A friend who often lies to me

Philippines
May 29, 2010 7:14pm CST
I have a very close friend and we always love being together enjoying things like a normal friends does. However, I am already aware about his bad attitude about lying and his lies are even easy to read thus I can always avoid his bad intention. Do you also have a friend who loves to tell lies? and how do your deal with him or her?
1 person likes this
22 responses
@krischine (270)
• Philippines
31 May 10
Most of the friend usually lies, why? because they envy you.. They don't want you to know in what they do so that you won't get any idea specially towards courting a woman. He will hide the real fact, until such time you will find what is it and confront him. Some friends also use your name as an alibi, when he ask for a permission to go out with somebody. But you must not tell your friend every secrets you have, try to keep it to your self specially those personal secrets.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
Yes you are right mate and I do appreciate your response. There was this one time where I manage to court a girl and we seem to like one another but suddenly here comes my lying friend telling stories about me to the girl whenever I turn my back away from them. So they ended up being together instead but not until I found another better girl. However, I just found out that my friend and the previous girl had broken up and then he began taking this new girl again away from me. I already had enough so I guess that I have to look for a girl in a secretive manner.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
That's what I've done with my friend, most of my bf she always flirt with them and she makes all the move to get my man. In the later part, I came to my senses that she is my friend but I could not trust her regarding with my Love life, so I kept it hidden from her. It's up to her if she founds out.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
I wanted to ask about what are you going to do when your friend found out about it? it's because my friend seems to have the stalking capability towards me where he usually pops out of nowhere where I think he may find out any secret such as courting a girl at a later time.
• Philippines
30 May 10
I've had several friends like that. When you know a person is lying it's almost impossible that you'll be tricked by that person. I just ignore what he tells me that I'm sure is a lie. But in your case, you said your friend has bad intentions, you may have to be extra careful with that one. It might get out if hand one day. He isn't your friend if he has bad intentions for you.
• Philippines
8 Jun 10
Yeah he has bad intentions to me where he seems to take everything from me which is either a girl friend to a certain pet that I love. I really hate him so much and I wanted to end our friendship but he probably knew my weakness where I am a very forgiving person.
• Philippines
8 Jun 10
Then try not to forgive him. It's really that easy if you think about it.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
Like I said he is a good lier and perhaps a talented actor as well because it often affects my feeling to forgive him where he seems to act sincere enough with his apologies. He often says that I am only his friend and there's no one else that he could turn in times of troubles while crying and so on...
@balaman (147)
• India
1 Jun 10
yaar i have 2 guys good friends to me, they gossip (tell lies) i only listen to them talk and keep nodding, but i will not reply or utter any word, i dont take it serious but i will be very careful with myself
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
I think that telling a lie through gossip is a way lot much better because you won't be able to hear the exact detail of the lie. My friend's behavior about lying is to tell it directly infront of my face or among others with his wide eyes open and a serious look of his staring face.
@balaman (147)
• India
9 Jun 10
I thought my friend was a master held degree in telling lies but i find you have a professional. hahaha just kidding dont take it serious..
• Philippines
10 Jun 10
Yeah my friend is a professional actor but not a celebrity of any kind of show. Just an ordinary individual with a natural born talent of acting. I just hate the part that he uses his acting talent to gain advantage with his lying skills.
@betlynfrnds (1138)
• United States
30 May 10
If I discovered that a trusted friend of mine began to lie, they would no longer be a friend but just an acquaintance. I don't tolerate lying of any sort.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
Wow you seem to be so strict. What happens when he or she is just lying to cover some personal matters about him or her? Anyway, It's nice to know that you have a strict policy about having a trusted friend and I am sure that most of your friend are reliable.
• United States
9 Jun 10
Yes, I know that I'm a bit strict, but when you reach a certain stage in life, it's time to cut the bull. If they're covering over a personal matter, I would still be concerned about their integrity. I may not cut them off entirely, but I may want to have a serious talk with them. Every situation is different. I have a very dear friend who is quite reliable and that's really all I need.
• Philippines
10 Jun 10
Wow you are lucky enough to have a friend as compared to mine. Anyway, I wish that I could be strict as you are.
@eurekafemme (5881)
• Philippines
30 May 10
First,he is not a friend. A friend is someone you can rely on and not someone who'd lie to you. Eventhough you are enjoying doing things together but only for the sake of having fun.Aren't you afraid that if time will come that your friendship with him will be tested he's turn his back on you and give you lies instead of helping you out with the truth. I don't get it when 'friends' lie... I don't want to be associated with someone who can't tell the truth...
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
There was one time when we are inside the class room and we are seated together at the middle of the class. Suddenly he farted with something that smells too bad and blamed the act to me. I didn't believe that the whole class would believe him that I was the one responsible so even our teacher has to lecture me with some good manners.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
that was really bad of him! you shouldn't get hooked with someone who'd give you trouble instead of helping you out .... A friend doesn't wish his/her friend ill nor do bad to her/him... Just like I already told you he is not a true friend...
