A relationship of only three days.... can you imagine that???

Pakistan
June 19, 2010 1:45am CST
I found a very good friend here and thought she can be a very good friend of me in the future. it was not like gf and bf. just friends. she was very interested in this friendship and was giving lot of time. chat chat chat and was very impressed by me she was happy to have me and one day she came and started saying so many things against my religion and told me that she is not looking forward for any friendship?? what was that?? does friendship has any concern with the religion??? or if we are from different religions we cant be friends?? we cant share our views and cant have any things between us?? she was very interested in my religion too but what happened to her in a single night?? do you think some one has washed her brain?? and added things against us or may be me?? what will you think about that?? have you ever had such friend in your life?? have you faced such problem in any of your relationship?? or i have any problem?? but how i have any problem she was very very impressed by me?? then what happened to her?? some one felt jealous of us and made her against us?? huh?? what do you say??
5 people like this
24 responses
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
19 Jun 10
Sweetie, that was very childish of her. I don't care what a person's religion, culture or the other bla bla bla bla's are. For me it is the person who is important. Maybe you are better off without her. Friends need to accept people as they are, religion and all. TATA.
1 person likes this
• Pakistan
19 Jun 10
yes, that is what i think too. but why is she doing like this? ok i will be away from her. May be ALLAH wants me to be away from her?? she might not be suitable friend for me. but still i am not sure why she personally did this
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (68621)
• India
19 Jun 10
Saphy when you talk intelligently, I get indigestion!
1 person likes this
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
19 Jun 10
Sweetie, don't brake a sweat about this. Just leave her alone, okay. Vannie, i did it just for you.
1 person likes this
@sid556 (31003)
• United States
19 Jun 10
Hi nina khan, I think that as you got to know your friend, her true colors became apparent. I don't think she changed overnight at all. That doesn't happen to people. What happened was that you suddenly got to see the real her. Religion should not have anything to do with a friendship. A good friend will still be your good friend despite differing religious paths. Sadly, for some people it does matter and I am not really sure why. On the remote thought that perhaps someone was jealous of your friendship and brainwashed her then you have to ask yourself if you would even want to be very involved with a person whose mind and loyalty is so weak that they could that easily be controlled.
1 person likes this
• Pakistan
22 Jun 10
yes, you are right thanks for your response
@yresh12 (3219)
• Philippines
19 Jun 10
Hi khan! Don't worry about it. That person is not worth your time and friendship. their are lots of people here in mylot who are worth your time and don't judge you base on religion or looks. Just be happy and stay that way.
1 person likes this
• Pakistan
22 Jun 10
thanks for your response take care
@silvercoin (2101)
• Lithuania
19 Jun 10
People who end their relationship so quick are simple liars.Three days sound like a very short time to know someone.I believe it takes years to know a person.But it takes only a few seconds to fall in love, and it takes only one word to kill love and friendship sometimes.Things like religion,politics, family and love are very delicate things.People should be very careful discussing these things with others. Religion isn't a problem in a relationship unless someone makes it a problem.It's like favorite music or books.It's like rejecting friends because they read something else, or listens to a different kind of music.That's just sick. Look, Nina.This friend isn't a friend if she makes you feel this way.Have you heard about damaged people?Some people bring just pain and sorrow, they're incapable for normal relationship.Being kind and intelligent, you should just sent this evil hearted person away.Don't waste your time and heart on her.
1 person likes this
• Pakistan
22 Jun 10
thanks for your response and thanks for being part of my live :) take care
@veejay19 (3592)
• India
19 Jun 10
Well nina bhai, i am as perplexed as you are.In true friendship religion is not an obstacle.I have friends from all religions, at least most of them and this factor has never come into it.Since you say that this girl was not from your religion and she had a very positive reaction even after knowing fully well that both of you did not follow the same faith.I think that either her parents or some friends must have dissuaded her from going ahead as yours is a conservative society and relationships with persons fro other religions are not welcomed in your country. Probably she must have been told that if she persists with the friendship then it could land her as well as you in deep trouble.Well, just forget about it and go ahead with your life, You will find better friends as you progress in life.
1 person likes this
• Pakistan
19 Jun 10
thanks veejay bhaya!! well you are right but she is not even from asia, she is from Europe and she called her self very open minded and is this an open minded person?? i dont know how people call them selves open minded with such things?? thanks for your response (hahha nina bhai :P)
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (68621)
• India
19 Jun 10
Religion would never be a ground for me to break a friendship, because I relate to god at a much deeper level than any scriptures define. So that is rubbish. But I have a confession. A few of my friendships or relationships have been that short-lived, with me doing the walk away. It is like this nina - we all have somethings that we cant really adjust to at all. I cant stand selfishness, inconsiderate or unjust behavior, and a few other things. The friends that I left high and dry were unfortunate that their nature was exposed before it became anything serious. I felt bad but I couldnt bring myself to make it a gentle break because they themselves had not been gentle with others. Hope you can understand that!
• Pakistan
19 Jun 10
yes, i am getting your point which you are trying to say here. i am also unable to understand what is all that?? i was very socked on her such behaviour with me. i wasnt not expecting that from her at all. thanks for your response
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jun 10
O.O Wow...that is just wrong. There is a chance that she felt against your religion, but was still okay with being friends with you. Then I guess if she talked with her friends and family, there is a chance they caused it to happen more than someone who was jealous. Someone who is jealous shouldn't be able to brainwasher that easily. I hope you make up.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jun 10
I wouldn't think religion would have any impact on a good friendship. Perhaps if you were to someday think of marriage if the relationship goes further then perhaps religion would be an issie. But not now.
