Can you please explain to me why she does this?
By cream97
@cream97 (29087)
United States
June 15, 2010 5:44pm CST
One of the things that can get on my nerves is when someone always has a question that they want to know about me. This is called being nosy. But there is one annoyance that my mother-in-law does. Before you jump to conclusions, please think very hard about this. Okay here goes: Every time that I go into the kitchen to get me something to drink or to eat. Or even if it was to fix something for my kids, my mother-in-law will come into the kitchen. I know that she has the right to come into her own kitchen and all, but does it have to be every time, that I am in there? I can say that she happened to get hungry or thirsty. But when she comes in the kitchen it is like each and every time that I have to go on there. Once she is in there, she will act like she wants something to eat or to drink. When I go in there, I am thinking, why does she have to be in the kitchen when I have to go in there? It is always, all of the time. Even when she has something cooking on the stove, she will come from out of her room like she is checking on the food in the pot. Any other time, when I am in the bedroom, she will not bother coming into the kitchen. It is only when she sees me in there. I say to myself sometimes, if she has to go into the kitchen then she should go in there when I am not in there. Why wait for me to come into the kitchen? I wished that she just won't wait around until I have to come into the kitchen instead. If she has to go in the kitchen when I am not in there, then by all means, do so! Don't wait until I come in there!
This is how it goes if you all have gotten confused. When I have to go into the kitchen she will always come in there. But when I am in my bedroom she stays in her bedroom.... She only moves when she has seen that I have moved. Surely she does not have to come into the kitchen all of the time when I have to come in there??
This is how it goes if you all have gotten confused. When I have to go into the kitchen she will always come in there. But when I am in my bedroom she stays in her bedroom.... She only moves when she has seen that I have moved. Surely she does not have to come into the kitchen all of the time when I have to come in there??5 people like this
13 responses
@walijo2008 (4644)
• United States
16 Jun 10
She's probably watching you to see what your doing, and if you clean up your mess, after your done. She's probably just waiting for you to mess up so she can say something to you and make you feel bad. Since its her house and her kitchen, she feels she needs to keep an eye on things and on you, it would be hard to share a kitchen with another woman.
2 people like this
@Kashmeresmycat (6369)
• United States
15 Jun 10
That would DRIVE ME CRAZY! She's checking up on you isn't she? She wants to see what you are doing in there so she's not fooling anyone.
What if you went in there and as soon as she comes in, just leave. Wait till she leaves then go back in. When she comes in, leave again, haha. Maybe you should try to drive her nuts for once. I feel so sorry for you creme.
1 person likes this
@Kashmeresmycat (6369)
• United States
15 Jun 10
You're not still living there are you? Why was I under the impression that you moved. I guess I'm losing it or I'm reading too many other discussions and getting everyone confused, haha.
If you are still living there, I would do this over and over and over again. I think it would be hysterical, and you could go back to your bedroom and laugh your head off, lol! 
1 person likes this
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
15 Jun 10
Hi, Kashmeresmycat. You know, I actually left and came back again.. When she would come into the kitchen I would leave. That would let her know that I know what she is doing. But I have not made it into a repetitious kind of thing. I may have to though.
1 person likes this
@scarlet_woman (23465)
• United States
18 Jul 10
my mother does this too-even tho i have told her to stay out of the kitchen while i'm doing something.
god help me if she wanders in while i'm chopping something,y'know?
it's a narrow kitchen.
i'm beginning to think they all do that.
it's a narrow kitchen.
i'm beginning to think they all do that.1 person likes this
@lealuvy2j (1986)
• Philippines
18 Jun 10
Whoa! From what you have said, I think she does not trust you enough to be around her food. Maybe she thinks you will poison her or something if you are alone there. lol! 
However, I think you should ask your partner what he thinks about his mother's actions. If he sees nothing wrong about it, tell him that it really makes you feel uncomfortable and tell him to check it out when he is there. Maybe, he can give you advice on what to do or how to act if this happens again. I hope I helped! 