• Philippines
10 Jun 10
Regardless of whether he is not a true friend, he is always hanging around me where ever I go. I just can't find a good way on how to get rid of him.
• United States
30 May 10
Does he bold face lie or is it more like an exaggeration of the truth? Yes I know they are both lies but there is a difference when it comes to "no I didn't steal your money" or "ya, the car has an awesome paint job and I paid 15,000 for it (when in reality it cost like 1000 and it is all scratched up)" I would just see if it was meant to be untruthful or if he is trying to impress.
30 May 10
Either way they can both be dangerous. I had a friend who would make up stories, which we all thought were harmless, until she said that someone had raped her. We all obviously believed her, and encouraged her to go to the police. It went as far as going to court before she changed her story and said that she wasn't sure if it had actually happened after all, and this was only after the male involved managed to produce evidence that he was in work when this happened. The same girl also accused another friend's boyfriend of trying to kiss her, which caused the couple to split up. Always remember that you can never trust a liar. You can trust a thief more than you can trust a liar because at least you know what a thief is capable of/
• United States
30 May 10
See now I would classify that as a bold face lier, especially if they made up stories. I think exaggerating is like when something is real they just make it more glamorous.
• Philippines
8 Jun 10
Well my friend does not only tell lies in a manner where you can categorize him because he does all sorts of lying. I really hate him so much but I just can't find a good reason to live him behind because as I stated he is a good lier where he can make his own excuses and apologies just to let me stick on him for most of the time.
@mokkka (883)
• Bulgaria
11 Jun 10
There are many people whose natures are that kind they feel more proud of themselves let's say when they overexagerate something about their life for example.On the other hand I wouldn't feel comfortable if I knew someone lies to me.What does it mean a real friend if most of the things he says are not real.
• Philippines
12 Jun 10
Yeah that's the part where most of my friend does commit a lie to me. He over exaggerate things and the worst part is adding some unbelievable events that never happens. He often adds details where he think of himself as a super man which makes his story just a complete lies.
@setsuna26 (2410)
• Philippines
8 Jun 10
All i can say is been there, done that lol i mean i have some friends really close friends who always lie to me as well. But instead of looking at it negatively i just made sure that i always be honest with them and make sure that i treat them well. I tried doing reverse psychology to them, like do the things that they dont do to you. And im hoping that somehow they will be able to appreciate the goodness that im giving them and in return slowly they will mend their ways and me a lil bit more honest with me and stop lying just because they want to.Even though they lie to me alot i still like them as my friends because i believe still that every human is capable of changing themselves if they really want to. Have a great day and hope to see you comment on my topics as well my friend
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
Sorry about not commenting on most of the previous responses but not until now. Anyway, you mentioned about the reverse psychology and infact I already applied the system on my friend where I really treated him with such great honesty. However, I didn't expect that the result is just a further abuse on my kindness and effort. I really do not know what to do and I wish that I shouldn't known him in the first place.
@dheckerz (473)
• Philippines
31 May 10
Yes. I have good friends who lies to me. What i do is just listen to what they're saying but i don't agree at all in what they have to say. In that case, it sends them a signal that i know that they're lying.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
That's a very nice thing to do where you simply had to keep silent and they already know that you are aware that they are just lying. This single individual which I still consider as a friend always tells a lie whether I'm mad or angry or even silent which signifies that I'm already feed up with his lies.
@qamarep (4453)
• Pakistan
30 May 10
all of my friends are liers all the times they are bad people i dont like them wea re friends because we have to meet most of the times and its customery that they are my friends
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
You have mentioned on your response that most of your friends are liers and that's way too sad to know about. I'm glad that I have a few more friends besides the lier that I am talking on this discussion. Perhaps you can look more other friends and I'm sure that you can always find a better one.
@warvial (1154)
• Singapore
30 May 10
Hi, I am not sure if my friend lies to me often but if she does, I believe she has a reason. And if I knows she is lying, I won't want to reveal to her unless she told me willingly. Because there are times when I will lie to her as well because I want to avoid certain things which I see it too personal to let her know. Unless your friend lies about terrible things, which affects you in making major decision or judgement about certain people or things, else it's nature for us to let it slip without making things weird for each other.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
I admit for myself that I also commit lying but not to the extent of doing it most of the time or with the intention to hurt somebody else. Just like what you have said, I also tell a lie to cover something personal on my life. However, my friend that I was talking about tells a lie most of the time regardless of whether we are and whatever we are currently doing.
• United States
30 May 10
I cannot stand people who lie. especially people who lie about stupid things. I will end a friendship quicker over dishonesty than anything else. The bible says the Lord hates liers and although I have not gotten to a point to hate anybody. I hate lying and will take myself far away from it as quick as possible!
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
You are right that it was stated on the Bible that the Lord hates liers and a good example of such person on the Bible itself is Judas. However, the Lord is a forgiving God and so as he teaches us to forgive one another. This is the reason that even Judas betrayed Jesus, he didn't hate him until the end.
