Do you think the kids are obliged to help the parents when they graduated?

@insulin (2483)
Philippines
June 17, 2010 8:47am CST
This was a topic in the radio this morning and we also discussed it in the house today together with my mom and there are parents putting the obligation of them to their kids.There are some parents here in our place forcing their kids to help them with some responsibilites in the house and for me,I think it is the initiative of the child if he or she will help his or her parents after the parents do anything just to make sure that they are living well.For me of course if you see your parents having difficulties why not help them in many ways,financially or emotionally as long this is help from the heart.What is your opinion about this?
1 person likes this
23 responses
@tomitomi (5441)
• Singapore
17 Jun 10
Anyone in the right frame of mind would have helped. If you think a lot of your success has got to do with the financial help you received from your parents while studying it is pay-back time. It's not just an obligation it's a must.
1 person likes this
@insulin (2483)
• Philippines
17 Jun 10
Thanks for the great opinion tomitomi.
• Philippines
17 Jun 10
this would depend on your culture. in my opinion it is the kids' prerogative if she/he wants to. it is stated in the bible that parents obligation is to raise, nurture, take care and provide to their children. so kids are not obliged to return the hardship their parents had given them. if the parents are having difficulties, it is fine to help them out. but kids are not obliged to.
@insulin (2483)
• Philippines
17 Jun 10
I do agree with you jeanne.Kids are not obliged to but it's kid's prerogative.
• Philippines
18 Jun 10
I don't think it is an obligation, but I do believe that once you graduate, atleast have the initiative to give some money to pay the bills or the groceries. I mean, you should not be obliged, but you should initiate and help even if it's little. And yeah, if the parent is already having a hard time with the expenses, and you have extra money, why not help right? It's the least you can do to thank them for all that they have done for you since you were born till you graduated from college.
18 Jun 10
I think it is only fair since parents/guardian etc., have given us a life. I agree with many here!) to give something back, money or other means including those who have gone to university.
@goldeneagle (6775)
• United States
25 Jun 10
Actually, I think they are obligated to get the hell out of the house and get a life of their own
• Indonesia
22 Jun 10
Well, why not help your parents if you can, there's nothing wrong with that. I am a parent already but when my child grow up, I won't force them to help me. It's so much better to see her having a good job and financially stable. If the parents keep on forcing their kid to help them, then when will they have their own money?
@p3ks626 (6550)
• Philippines
21 Jun 10
Its not an obligation but its an initiative. I think it also depends on the family cause there are families who send their eldest child to school and when he or she is done, his or her obligation now is to sent the other siblings to school. When I had my first job, I helped my mom pay bills. I know she can afford to pay the bills cause she still works and earns every month but I gave her money for the bills cause its on way for me to help the family. Now that I am married and my husband and I also have our own responsibility in paying our bills, we still give some amount of money to our parents to help pay their bills as well.
• United States
20 Jun 10
I have one daughter I have raised. The only thing I hope and pray for is her keeping me out of a nursing home. I plan to care for myself my entire life and hope she can do the same fro herself. I don't feel she is obligated to do anythng for me but keep my elderly body safe from the nursing home and it's abuse. I love my daughter and hope she loves me this much later on.
@epicure35 (2822)
• United States
20 Jun 10
I think that families should always help each other when they can. Some parents do not need financial help at one or another points of their lives. But, if and when they do, a child should help out. If parents are able to help their children save money for their future, they should. But, adult children should also learn the rudiments of financial responsibility. As we get older, those of us who have been the nurturers may need nurturing ourselves and that help can be financial or just plain love, caring, and help with chores, etc.
@hanizah (256)
19 Jun 10
I agree to what you have said.The parent should not force their children anymore because it should be the initiative of the child to help their parents in anyway that they can do.
• United States
18 Jun 10
i belive that is you our done with school and your working and living at home still then yes you should pay rent to your parents they have worked all there life to take care of you so if you pay rent maybe that will open up more money for them and they will be able to get extra thing they have gone with out
• China
18 Jun 10
In my opinion,we children should help our parents when we gtatuated,we're not children that we have right to say I'm not able to do it or that.we are adults that we are resbonsability to help our parents ,just because they are old ,they gave us good conditions to grow up.
@charylady (424)
• Philippines
18 Jun 10
i don't think parents should oblige their children to help. but it would really make the parents feel good if their children offered to help (financially or in other capacities). if the parents are in dire need, then i think it is the duty of the adult children to help; after all who else will help your parents if you don't? remember, your parents sacrificed a lot to raise you and provide for you, so in their old age, it is but proper for you to care for them.
@RobtheRock (2485)
• United States
18 Jun 10
I agree with you Insulin. Once the child left the household, he or she has a future family to work on or a future mate or future goals. I feel bad because I don't help my sister care for my mother. But as old as I am, I still have hopes of meeting that special lady and raising a small family. But I need money which I don't have. So I spend my time trying to make money any way I can legally And most of these ventures are on the Internet. It's hard to get a job which makes things worse. So my sister is left caring for my mother. To be honest, I don't feel as bad as most people would because I was raised by my grandparents. Of course I'm glad my mother had me instead of an abortion. But in no way do I feel obligated to be there caring for my mother. I love her and want to do more, but I goals and my time is running out.
@med889 (5958)
18 Jun 10
I think they are not obliged at all but they should be knowing atleast their duty of care toward the parents financially and morally. They should perform every actions towards the parents selflessly so be able to be both happy and contented.
• Philippines
18 Jun 10
as most of the users had stated it depends on your culture most western countries when kids graduated they live on their own but if you really love your parents who gave supported you from the beginning then i think its only fair that you should help them out when you are capable of doing it. In my personal opinion culture should not stop you from doing something what you think is right since from the beginning parents are like shoulders we always rely on now that we can repay them for their help even in a small way why not do it well its just my opinion.
• India
18 Jun 10
i feel kids to look after there parents, since parents looked after us when we were kids..........
• Philippines
18 Jun 10
hi insulin.. i dont think so,, but if your child helps you well you are lucky to have a child like this but our children are not obliged to help us if they have their own money from having a job after they graduated.. it is our duty as parents to give our children a great future and helping us back are their own choice not ours..
@don_naces (464)
• Philippines
18 Jun 10
I do agree with you that it is the initiative of the child to help his or her parents. Why not help them if they are in need. In the first place, you would never be here in this world without your parents. You will not achieve all the accomplishments that you have right now without their support. It is very true that there are some parents who do expect help from their children. For them, they love having many children so that when they are already old, a lot of their children will help them.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
18 Jun 10
Your children will always be your children. It doesn't make a difference how old they are. Your children should care enough about you to want to help you. They shouldn''t have to feel obligated. Just because they have graduated from school changes nothing. They are growing up. That means knowing your responsibilities. Helping out a parent should be on that list.
@edorms36 (267)
• United Arab Emirates
18 Jun 10
It is not an obligation to help parents back but it is a responsibility for us as good children to see to it that our parents are in good health and living a decent life it is a way to return the favors and as a good natured person we have to be grateful to what our parents have done for us and in return give them back what is due them, the love and care that was also showered on us when we are youngsters.