier. Can't really do things on their own. Which is really a symptom that sooner or later parents would be easily put to homes instead of really thinking about it. Yeah, I don't mind dogs and pets hehehe..
• Philippines
4 May 10
I think It's just fair. Well, if we can't take care of ourselves when we're old we'd be additional problem for our kids. It's kinda hard to accept but it seems fair to me.
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@laydee (12814)
• Philippines
5 May 10
I think it's really fair too, which is why it's quite an eye-opener for me to never give too much to my kids (or future kids) and always have some for my retirement. So that when I'm older, they won't need to worry about me, because I have the money to worry about me. Whew, if only I'm not struggling financially today.
@samson1967 (7422)
• India
4 May 10
Hi ladee, very good discussion for the ladies and gentlemen of mylot. Yes the parents leave the children at day care center and go to work to take a better care of their children and bring them back when they reach home. Whereas the children leave the parents at homes permanently. because they cannot take care of them at home. It is not fair on the part of the children.
1 person likes this
@laydee (12814)
• Philippines
5 May 10
Why is it not fair on the part of the children?
@JJ4Ever (4696)
• United States
6 May 10
Laydee, you bring up a really good point. I know we probably have joked with our parents at one time or another to treat us nice because we pick out their retirement home - LOL. I know I have, but when you really think about it, it's kind of sad! Here is my take on the whole thing. Putting kids in the day care makes sense. Sometimes the parents need to work to provide for the family. I still think parents need to set aside time each day to spend with their kids, but sometimes they need someone to watch them for a little while. As far as retirement homes go, it all depends on the situation whether or not parents/grandparents need to go there. Sometimes they need special attention and care that family members cannot provide on a daily basis. I know what you mean about them being expensive too. A good friend of mine had her mom in a pretty nice facility, and she had to pay $8,000 a month! (Her mom has since passed away, but talk about expensive!) I think the elderly people who are put in homes and still have family alive should have those family members visit them. It's a little different when the elderly have outlived their family members and are at the home by themselves. However, I think on one hand being in the home with others their age is a good thing because these people can connect with others and have relationships with lots of people their own age. Again, though, I think if family members are going to put their parents/grandparents into a home, that doesn't mean they should leave them alone! Even though they're not taking care of them, I think they still need to take time to see their family member in the home. My grandma takes care of my aunt because she developed multiple sclerosis a few years ago. There was a lot of debate amongst my family members whether or not my aunt should be put in a home. They eventually decided that my grandma would take care of her. In my opinion, either way, if my aunt was in a home or not, we as family need to make it a point to go see her. I don't see her that often because of my crazy schedule, but it's great that she is still around and has family to go see her. I think it's perfectly ok to put your older family in a home as long as you commit to visiting them - don't leave them alone or they will get lonely...but you never know, they'll probably make friends at the facility too. Great discussion, my friend!
1 person likes this