I'm hurting inside.....

@maean_19 (4662)
Philippines
June 29, 2010 3:23am CST
My boyfriend was out of the metro for 3 days from Friday to Sunday. When he was out, I am actually suffering with hormonal imbalance for 2 weeks long and getting week. What hurts me more though is that he seldom send me a message or call me up how am I going. I have to go to the clinic alone last Saturday. When he arrived Sunday night, Cutting the story short, we were actually fine since he arrived till early last night. He was the one who cooked for dinner. When we were going to sleep, since I am still weak, he lets me sleep ahead and not to wait for him. But, how can I sleep when I hear message tones every minute. He is texting someone and it took him to sleep till almost 4 in the morning texting that girl. I had insufficient sleep too and I am hurting inside because he is so insensitive not to be concern with my feeling. I think he was aware that I am hurting and feeling bad because I am treating him cold like I don't allow him to embrace or wrap his arms around me. He also cooked breakfast for us perhaps to freshen my mood. But, that is not it. Why do guys are like that? They seem to be so insensitive and does not care at all about our feelings. They want us to tell everything before they get the point.
4 people like this
14 responses
• Philippines
29 Jun 10
because us guys... we're really just simple creatures. no matter how many college degrees we achieve... when it comes to girls and emotions we barely get a passing grade. So forgive us for being dull and insensitive... we are emotionally impaired. So lay it out on us... with the little details and bullet points to get your point across instead of waiting for us to get the little body signals you give out. we'll never get it
2 people like this
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
29 Jun 10
But you are not that stupid, right? Then, why is it that you are so rude? And selfish? You want out attention and appreciation, but have a hard time doing that to us?
• Philippines
29 Jun 10
oh, chipes i think you have touch a nerve. be very careful. I believe men weren't trained that way. sometimes, i wonder, have you ever known you're guy to be sensitive when you met him? i don't know but i hope thigns work on both of you.
1 person likes this
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
2 Jul 10
I want to correct a topographical error with my response.. "But you are not that stupid, right? Then, why is it that you are so rude? And selfish? You want our attention and appreciation, but have a hard time doing that to us?" The above is for chipester. For Letranknight, I've known my guy to be sensitive. Sensitive which means easily pained or annoyed. Well, so far, we are ok right now. He is being sweet again and do some making up.
• United States
29 Jun 10
I don't know what to tell you. It sounds like your having a really hard time right now. You should have asked him to turn down his phone. I don't think that would have been to bad. He could then text and drop a sleep.
2 people like this
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
29 Jun 10
I really do not know why he can't avoid texting that girl till after midnight. I assumed he can sense that I am awake and gets irritated. I just hope he'll make it up tonight. Thanks for that advise my friend.
• Philippines
30 Jun 10
there are mens like that... but you should ask who is it,he should take care of you instead of txting, well i guess the opinion i can give is that..you should have a talk i mean one on one talk...sort things out
1 person likes this
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
30 Jun 10
I guess, we do need to talk. I had been through a lot these past few days and got emotionally stressed. I hope it will be over really and he will make up. Thanks!
@eurekafemme (5881)
• Philippines
31 Jan 11
Hi, Maean. I see that this post is already 8 months old so I can not tell you anymore that you should talk to your boyfriend and tell him that you are resenting what he is doing. :) Probably, by now, you have settled this issue with your man, haven't you ? If the guy respects his woman and cares for her, he would do everything to make her feel ,at least respected and loved, thus he will be in tuned to her needs. I hope things are all well with you and your man, your health, too.
1 person likes this
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
31 Jan 11
Hi there Eureka! I remember about this post of mine. Although, I could no longer recall what was the result of that happening. Some issues though were not solved because of the guy's insensitivity and selfishness. The pain grew much that I could no longer bear it. Last December, we already separated. It was tough and saddening on my part because I love and loved him that much. But what is love for when it is no longer worth it fighting for?
• United States
30 Jun 10
i think that your hormonal imbalances are the main cause of your problems, which sucks cause there isnt anything you can do about it. and hes a good guy for waiting to text her till he thought you were sleeping, he wanted to keep it on the DL, so kudos to him. Maybe if you didnt give him the "cold shoulder" he would treat you like a human, tee hee.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
1 Jul 10
guys are always guys... They say, but for me, it is really one way of, as you already said, even the most Gentlemen of all, do things like that, because, to some instances, we might seem Awkward, and just trying "to Clear things out is a Pre-requisite"... that's all... MyLot Friends, Happy MyLoooting everyone....
• Philippines
29 Jun 10
almost all guys were insensitive.. you will never be understood unless you tell them what exactly is the problem..
1 person likes this
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
2 Jul 10
Thanks for commenting my friend. Anyways, I guess you are right. But it wonders me much is that, you can actually suspect that there is something wrong, but you never bother to ask why...