However, I think you should ask your partner what he thinks about his mother's actions. If he sees nothing wrong about it, tell him that it really makes you feel uncomfortable and tell him to check it out when he is there. Maybe, he can give you advice on what to do or how to act if this happens again. I hope I helped! 1 person likes this
@Cutie18f (9551)
• Philippines
15 Jun 10
I think she is doing routine check. LOL. It seems to me that your mom-in-law is policing the food in the kitchen. She seems to be afraid that you are going to eat everything there and leave nothing for everyone. LOL. That would be the impression she would give me if I were in that situation. So the next time she checks on you in the kitchen, try eating all the food and see what she will say. You will probably get something from her. She's one greedy and suspicious momma.
1 person likes this
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
15 Jun 10
Hi, Cutie18f. That is the same thing that I am thinking too!! I have my own food and she knows that. Whenever she sees me in the kitchen, I am eating something that is mines and not theirs. It is so damn annoying when she does this. It makes me feel like she can't trust me or something.
I have my own food and she knows that. Whenever she sees me in the kitchen, I am eating something that is mines and not theirs. It is so damn annoying when she does this. It makes me feel like she can't trust me or something.1 person likes this
@moondancer (7433)
• United States
16 Jun 10
She may only think of going in the kitchen for this or that when someone else goes in there. Some people are this way. She could be forgetful.
Then there is the other side of the coin, maybe she wants to know what all you are getting. This could be for more than one reason. She may be keeping track of what she needs to buy next and when things run out she can make a mental not of it or if she keeps a list.
Then again from the way you take about how she is, she could be keeping track of what you and your children eat or anyone else that goes into her kitchen.
I mean think of the person you are talking about. She does not even want to feed her own son. She won't even let him in during the severe cold or heat.
Just be glad she even allows you into her kitchen for anything! I'm shocked that she does.
1 person likes this
@xfallenxlostx (2074)
• United States
16 Jun 10
I think you are making a mountain out of a molehill. I also think that you are completely mistaken about your mother-in-law's activities. I can guarantee you that she goes intot he kitchen plenty of times when you are not in there. You aren't at home 24/7 or out in the main area of the house 24/7. You don't know what she does when you're not there to see. And honestly, even if she WAS going in every time you are, what does it matter? If you aren't do anything wrong and have nothing to hide, it shouldn't bother you. I honestly think you just do not like your mother-in-law and are looking for faults to blame your dislike on. If you really have much a problem with her, sit down and respectfully talk to her, woman to woman, and come to some mutual conslusion.
@cortjo73 (6498)
• United States
17 Jun 10
Sorry but it sounds like she doesn't trust you or something. Or, she is keeping tabs on what you eat and drink in case something happens between you and your spouse. Then she can say "You ate and drank this much of my food, you owe me this much". Have you tried talking to your spouse about it? It is peculiar that she keeps going into the kitchen each time you are in there.
The only other thing I can imagine is that she is lonely and hopes to sit down and talk to you for a little while. Maybe she just doesn't know how to ask. I don't know. That is the only other reason I can imagine for her behavior.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
16 Jun 10
hi cream it looks like she is policing you and that's bordering on mental illness. my lord, like you explained you have your own food, how petty can that woman get? I am glad you were able to move away from that. To 'be watched like that all the time would drive me bananas too. that is just awful. I think I would have said, " do you not trust me? relax I
'am fixing my own food, so don't
fret it." Maybe that would have stopped her being the police.
fret it." Maybe that would have stopped her being the police.1 person likes this
@insulin (2479)
• Philippines
16 Jun 10
Well my dad is like that to all of my brother-in law lol and that is the reason why my sisters moved out to our hourse because of these reasons.It made them annoyed too that someone and every time is guarding them or every move they make and feels like your in a cage and a person keeps watching you all the time.
I know how it feels and it's also pissing me off.
1 person likes this
@jennyze (7029)
• Indonesia
16 Jun 10
Sounds to me like she is hiding something in the kitchen and she does not want you to find it out accidentally. Well, if this bothers you, try talking to her about this. You may get some results - she will still follow you into the kitchen but at least she will restraint herself to not going there every time you go.
1 person likes this
@vanity666 (258)
• Spain
16 Jun 10
i think she wants to know what you eat, maybe because she has too much free time and you are the only person she can molest,lol or check if you eat her food, that would be very selfish and sick ¬¬
1 person likes this
