Does it ever stop hurting?

I've lost 3 pregnancies.. one when my oldest was about 3.. one when my twins were about 1.. and the most recent was last August. I've actually found each lost pregnancy to be a blessing. I was not ready to have another child at the time of these pregnancies. The first time I was only 20, the child would have been born just before my 21st birthday. I was too young and immature to raise the child I had let alone another one, plus the relationship I was in was a very bad one. If I'd had that child I never would have ended up with my husband and I'd still be stuck with that loser I was with at the time. The second obviously I wasn't ready for another child after the twins.. I was hoping to be done with kids at that point. When I found out I was pregnant with Aydan I was half hoping for another miscarriage.. which didn't happen obviously. Don't get me wrong, it didn't take long for me to be happy about another baby.. I just didn't want it at first. The last one was an ectopic, which forced me to finally have my tubes removed.. which I probably never would have gotten around to doing if it hadn't been for the ectopic. I believe everything happens for a reason. I was meant to have 5 kids, for whatever reason... and I wasn't meant to have 8, thank goodness.

First off, I am sorry for your loss and your pain. This pain is very real and is something only a mother, who has experienced this, will understand. Unfortunately I know it all too well. I have buried 3 children and have had two miscarriages. I love children. I would do anything to have a million if possible. I had a daughter before all this and one in the middle of it. I am high risk and have had to experience much to find this information out. To answer your question D No it will never go away. It changes to sadness. Even though it was more than ten years since my boys passed, I still wonder what if. I think we always will. I get so MAD when people say "You have two other children", or "look on the bright side". Just what exactly is the bright side of losing a child. The comment that really bothers me is when you're talking to another mother and she saids "well at least it wasnt born". The minute that child was conceived it was OURS. If you ever need to talk please send me a private message and Ill give you my number or whatever. Dont feel bad about grieving. For some people it takes a lifetime. I can only tell you that you should let yourself feel sad. You need to. Good luck Dl

I am sorry Dora. Do not know what to say but I just dropped in to give a big hug dear. You will be fine dear. Lots of love.

I haven't ever lost a child, and my condolences to you, but I don't think it ever totally stops hurting when you lose somebody you love, especially a child.

Sorry to hear that you went through that. I know it must be hard for you. I would think that the pain never really goes away but it does get better and easier to deal with. Just try to remember that God had a reason for the way things turned out.

I don't have children. But as a mom i think it's hurt for a long time. Every mom know what's the pain is for a child. I hope someday the hurting is over. Just think that God help always and he is always there.

i had a miscarriage between our two daughters and while it was tough, it was probably for the best on a number of levels. for me, it happened about 14 years ago and while i dont feel pain, i do wonder what the child would have been like.