When you don't like a child...

@hvedra (1623)
June 1, 2010 6:57am CST
I don't mean not liking kids in general but when there is one in particular that you don't like because they aren't nice to be around. You can't say "don't bring THAT kid, but the other one is okay" to their parents. Well, I suppose you could but imagine how it would go down... Some friends of ours have three daughters and one is lovely, another is mostly okay but the other one I wish they'd find a sitter for. I think it really is a personality thing rather than a phase or anything like that. What do you do in situations like that?
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9 responses
@writersedge (22579)
• United States
1 Jun 10
I had a kid brother that was mentally disabled. People had no problem saying they didn't want him around which hurt may parents terribly. So we didn't go much of anywhere.
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@hvedra (1623)
23 Jun 10
Wow, that's really harsh! I know I'm more tolerant if I know a kid has a disability or genuine problem. Some friends of ours have a severely autistic son and being around him can be something of a rollercoaster ride but it is different when you know the kid has genuine difficulty with his behaviour.
• United States
1 Jun 10
Oh I so understand. Unfortunately for us the kids we cannot stand are family so we have to deal with them. Unfortunately we have cut back on seeing our family greatly because of it. My one brother in law has kids that are hyper but we do not mind because they are good kids at heart and are not down right mean. My other brother in law's kids are not only wild but mean in nature. They are spoiled and undisciplined. We have to worry our kids will be hurt by them any time we see them and one of our biggest issues is the fact that our kids not only show disappointment when we say they will be at this family function or that but the little one will not go to play at all and cries when she sees them because they are so horrible. To make it worst the one closest to her age likes to hit, kick, tackle and bite. Last time we saw them he bit her to the point of bleeding, so (not being a push over by any means) she hit him back very hard and knocked him over. My sister in law yelled at my kid for defending herself. Her son needed a kiss my daughter needed two stitches in her arm. The worst part is that this has broken apart quite a close relationship between mt husband and his brother. Most of this is the parent fault as they do not believe in telling their kids "no" as they believe it will hurt their self esteem. (No issues telling our kids and nieces and nephews no though). They are creating monsters and I am curious to see when he goes to public kindergarten how long it will be before they change their tune or he is expelled. As for what we do, as I said we stay away as long as we can and I have no issue telling the kids to stop doing whatever. I will not let my kids be hurt by theirs if I can help it. Also my husbands Grandparents have asked them not to bring the kids to their house until they can behave as well as my father in law has asked them to leave both his job and a few other situations. We have all made it clear we will not go in public with them.
@hvedra (1623)
23 Jun 10
You do wonder how and why some people are oblivious to their kid's bad behaviour and how some even enable it. I feel sorry for kids in those situations because parents have to care enough to say "no" to them and raise them to be able to deal with a variety of situations.
@ohiocy (215)
• Malaysia
2 Jun 10
Well I believe there's nothing much that we can do but just play along. After all we don't wish to hurt our friend or even the heart of the little ones. But no matter how, they will change someday, nobody stays the same throughout the course of time. Hopefully we will be able to see more of them after they have change into the people they we prefer to have as a company and not before that. Lol.. Cheers.
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@kosanya (28)
• United States
1 Jun 10
I am not sure if it is nature or nurture that is involved here. However, I do know that when parents fail to teach their children proper manners, the children will more than likely grow up to be mean spirited people. I do agree that when someone is in your house, they should follow your rules. Ofcourse you should also be forgiving of some things. However, do not let anyone take advantage of you.
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@janron29 (266)
• Philippines
1 Jun 10
Different people have different personalities or attitudes. The person's behavior is greatly affected on the surroundings he grew up and the people he encountered everyday. It is not the child's fault, if they behave unlikely. It is the parents the responsibility to teach the child what is right and wrong.
@celticeagle (114031)
• Boise, Idaho
1 Jun 10
I came home from work one day to find the daughter of my daughter's friend there. I asked her to clean up after herself for me. I got snaughty with me and said I wasn't her mother and she didn't have to listen to me. So I told her that if she was not going to go by my rules in my house she was to go outside and then I called her mother to come and pick her up. I think when children (or anyone) are in your house they need to go by your house rules. And if they continually don't then I would tell their parents they can't come over anymore!
@laglen (19783)
• United States
1 Jun 10
dont invite then at all.
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@oldchem1 (8144)
1 Jun 10
There is one boy who occassionaly calls for my son and I just cannot take to this lad at all. He is very badly behaved and I don't like my sonbeing with him I try not to show my dislike but I think I make it pretty obvious that I don't like him
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@kharlav (1673)
• Philippines
1 Jun 10
lol. I find your discussion funny but true, I sometimes could relate to you. I have these two nephews, the other one is cute,kind and sweet while the other one is not, they are so opposite. I dont want to be with the mean kid. No one would want to be with a mean kid. But i cant do anything about it,so what I do is just suck it in.
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