When you love some one and you both are not together, how do you manage?

Pakistan
June 4, 2010 1:03pm CST
Yes, that will look very strange to the people living in West part of the world but it is very common here in East. and Specially in Pakistan and India. when you love a lady and you are unable to see her face for months. Also you can only talk on mobile or text each other for months and live alive without each other. it is very hard to do that but some has too (like i do). but now i am unable to do so. its been months i have not seen. also its been years.. we are in relation and not getting married.. i am really missing her alot. have you found your self under such circumstances or not? if yes, what do you do?? how do you manage then? can you give me some tips huh?? Explain Thanks
8 responses
@zralte (4186)
• India
5 Jun 10
It is not strange or uncommon. It happened everywhere in the world. The reason may be different from person to person. Long distance relationships are never easy. It is becoming easier these days with internet and mobile phone. Though nothing really beats the physical presence. I remember I used to have a long distance relationship while I was in college. Those days, internet was not as common as it is now. And mobile phones were available only for the rich people. Some relationships do not stand the test of distance and break up. Others break up after being together again and finding that the other changed or that they have nothing in common anymore. The only thing that will hold together is the love you shared and yes, communication is important. If you really love each other, then I am sure you will go through it and get to the day when you can marry her and then be together.
• Pakistan
5 Jun 10
thanks for your response and yes, you are right in old days communicating with your loved ones was very very hard thing to do? letters sending and then one of the letter being caught by parents and blah blah blah hahhaha... take care of your self
@zralte (4186)
• India
5 Jun 10
You got me curious now. Why can't you see her? Is it because she is in a different city for whatever reason like studies or something? Or you are living in the same city but the family don't approve?
• Pakistan
5 Jun 10
yes, you are right same city may be 10 mins on bike. but families havent approved yet. its been 3 years her family is not approving me just because they dont like love marriages. they are very different from the people of now a days. they still believe that love marriages are not very secure and they break up fast.but they are wrong. i dont know how to deal with them
@dawnald (84155)
• Shingle Springs, California
7 Jun 10
I would find a way to move there or end the relationship. I don't think I could do the long distance thing for that long.
• Pakistan
7 Jun 10
it is not long distance she is in my city but we are unable to meet each other. thanks for your response
@evepin (723)
• Philippines
5 Jun 10
my husband and i have that kind of set up... he works onboard a vessel so he's always away most of the time. we compensate by talking as much as possible: text, calls, video calls, emails, ym. it is very hard but either we accept and make the most of what we got or always be frustrated and grow apart. of course we chose the first one. cheers!
• Pakistan
5 Jun 10
yes, you are right and i wish he finds a good and Job which is near with you so you both can meet daily and live together happily take care of your self
@cupkitties (6804)
• United States
5 Jun 10
No its actually not all that strange. What about people who have a loved one in the military? or someone who is married to a doctor? Best thing I could think to do is keep yourself busy. You can't do mobile or text but what about writing? I mean ok I know thats kind of prehistoric but they still make stamps, they still make paper...so write to her, send her pictures or poetry. Some military wives that I know got a support group together and they hang out with each other. Maybe you could do something like that.
• Pakistan
5 Jun 10
no no. i said we only have contact with each other only through mobile.. i cant write her any thing her family will kill her hhahaha. she uses mobile secretly hehehe thanks for the nice advice
• Malaysia
5 Jun 10
Well i don't but what you could do is to think of her as often as possible.If possible,go meet her,dude!
• Pakistan
5 Jun 10
dude.. what are you saying?? it is not possible for me meet her i have told you in the discussion hehehe thanks for the response
• Philippines
5 Jun 10
I think if I'm in your situation i will do a lot of things to see my love and take good care of the one I love.. but in your situation, this is normal and common as you say so.. so you must wait.. patience is a virtue.. if you love that person, prove to him/her that you are still waiting until the end and you are decided to marry him/her the most important in the relationship is trust faith and love.. trust that person so that you will not think any doubt in your relationships..
• Pakistan
5 Jun 10
yes, you are right i have no doubt on her. never.. i lover her alot and i trust her like i trust my Mom. and she knows it too. but the most important thing is that i need her with me. i am tired of my life with out her
@vandana7 (58770)
• India
4 Jun 10
Hi Nina - no I didnt find myself in this situation. Does she not have access to computers? Wish things work out for you dear bro. You are so much in love!
• Pakistan
5 Jun 10
well. she has access but she is not allowed to use internet. in university she is allowed to use internet but she is not allowed to use messenger and also i am in school at that time too. i mean on Job. so our time is not matching. thanks for your response
@catdla1 (6005)
• United States
4 Jun 10
I'm not too sure that it is all that uncommon, although perhaps as a result of different circumstances (beliefs vs. distance), the times spent apart are the same. With the advent of the internet many people are 'meeting' and eventually getting married, but see very little of each other in between the introduction and the wedding. I met my husband online, and saw him in person only fleetingly until we got married. Living in different parts of the country, it wasn't easy to meet in person. I imagine it's even harder for people in different countries.Even going back in time, people frequently met through correspondence and didn't meet in person until they married, or perhaps shortly before. Now we have telephones and computers to keep in touch. There was a time when communications was only through the postal service, or sending messages with travelers. Can you imagine that? One thing I liked before my husband and I got married was to send some communications through the mail. When we weren't online or talking on the phone, it was nice to be able to read something he wrote, touch a paper that he did. And it was available whenever I needed it.
• Pakistan
4 Jun 10
humm.. you are right. but actually i really was missing her right now. and i had a paper today and i was very tired. also i was little upset. paper was very lengthy and time was too short. so was unable to finish it in time. and when you are down you need your partner to help you. that is what i needed. it is my first time i needed her to be with me :P