• Philippines
29 Jun 10
Sorry to ask but you said "Texting THAT GIRL?" hmm, who's girl, I thought your the ONLY one? who is not going to feel hurt when you knew him texting someone else, i really don't get it, don't mind me asking please. I just got irritated when your guy was texting someone else..but I don't know the whole story anyway ..
1 person likes this
@srganesh (6349)
• India
29 Jun 10
I think he has lost interest in you. By your own words, I understand that he didn't text you when he was out but never stop texting to another girl, even when you are ill. It is high time you should end that relationship. Otherwise you will be the sufferer.
1 person likes this
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
30 Jun 10
I never expected that there will be different opinions regarding this topic. Well, with respect to your comment, I remember not mentioning that my bf never sent me messages when he was out of the metro. He did text me, but not as often as I want to. I understand, it is an out of the metro trip. The texting to another girl is a different day which happened when he is with me and we are in the bed to sleep. I think it would be too early to decide for now to end the relationship for that reason alone. I guess, we need to talk and converse about the matter first before deciding to end the relationship. By the way, thank you for commenting, it is much appreciated.
• Philippines
29 Jun 10
Hello Maean, I got a bad feeling he's doing it on purpose, otherwise if he is not that stupid(no offense) then he could put that in the silent mode and continue texting. It seems that the two of you sleep together now you mention not allowing him to wrap his arms around you? why is that? you couldn't sleep with his arms, you can tell him that. Why don't you talk it out since you two are in the relationship. if you ask me, i believe such insensitivity is some thing that i got from my dad. besides, I too am sensitive why do i have to be sensitive to every one when every ELSE is they are too COLD to me.sometimes it's a unconscious physiological defense arises with or w/out awareness . I believe when ever you two talk just encourage him to get to the point so that it won't get ugly.that way you can sort of a solution instead having at each other all the time. at least he COOKs food. that's one hard thing to do.
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
30 Jun 10
Hello my friend! Glad you made a comment with my discussion. I am very much grateful because I can see different opinions about the topic and you got my attention with your first line. He might have done it in purpose, or perhaps waiting for me to initiate with the talking. But He let me go to sleep earlier and not to wait for him since I need sleep due to that iron deficiency. I know the girl she had been texting, and I hate it because he really can't dispatch her. Worse, I have to adjust everytime that girl textx him and call him up. Yeah, we are actually living together for almost 8 months now and we are used to sleep wrapping each other's arms. But that night, I did not allow him to wrap his arms around my body as cold treatment that I hate what he is doing and that I am hurting inside. I guess, he understood the cold treatment and trying to be sweet when we woke up. What I hate is that he never asks why. I don't know if it is really a guy thing that they have to wait for the girl to start the talking.
• United Arab Emirates
29 Jun 10
Guys are not always bad. I know waht you are going through right now. We guys do take some time to understand, I agree. But I think you should have given him a hint that you are getting disturbed bcos of the messages. He must have assumed that you are fast asleep bcos of your illness and you will not know anything. He loves you thats why he is taking care of you. What you can do is kindly tell him that the messgae tones were disturbing you last night. Say that without showing any further reaction.
1 person likes this
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
30 Jun 10
Hi there! I am not generalizing though that guys are bad all the time. Well, i gave him a hint that I am awake and that I am irritated with the texting thing. I am not actually disturbed with the text tone, rather the texting per se because they were texting till midnight. That is why I did a cold treatment to tell him that I am hurting with his behavior. I just hope he will not do that again. Wishing!
• Portugal
11 Jul 10
well i think you should talk with him and ask him who is that girl. if you are not happy you must tell him. in a relation you cant hide things. if you feel that he likes other girl why dont you ask him? you need his attention and his love. anyway maybe he wasnt texting a girl but you said those days he been away he didnt talk much with you? im sorry for it. anyway talk with him and tell him how you feel. maybe he wasnt texting a girl maybe was some friend he had and he talked a bit for not bother your sleep. but dont stop him to hug you and care for you without tell him how you feel or he might think you dont love him anymore :( and dont want him around.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
30 Jun 10
Men tend to be insensitive sometimes. That doesn't always mean though that he doesn't care at all. Maybe he's just too busy or maybe he's been thinking a lot about other stuffs lately. I suggest you talk to him about your feelings before coming-up with any conclusions. Communication is really important in any relationship. Good luck and I hope you two can work things out.
1 person likes this
@sid556 (31006)
• United States
30 Jun 10
Hi maean, I'm sorry but I'm a little confused with your story. You said he was up texting some girl. What girl and why was he texting her when he was with you?
1 person likes this
@jennyze (7048)
• Indonesia
30 Jun 10
I am lost here. Why was he texting a girl till morning? Is he having an affair with her? And why did you let him? Isn't it easier to ask him to stop and find out what was the reason?
1 person likes this
• Mexico
29 Jun 10
Hello, if not pleasant atitude that sometimes you have to a couple, and the problem of speaking the truth, we should be honest and provide a solution to such problems, because over time may be further exacerbated.
1 person likes this