@jeanieous (107)
• Philippines
30 May 10
I understand you because I also have a friend who is always lying even for simple things we're talking about. Honestly, I can't get her because when she lies, she's just making things so complicated and giving me reasons to think that all that she was saying were merely lies. I think, she is an concoction expert. Meaning, she does great in making stories and making us believe with her lies. However, me and our friends really told her about it. She changed though but of course, only a bit. She is one of my closest and my best friends so I just have to accept and understand her for who she is and don't forget to let her know when she is exaggerating already.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
It's really nice to know that you can control her by telling her that she is already going overboard. Well as compared to my friend, he doesn't seem to listen every time that I tell him to quit telling lies. All he does is to give me an answer with a nod of his face and perhaps that means yes.
@kharlav (1673)
• Philippines
30 May 10
Yes, I have a friend, well actually she is my bestfriend. She used to lie to me all the time, I mean all the time.. It would be rare if she tells me the truth. What I did was not believe her. I just got to her lying that I already learned the pattern of her lying that I know when to and not to believe her. If she lies to you all the time, just listen but never bother believing just to be safe.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
I guess I have found the same person who has the same situation as I do. I am glad that you already know the feeling and experience of having such a kind of friend. Anyway, I also learned his pattern of lying style but there are still some that always gets away and it hurts me.
@paula27661 (15900)
• Australia
30 May 10
I used to have a work colleague who was also a friend and she had the terrible habit of lying almost all the time! Some of the lies she told didn’t even make sense as they were situations where there was no need for her not to tell the truth. For some people lying becomes such a habit that they begin to believe their own fibs and for some they lie because they have bad intentions. Either way it is impossible to trust a liar and without trust no relationship is worthwhile in my opinion. Have you spoken to him about this? The sad thing is that he will probably lie anyway...I would reconsider the friendship...
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
Yeah we already talked about this several times where I told him not to lie anymore because it's way too irritating especially when you are aware that it is just a lie. We often argued most of the time but like I said previously, he has a good acting skill where he can cry with some tears falling out of his cheeks. So I can't really do anything but to forgive him at the end.
1 person likes this
30 May 10
i had a friend once and was my best friend to who told me so many lies. i found out about them later when we were best friends for years. she just used me cuz i was the next best thing i guess. i did was i told her straight up that i knew she lied to me. i mean u may argue and be mad at each other for awhile but if u rly are good friends then u to will get over it.
• Philippines
9 Jun 10
I guess that we do both have the same experience with such a kind of friend. Well we often argue due to his lies that are exposed or known by me but in the end I always do forgive him because It's just my good quality as a person. It's my weakness that I think he often abused.
@rhinarea (311)
30 May 10
I don't really know if i have friends who lies maybe white lies but not bad lies really, i don't like people who has that bad attitude, if i have known a friend of mine who lies directly on my face an i know for sure that he/she are lying i will confront him/her and ask why do you have to lie to me just like that, it's very annoying just to think people who has that attitude maybe they are very insecure.
• Philippines
8 Jun 10
I already asked that question to my friend several times which is "Why do you always lie to me?" but he insist on trying to make his way out through various alibi. He's really good when it comes to talking so I just can't really figure out how to end his bad lying attitude.
@cloud31 (5811)
30 May 10
I have the same friend who always wants to tell a lie and inventing story as well, especially when she need something from me,she keeps telling stories to make feel she is sincere and whatsoever. But I loss my interest to her,it makes me sick every time I found out that she lied to me,even in a very simple thing and situation so I keep distance to her and let her analyze whats her intention of telling a lies.I didn't not say I'm a perfect one whose not telling a lie but for always it doesn't make sense anymore and it will lost the trust of others if get used to it. Good day!
• Philippines
8 Jun 10
You have just mentioned the word Trust which I think is what keeps a friendship from being together or bonded. I also often do the same thing to my friend where I really have to analyze every bit of what he is trying to say before giving my response. It's because I do not trust most about what he says but I think that I trust him as a friend.
• Philippines
30 May 10
as long as her lies does not harm me or someone, it's ok with me...
• Philippines
8 Jun 10
I couldn't think of any situation where a certain lie could not harm you or somebody else. Perhaps a lying joke but I'm sure that there are still some individuals who might not be able to take the joke and got hurt. Anyway, my friend that I was talking about has some bad intentions which means it could either hurt me or someone.
• India
30 May 10
I a close friend lies to me often without reason, he will not be close friend anymore. How can you say he is your close friend and often lies to you? I would like not to have friendship with a person who lies evry now and then for no reason. he may have his reason to lie but why so, if he is your close friends should tell the truth. May be he is afraid that you will not take his side on those matters and he lies.
• Philippines
8 Jun 10
Yes I did mention that he is a close friend to me but the part that I do not like about him is that he often lies to me. I agree with you that he shouldn't be considered as a friend since he has bad intentions as well. There was one time where I got mad at him telling that our friendship is over and I want him to leave me alone but he still insist on coming close to me trying to apologize. It's really my own weakness to pity such begging individuals in front of me so he manages to be my friend until this current time.