How did this momma's boy find me?
By paula27661
@paula27661 (15811)
Australia
May 5, 2010 9:19pm CST
I received a message the other day from Associated Content. It was to let me know that someone left a comment on one of my articles. A couple of years ago I wrote an article titled “Reasons to Keep Your Distance from a "Momma's Boy”. It was a piece telling the true story of how my heart was broken by a “momma’s boy”. Some of you may recall me telling this tale in one of my discussions. Anyway I called the heartbreaker in the story Tony which is not his real name, in fact I changed all the names to protect the innocent and all that (LOL). . .It is not a very flattering account as far as ‘Tony’ is concerned but all of it is true.
On the particular day in question here is the comment I found on my piece:
“Hello Paula Good to see you pursued your writing and seems you have done very well with it. I read some of your articles and was very impressed. My apologies for my actions...like you I was going through a difficult part of my life and yes it did take a while to see the error of my ways. I have grown older and wiser a lot like yourself it seems but I try not to make the same mistakes. As I can recall we were both products of our parents but as long as you let it life finds a way. Good luck Tony (if that's what you want to call me) P.S My wife wasn't abandoned and we are still together with 3 beautiful children.”
Well what do you make of that? He can place his apology where the sun don’t shine and I don’t care but what unnerves me is the fact that he shouldn’t have had any way to find me because my name has changed to my married name and there is no way he could have known that I was married let alone what my new name is!
I confess I’ve peaked at his Facebook Profile a couple of times and I wonder if that is how he found me because I have links to AC on my Facebook page. We have no friends in common and I have to wonder whether there is a way to track who has visited your Facebook profile. Does anyone know? Can one put a tracker on Facebook? What do you think about this incident? What are your views on protecting your identity on line?
4 people like this
9 responses
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
6 May 10
Hi, paula27661. This man sounds like a potential serial killer and a stalker too! Yes, I wonder how did he found you. It must have been through facebook. And how did he know that it was you that wrote this article. It could have been anyone that has the same name as you do. He has to remember that it is possible for someone with the same name to go through similar situations in life. You did not even use any real names at all. He is such a creep! And what is he trying to prove by saying that he has a wife and three beautiful children.?? Is this sucker trying to make you jealous. He needs to get his head together because, you and him was not married when you were together. Maybe being with you has taught him to be a better man. He should be thanking you for that!
2 people like this
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
7 May 10
He is a bit of a creep isn't he? His apology is not worth a great deal to me now, too little too late as they say...I am not overly concerned with him to be honest, if this had happened a few years ago it would have shaken me quite a lot because it took me a long time to get over him but I have my husband now and life is much better. It unnerved me that he managed to find me and leave such a message. I hope I find out how he spotted me one day...And you are right he should be thanking me! Thank you so much for your great response cream97, I really appreciate it!
@neildc (17239)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
7 May 10
i think i remember a few invites to have this application that you can see who views your profile page, but i can't remember the name of this application since i ignore those kinds of applications/invites. the best thing that i know is to set our privacy settings to only friends can view and ignore friend requests from people you do not know personally.
1 person likes this
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
13 May 10
I've heard of something too, yet others have told me it is impossible to track who has viewed your profile so I am unsure. I am not as concerned at this stage because I have not heard from him again and hopefully this will be the end of it. Thanks a lot for taking the time to respond neildc, appreciate it!
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
12 May 10
Hi Paula
I have heard if People are well educated on the Computer yes they can put trackers on their Profiles, I do know some People here in mylot have them on theirs
It could be that what traced him to you
I would not worry about it, yes it will be unnerve you but I would not worry as long as he does not start to bother you
Big Hugs
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
13 May 10
Hi gabs, thanks for stopping by. I guess I will more than likely never find out how he managed to track me down but I don't feel so bad now because I have not heard from him again so this may be the end of it I hope!
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
6 May 10
Nice to know that your writings connect you to new friends. I have not read your discussion about this interesting true story that you have posted here. I do have a facebook account but do not know how to check who has visited my profile there unless they put a comment somewhere in the profile. I treasure my privacy online but facebook is one social networking site where our identities are exposed cos that is how long lost friends or relatives connect to us.
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
6 May 10
This was no new friend more of a bad egg from the past who has left me puzzled as to how on earth he managed to track me down! From what I learned there is no way to find out who has seen your profile on FaceBook especially if they are not on your friends list, I could be wrong though...Thanks for visiting zandi!
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
7 May 10
Nowadays it seems if someone wants to try and find you, they will unfortunately.
Of course, a lot depends what kind of "tags" you may have put with your article and maybe "Tony" did some kind of search (momma's boy??) and came up with your article--then saw your description/bio info you have over at AC and connected the dots. As far as I know one can't really put a tracker on at FB...at least not an IP address tracker that would give location info of the person "visiting" your profile
Of course, a lot depends what kind of "tags" you may have put with your article and maybe "Tony" did some kind of search (momma's boy??) and came up with your article--then saw your description/bio info you have over at AC and connected the dots. As far as I know one can't really put a tracker on at FB...at least not an IP address tracker that would give location info of the person "visiting" your profile1 person likes this
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
7 May 10
Yes I am realising that it is not at all difficult to find someone.There are some who believe you can track who has seen your FB profile but as far as the site goes there is nothing there one can download that would let you know who has been viewing your page. It's not that big a deal, I'm just curious and I hope I find out how he did it one day. Thanks Pye...
@TheCatLady (4691)
• Israel
6 May 10
Maybe he just recognized that the article was about him. It's quite possible. I'm sure there are many immature mamas boys out there, but if you put in things specific to him, he might catch them and know who you are. I wouldn't worry about it much. It seems as if he is just apologizing in his own misguided half assed way and will move on.
1 person likes this
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
6 May 10
It would be quite a coincidence but sure, it would be possible...Yes his apology was half assed wasn't it? I'm sure I will not hear from him again...Thanks for being here CatLady, appreciate it!
@TheCatLady (4691)
• Israel
6 May 10
I'd just ignore it and go on with your life. He's not worth the energy spent worrying or thinking about him.
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
6 May 10
No and I doubt he'll be in touch again. It's not really him I'm worried about, it's just that fact that people can locate you so easily! Oh well at least I got a half hearted apology...Thanks for stopping by Elic...
1 person likes this
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
7 May 10
Yes...I wonder...I will be more careful where I lurk from now on. I might try to find out about this app and use on my own page, it would be very interesting...I guess he's not likely to stalk me or anything like that, I am just curious how he located me, that's all. Thanks Dawn!
@savypat (20216)
• United States
6 May 10
Well good luck with keeping your identity private, I think they can even find out which color underwear you have on. I was warned of a site where you were totally exposed, anything that was public record was available, not always correct but in some ways that is even worse. For a small fee all information was there. We looked at ours and immediately delete all. But just the fact that someone can spend the time gathering all this info is scary. I must admit I was tempted to look up some people from my past, but didn't give in. I do believe in leaving the past alone. I am sure anything published in a public way is available along with your marriage license, property ownership, car regestration etc.
1 person likes this
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
7 May 10
I didn't know of such a site...I guess if a person wants to find you they will. I was so surprised that this person could find me and yet not even be aware that I married and there is no way he would have known my new name. As you say once you're online your identity is no longer private. Thanks pat!
