coping with life after a break-up

@pree70 (525)
India
May 26, 2010 1:51am CST
how do i cope up with a break up? the pain i am undergoing is terrible and i feel that my whole life has come to an end. my future looks bleak and dreary and i feel so very lonely right now. what do i do????
1 person likes this
11 responses
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
26 May 10
Breaking up is one of the last word that we wanted from any relationship. But,you have to move on,and understand that,life never ends from any relationship. Sometimes we learn more from failures,and pain made us stronger too. In any relationship,we must consider that,forever is not always applicable. That,the word forever alone is forever,and nothing in this world is forever,but everything will someday come to an end. Keep moving on,i know it's not easy to mend a broken heart.
2 people like this
@pree70 (525)
• India
26 May 10
i am too terrified to even think of how i will cope up with this pain in the coming days. each minute seems to drag on to no end.
@zralte (4178)
• India
26 May 10
Chin up, it is not the end of the world, though it may feel like one. You have to do everything that will keep you from thinking about your ex. In my opinion, it is best to avoid being alone. When you are alone with your thoughts, it is so easy to think of the worse. You probably feel like you have nothing to look forward to now. Well, you are wrong. There are a lot more things that you can do, and soon, you will be back to your normal self. Think positively, try to stay happy, and if you need to, cry out loud. Call your friends and enjoy yourself.
1 person likes this
@pree70 (525)
• India
26 May 10
what do i do with the whole load of memories i had? what do i do with the gifts that i had received? will i ever get over this hearbreak???
@zralte (4178)
• India
26 May 10
Yes you will get over the heartbreak. Keep the memories locked away somewhere for now. You will cherish it later on, but right now, they probably bring you more tears. So try to forget them. Keep them in a secret place where you can visit them later and may be have fun with them. Same thing with the gifts. Though you may want to return some of them. Those that you want to keep, locked them away somewhere. They will just bring you tears at the moment. You can take them out later when the wounds get healed and that time you can enjoy them. Be strong. Happy thoughts.
1 person likes this
@pree70 (525)
• India
26 May 10
thanks a lot. i surely will try to get over it.
@_Honey_ (780)
• Philippines
26 May 10
Hello Pree. I feel bad for the sadness you are feeling right now. I just want to let you know that I sincerely feel for you and I really understand.I've been there and true enough that it's really tough to get by but my advice to you is to take it slow. Funny but true, you can just indulge on your sadness. Grieve so long as you still feel the pain. It's like a wound. It hurts and it takes such a long time to heal. But you'll get by and you'll heal again. After that, focus on your job, go out with friends, find yourself. Enjoy how things are being single and DON'T DATE ANOTHER GUY NOR FIND SOMEONE ELSE again. Take some time to heal completely and don't go for a rebound relationship.
1 person likes this
@annierose (18926)
• Philippines
26 May 10
I understand what you are feeling because I also felt same way after I broke up with my first boyfriend. There are no nights that I would not cry especially if I saw all those things he gave to me when we are still on our relationship. However, life has to go on. It may seems funny thinking that there is a huge number of people here on earth, and this one person seems to be the only one who is living in this planet that we cannot let go.Well, life is like that. Sometimes, we have to let go of some people that we loved because we are not really meant to be. Instead of brooding over on your situation, just think of the happiness he had contributed on our life. I believe that people just came in our life for a reason. What we must to is to accept things. It is the only key for you to somehow move on with what are you feeling now. Praying your condition with God is the best way to get out of your depression. God will make your burden lighter if you pray solemnly with Him. Making yourself busy will do a great help also. If you are busy, you can somehow forget him. Socializing with friends and doing your hobbies is also a good idea. Just think of those things that you were doing before you met him. Listen, you had spent your life meaningfully and wonderfully before he came, you can also spend it same way even he left.
