step daugther

United States
May 24, 2010 12:46pm CST
what would you do if you had a step daugther that had been in you life for 15 years or age 8 to 23 she has a baby and come's to live with you and you help her raise the baby until she is 5 her dad dies and she start's treating me like crap so she moves away and has been gone for a year now she wants to come back what would you do ? would you tell her yes or no?
2 people like this
9 responses
• United States
24 May 10
Oh man, that's a tough one. I might if she would sit with me and we could discuss some parameters. I might consider it for the child's sake but only if she agrees to certain things like not treating you improperly!
• United States
25 May 10
it really is the child i raised her for 5 years and she took her away last year to hurt me alittle more and she has bounded from house to house and now her welcome is wore out every where and it is getting to where there is no where for them to go. and my hosue is home to the baby and i am really lonely and it is very hard for me to make up my mind on what to do i dont what to be ripped apart again
@ANTIQUELADY (36488)
• United States
25 May 10
She needs to take responsibility for herself & her child. I know it would be hard telling her no but think u would be doing her a favor in the long run.
@ANTIQUELADY (36488)
• United States
26 May 10
i hope it all works out for the best.
• United States
25 May 10
It depends on many factors if you would want to give her a second chance. I don't know about her moving back with you unless certain things are met like being repsectful, holding down a job, paying tward the bills in the household..... & no using you or anyone as daycare. I don't know the situation but those are some general things I guess I'd require of my kids if they moved out or decided to stay/come back after they were an adult. I think some good heart to heart dicussions would be in order with her and you and your hubby privatly on the matter.
• United States
25 May 10
well thanks for the respone it helps alot but my hubby past away so it is all left up to me
• United States
24 May 10
If you had problems with her and she left to begin with. I would say no to her and tell her exactly why. If the child has no where to go offer to take the child till she gets on her feet. I would not let a problem back into my home once it is gone.
• Philippines
24 May 10
It depends but it surely sounds to me that she's gonna take advantage of you as soon as she moves in. I don't really know her that much for you to believe me so i suggest you think about it first. Make a decision based on her attitude and behaviour. Weigh all her tendencies.
• United States
25 May 10
her attitude will be great for about the first month or the first time she dont get to do something she want's and she will promise the world but how soon they forget kinda like making a loan to someone and you have to ask for a payment and you get o you made me a loan i don't recall that have you ever been there
@zralte (4186)
• India
24 May 10
Ooh...that's quite a predicament you are in. I probably would tell her no and give some convincing excuse in a nice way. I would not be nasty to her, still be very nice to her, but I would be nice to her from a distance, if you know what I mean. Letting her come back will only mess you up. You've got to move on and live your life. If you do decide to let her come back, I'd advise you to make clear boundaries of what she could and could not do in your house. Good Luck. Don't let her mistreat you or take advantage of you.
• United States
25 May 10
i have been nice to her i have not forgotten one hoilday or birthday it is just really hard because i have been the only mother she has ever had her really mom walk out when she was 8 months old and my sister-in-law had her until she was 8 and then i have been in the picture every sence so it makes it hard
• India
13 Nov 11
I don't have any step daughter, but because of this 'if', i can say i will definitely help her in all possible ways atleast on humanitarian ground. Thanks for sharing Have a nice day ahead. Professor ‘@Bhuwan@’. .
@JenInTN (27564)
• United States
30 Apr 11
This is a tough one. I guess that after all this time you have made a choice and followed through. I hope whatever you chose worked out well for you. I think I would have fought with myself tremendously...depending on how she left of course...and then I might have even tried it...for the little ones sake...but I don't know...it is a tough one and I don't know how bad things were between you when she left. That can be the thing that made me choose what to do. Update us on what happened. I bet everyone is curious as to how it worked out. Take care.
• Philippines
24 May 10
It depends but it surely sounds to me that she's gonna take advantage of you as soon as she moves in. I don't really know her that much for you to believe me so i suggest you think about it first. Make a decision based on her attitude and behaviour. Weigh all her tendencies.