Are you willing to forgive even when the hurt is still there?
May 8, 2010 6:46am CST
This was the question raised by a good friend of mine when I told her that I want to be set free of all the hurts I have. I got inspired with it because it served as a challenge to me. It's true that people might never changed anymore. They will be who they are as ease. But I must learn to forgive even if the hurt is still there and even if those who hurt you will continue to do so. That is how I could show my love for others as well as for myself. Because grudges are toxic.
2 people like this
8 May 10
It has never been easy and never will. Learning to forgive may just take a lifetime to learn. Because it has taken me many years to do so. When it still hurts it is still hard to forgive. Is there anything to lose to forgive? I don't think there is any, at least for me. And I don't mean to offend anyone with this. I agree that grudges are toxic as you put it. By forgiving I hope I will forget. It makes moving on easy.
8 May 10
I do not have such a big heart girl---anyone who hurt me would be outta my life it depends on their deeds though if it is a simple one then i wouldnt mind forgiving else i would be the hard nut in this world.I tend to avoid them and do not wish to see their face again.great day.
8 May 10
Its really difficult to forgive someone while the pain is still there. It is very challenging. But I know, for me, as a Christian, forgiving even if the pain is still there pleases God, so I choose to forgive. It's not easy, but with GOd I can, and I have. I already experienced forgiving a person who hurt me the most, who caused me so much depression even if he didn't ask forgiveness. But i know I could never do that without God. It was only the grace of GOd that allowed me to do such thing.
17 May 10
yeah for me forgiving is to forget... sometimes you have to forgive for you to move on from something that really bothers you or something that really hurts your feelings... but you can't just forgive someone just because you love that person or just for the sake of forgiving!... sometimes you have kick some butt!..punch some face! poke some eye! bite the ears! smash something to the head! sometimes you have to be brave! ..after that..... you have to ask for forgiveness.. haha.. so now they'll know how hard to forgive. :D
9 May 10
Remember we are not perfect so like everyone else we make mistakes, more often doing it more than once. So let us all ask ourselves... who are we in the first place...are we perfect? So we are not able to forgive... so since we are all human and do make mistakes, we should be able to forgive. Just remember when you are ready to forgive, stop bringing it up again and again because the hurt inside you will never stop. I believe that if we really get hurt and betrayed by someone we love, we tend to numb ourselves and keep our feelings inside a box and its like putting an old box with memories on top of the shelf. So from time to time when we are vulnerable, then we tend to recall our hurt. Seems its just there inside us, lurking waiting for our memories to resurface. As you said grudges are toxic so best that we don't bear grudges, it may eventually poison our relationships with the ones we love.
9 May 10
Releasing of forgiveness doesn't only frees the person who hurt us but it also frees us from all the hurt and the negative energies that we go through while we keep on harboring grudges unto someone. God himself command us to forgive, for it is in forgiving that we are forgiven. That is even if the person will ask for it or not but what is important is that we forgive. It is a great leap in your part to forgive not everyone at time age and time would do so!!!
9 May 10
Forgiving someone who causes you too much pain is hard. Lets admit that its not that easy. Saying that its alright is also hard. But i think we need to remember that the only way to let go of the pain and the hurt is to forgive, forget and moved on. You can never let go of the pain if you haven't forgive the person who causes it. We always ask and pray to forgive us our sins but we never forgive others. So, i think the best way to let go and free yourself from that hurt is to forgive.
8 May 10
Yes, I will. No matter how hurtful it has been, it's really no use bearing grudges for something that cannot be undone. Moreover, it's really a heavy burden. We should just learn to put it down so that we can go further. Lastly, inability to forgive will more or less has some adverse psychological effects on us.
8 May 10
well no way.i mean i have got experience.i know one should forgive others but when you are still hurt then your mind would never be ready to forgive the other person.because at that time most of us think of taking revenge and we are not in a mindset to forgive.its human nature.
10 May 10
Forgive and never forget. I think that most of us have been in this kinds of situation. Just don't bother to think of the negative things that are happening. Instead be open for all possibility. The possibilities of learning and making it the way it used to be.