1 person likes this
@pree70 (525)
• India
26 May 10
i'm trying, my friend. i'm trying desperately. but suddenly, i seem to have forgotten what life was without him. i really hope that time will heal my wounds. i am in constant touch with God and it is only these prayers that are giving me the strength to survive. it is only day 2. so i guess, things will get better and i will start to forget him as the days pass
@karen1969 (1779)
26 May 10
Well, at the moment you are right in the middle of the pain and hurt, so you will feel awful. You may not be able to think of the future, but believe me, the pain will lessen and there will be a time you will feel much better. Breaking up is like a bereavement, a loss, so you have to go through the process of grieving. The best things to do in this time are to rest and sleep, to cry if it helps you and to talk to your friends who will understand and advise you. It is extremely painful, but you WILL get better!
@pree70 (525)
• India
26 May 10
thanks a lot, karen. i hope i survive this.
@karen1969 (1779)
26 May 10
You will do!! Stay strong!
@Joyce_04 (84)
• Philippines
26 May 10
It's always like that after break up. It's painful and you felt very lonely especially if you used to do things with your partner and now, you are all alone. It's normal after break up, this is where you have to stand up and pick upthings you left from the time you started to be with your ex. Call your friends and spend time with them, take time with yourself. Read the books you haven't read because you were together and you don't have time for it. Treat yourself to a spa or go to the gym. You can jog as well or walk. It would give you time to exercise as well a good think of things. Spend time with your family. Or spend more time on your hobbies. Don't libger to the thoughts that you are alone, that is not true. If it really hurts and you feel anxious, eat ice cream or chocolate. That will help you ease up.
@pree70 (525)
• India
26 May 10
the worst part is that i cannot think of anything i want to do. i don't feel like talking to anyone and neither am i hungry. oh God! this is really painful
@pree70 (525)
• India
26 May 10
thanks, joyce.. i will try.
• Philippines
26 May 10
Depression can kill us pree. If we don't help ourselves we cannot move on. Get up and walk. Give yourself sometime to think. If it is really painful, it is okay to cry but not too long. If you don't feel like talking to anyone, then don't talk. Just spend sometime with a group of friends if you can. Let them do the talking instead. Eating those stuff are not only for hungry people, it can help you ease the pain inside because those food were adrenaline boosters. It will help you lower down your depression. If your too depress to move, go to sleep.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 May 10
you got to think ahead in a positive matter my friend just because someone shuts the door on you there is always another one open you understand what i am trying to say don't let one thing drag you down because that will ruin your whole life move forward get over it and you shall become a well respected person in life
1 person likes this
@pree70 (525)
• India
26 May 10
i do wish i could. but just now the wound is too raw and painful that i all i do is sit and cry.
@Cutie18f (9551)
• Philippines
27 May 10
Time heals all wounds, so they say. I believe in this saying. I've been into that situation a number of times and I thought each time I'd never survive the pain and the loneliness but I was wrong. After a time, I forget everything and I am renewed. Just keep yourself busy wherever you are---at home or at work. Do not allow loneliness or the feeling of emptiness conquer you. You only have to be in control of your emotion and the situation.
@xeroeight (1060)
• Philippines
27 May 10
try to do something that may get your attention and forget about being in that situation, or accept it and move on, be with your friends try to have fun.
• Australia
26 May 10
Your future may look bleak but it need not be that way. You have many, many good fun years of life to live and those fun times are just waiting round the corner. Just remember that almost everyone has been through what you are experiencing and has survived and are now happy in a new life. I know, it is just this time of pain that you have to get through. The only way I get through these times is to get out and socialize with people and keep your mind busy. While it may not be a good idea to jump into another relationship till this one has healed, just remember that your new partner could be just around the corner too. Look forward to good times again and keep looking ahead in anticipation. We all feel for you. Hang in there.
@pree70 (525)
• India
26 May 10
thanks pal. i do realise that my grief is perfectly normal... it is just that i have a lot of questions in my mind which are unanswered, the foremost of which is 'Why ME?'
• Indonesia
27 May 10
I think that life is long and beautiful,the couple who went from us might not be our soul mate,but our soul mate is out there waiting for us,then why do we have to think of a couple who have left us, life is too beautiful to be wasted