1 person likes this
@KrauseHome (35514)
• United States
17 Sep 10
Unfortunately Religion is a big breaker these days when it comes to friendships and how they are formed and how long they last. For many people if someone is being too pushy about something, or definately believes a lot differently than I do and keeps on trying to push my beliefs then they are not worth my time. Personally most of the time the people I choose to become friends with and stay friends with are open and willing to listen when it might be something I believe in.
• Pakistan
19 Sep 10
Hi dear friend. but what will you do if those friends of you listens to you for some time and after some time they come and tell you that you want to leave your friendship because you belong to such religion and all that, that will really hurt you at that time. and will not be able to settle for some time that is how people do now a days
• Canada
29 Jun 10
You all are full of It. The real answer is that Religion DOES matter. Don't get me Wrong She did a Bad thing, however every person on the planet has an opinion about God so Get over it. She May well have been Thinking about more than a "Friendship" with you. The bible says Friendship with the world Is enmity with God. That's all I got. Oh and how does one get their brain washed anyhow. I might give it a try!
• Pakistan
2 Jul 10
I dont believe in that saying that FRIENDSHIP with world is enmity with ALL i dont know about the new bible which people have changed and it is not in original form too.. but in our religion it is said and it is taught that Friend ship is very important part of the life
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
24 Jun 10
I wouldn't let religion get in the way of a friendship unless the other person was trying to force their religion on me. What happened to her? Well, either religion really is that important to her or there is something else about you that she doesn't like and she is using that as an excuse. But unless she will tell you honestly, that is all just speculation.
• Pakistan
26 Jun 10
thanks for your response and luckily the problem has been resolved now. i am happy for that
@dierdre (2213)
• Philippines
23 Jun 10
Maybe that girl has found some of your beliefs to be against what she believes in that's why she started thrash talking your religion. If i were you, just ditch her, leave her alone, she is not worth it to be your friend, coz if she was a true friend, she would accept you for what you are, and religion and any other cultural differences wont matter.
• Pakistan
24 Jun 10
thanks for your reponse
@smartjack (521)
• India
21 Jun 10
oh, so many questions running in your mind brother. And it is right to have so many questions. You have the right to know what happened suddenly. How can things change straight away in a single night. This is absolutely wrong. She should have not done this to you. At least she should have given you some explanation for this. You have the right to know the reason behind the trouble. I have never come across such a situation in life.
• Pakistan
24 Jun 10
thanks for your response. the problem has been resolved
@meemingNEW (2228)
• Philippines
20 Jun 10
My understanding about your situation is that a friend of yours whom you met online just can't keep a friendship with you because you're different in terms of religion. I guess she just came to a realization that a person's religion is a factor for her for a friendship to work out. And you just have to accept her decision no matter how indecisive she was at the start. She confuses me really since I never met someone like your friend. I guess her acts can possibly came from someone who told her things against your religion or maybe it was her upbringing in the first place. I suggest you'll just have to accept, move on, learn from it and for sure, you'll find a better friend than she ever was. Best of luck
• Pakistan
24 Jun 10
thank you very much for you response
@annjilena (5620)
• United States
19 Jun 10
friends don,t do that they respect whatever your religion happens to be.friends is not judge mental of each other iam sure there is something between you two she related too.we have to remember to choose our friends wisely.
• Pakistan
22 Jun 10
every one says that but what is the method to test some friend and see is he/she is loyal or not?? i need some suggestions
@catdla1 (6005)
• United States
19 Jun 10
Hi Nina! Sorry that you've had that kind of experience. It's that kind of shallowness that causes problems and lack of understanding between peoples with different faiths. Whatever her faith is, or lack of, is not very well shown in her actions. But I wouldn't worry about it...it's her loss of a terrific friendship. Your heart was in the right place, and despite things like this happening once in a while, I hope you keep the kind and open heart that you have.
• Pakistan
22 Jun 10
ok i will try my best my darling :) take care of your self thanks for your response
@MDG2211 (711)
• Argentina
13 Jul 10
If it is a very difficult situation, the environment influences very much, that is to say surely that they filled the head, because if really he was feeling something very strong for vos, the topic of the religion cannot be a motive of break, or to there be able to be a third party, it never knows one, but in your particular case it has to be being influenced by his people.
• Portugal
9 Jul 10
maybe someone used her account and entered and talked with you pretending it was her. bcs is strange if she liked you so much and even your religion why would she suddenly say bad things about it? i think that someone did that and not her. anyway im very sorry that you lost a good friend bcs of this :( anyway if someone used her account that person was very mean :(
• Canada
20 Jun 10
I think you were dealing with a person that was not sure or strong in conviction of her own values and what she believed. It SOUNDS like she decided to listen to someone elses biased opinions about Islam, I am assuming here that you are, well honestly because of the beard dude. lol. And also because Islam is a target for ignorant people to fire off biased opinions, mostly from what they are seeing in the media. It's a hot spot right now so to speak so people have very black and white views about your religion and many are not willing to entertain open discussion or the grey areas. I would say just move on from people like this because there are alot of us out there who are mature, open minded etc. that you could be befriending. Hope that helps. Cheers! Female from Canada.
• United States
20 Jun 10
No, I don't think religion had anything to do with it. Maybe she simply did not want to continue the friendship. I feel she was actually looking for a relationship, but you made it clear that you saw her just as a friend. And you know many people who become friends with the opposite gender do it just so things move to the next level. So for her, what is the point of being in friendship with you if she can't climb the ladder? In short, she thought of you as a waste of time. Meanwhile, she did not have a proper excuse to tell you that upfront. So she used your religion as an excuse. Now she must be hunting for other men. I feel she likes to play games. It is good that you did not want anything to do with her.