Always put yourself in the other person's shoes

India
July 1, 2010 4:43am CST
Friends it is always easy to criticize, hurt others, but please, always put yourself in the other person's shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, then it’s probably does hurt the person too........ What is your view on this, do you criticize others, ever think it might hurt him/ her? Share your views. Professor
1 person likes this
18 responses
@neildc (16907)
• Philippines
12 Jul 10
i also agree prof. sometimes we can't help to criticize people but it will be better if we think more before talking and put ourselves in the situation.
2 people like this
• India
13 Jul 10
Thanks for response. Professor. .
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@dorannmwin (36610)
• United States
2 Jul 10
I think that you are exactly right here. I recently unintentionally hurt a friend of mine because I spoke without thnking about what I was saying. If I had taken the time to think about what it would seem like if I was in her shoes, then I would have never said the words that I used and then there wouldn't have ended up being a temporary riff in our relationship. Thankfully we have been able to work things out though, so I feel much better now.
2 people like this
• India
13 Jul 10
doran dear I am happy you are good friends again Thanks for sharing. Professor. .
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@Hatley (115420)
• Garden Grove, California
2 Jul 10
professor hi again oh my y es we must not judge people. we need to walk in our brother's shoes for a fortnight before lipping off about any thing. I try to live by what my mom taught me. Do unto others as you wold have them do unto you.The golden rule, the best rule to always live by.I try not to be super critical at all. I do not know other's circumstances so why judge. Judge not least you be judged. words to live by.
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• India
13 Jul 10
Thanks for the beautiful response . Professor. .
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@Hatley (115420)
• Garden Grove, California
18 Jul 10
hi hehe got the last word. You are most welcome Professor.
@Lakota12 (42794)
• United States
2 Jul 10
Just follow the golden rule do unto otehr that you wuold have them do unto you!
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• India
13 Jul 10
Nice words, welcome Professor. .
@Lakota12 (42794)
• United States
14 Jul 10
thanks
@annavi23 (6306)
• Philippines
1 Jul 10
yes,prof,you are absolutely right! don't judge a book by it's cover and do unto others what you wanted them to do to you. placing yourself in someone's shoes is really a must before criticizing them! you might feel worse if you put your shoe on them than criticize them.
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@annavi23 (6306)
• Philippines
2 Jul 10
yes,hearing those words makes someone really feel bad.i think if you could have no good to say about others,try to shut your mouth instead.or if it can't be prevented,if it is your friend,try to tell that person in a nice way for them not to hurt so bad. some may take it as a challenge.you know,it also depends on your attitudes and perceptions towards things around you.and if you try to think of positivities,you'll know how to react on things the better way for you not to be hurt. we should face all trials or ignore what others would say among us.
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
Thanks for sharing your views ann and joan.Welcome always.. Professor. .
@besthope44 (12149)
• India
21 Jul 10
Yes i always put myself in others place before letting out a word, cautious about it.
1 person likes this
• India
22 Jul 10
Thanks for response. Welcome. God bless you friend, cheers. Professor. .
@ongtina (1232)
• Singapore
2 Jul 10
Usually I don't say too much about other people, don't like it too when I hear my husband/family talking "bad" about another. I find it is bad, isn't right. I always feel we should look at our selves first , shouldn't be eyeing others' faults. Everyone has flaws, correct ours first, that should be the way.
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
None is perfect, none is flawless Thanks for response. Professor. .
@webzap (885)
• Philippines
2 Jul 10
I used to criticize but not outside of my family and some close friends only, other than that, I don't. But even though I do, I have to make it sure that what I offer is constructive criticism as this will be more acceptable to the person being criticized and won't hurt. Negative and nagging criticism ends up to a more misunderstandings and will not solve the problems laid.
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
Yes everybody will welcome constructive critisizm.. Thanks . Professor. .
@Pose123 (21677)
• Canada
2 Jul 10
Hi Professor, I totally agree with you, that is how we should all live. As you say it is very easy to criticize and usually we know very little about the other person's circumstances. Putting ourselves in their shoes will help us to understand better. I try not to criticize or judge anyone as I know that I'm not perfect and I would not like others to condemn me. I congratulate you on a good post. Blessings.
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
Thanks for the congrats Pose. I am happy you liked this, welcome. Professor. .
• United States
1 Jul 10
A lot of people will never understand another person's struggles Unless they walk in they shoes. Its really easy to criticize when you on the outside looking in but if u were in that person's shoes ya probably wouldn't know how to deal with it yourself
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
Welcome to mylot and my discussions Thanks for response. Professor. .
@rhodzptc (1319)
• Philippines
1 Jul 10
Thus making jokes is a part of criticizing someone? I always play jokes to one of my co worker and most of the time I tell to her that sometimes you need to put yourself in other person's shoes what would you feel? Then she will just laugh at it so for me that means he enjoys it that we make fun out of her. What do you think?
• India
13 Jul 10
You are right, many serious things can be communicated in a very light manner through jokes.. Thanks for response. Professor. .
@jaiho2009 (36773)
• Philippines
1 Jul 10
hello Proof, I do criticize people esp my friends. Criticizing doesn't mean rudeness,it depends on how we say it. We can say it nicely,surely it will hurt the concern,but we can explain it to give them some comfort. Sometimes,criticism is a must to make us realize our mistakes. I always do that my dear,putting myself into others shoes. That is why,i would rather hurt my friends with the truth,(with criticism)before others will do. Have a good day always
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
Hope your friends understand that.. Thanks for response. Professor. .
@Bellapop (1283)
1 Jul 10
Always treat others how you wish to be treated, that really goes and makes the world tick in a healthy way. I generally do try to see from the other person't point of view as it is also part of my job to do so, otherwise, I would be out of one very soon :)
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
Thanks for your views in this response. Professor. .
@kiran8 (12901)
• Mangalore, India
1 Jul 10
Yes I agree professor ! It is very easy to find fault and criticise others but it is not easy to be understanding about them.I do my fair share of criticism when I feel that the person deserves it but I also regret it later sometimes.On the whole I am not a very critical person,I hate being judgmental unless I too have been at the receiving end by that person...All the best , hope all fine with you...
• India
13 Jul 10
I am fine kiran, i think you are busy with your gardens Thanks for response. Welcome always. Professor. .
@qianyun6 (2071)
• China
1 Jul 10
I agree on this. There's an ancient saying "Do as you would be done by others." I take it as my motto and try my best to obey it. So I don't criticize others easily. I'll choose a euphemistic way if I feel it is necessary to criticize somebody.
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
That's so nice.. Thanks for response. Professor. .
@johnpillai (2083)
• Germany
1 Jul 10
Can you believe if i say that i don't criticize others. but it is true. I don`t criticize others. it is a matter of practice. once i did so as hoby. Little by little my thoughts has started to grow up as you says. it was not so difficult to give it up.
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
Thanks for response Mrs Pillai. Professor. .
@Buchi_bulla (8299)
• India
1 Jul 10
I always keep a check on my words. I am the last person to hurt anyone. But many hurt me. That is their nature, cannot help it. I always keep myself on the other person's position and think of the repurcussions of my talk or deed.
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
Let others be rude, one day or other they will realize, if we are decent and not rude to them.. Thanks for response. Professor. .
@ddaguno (3111)
• Philippines
1 Jul 10
I totally agree with you prof. Sometimes critcism is needed for improvement but we should criticize for development and not just to make someone feel bad.
1 person likes this
• India
13 Jul 10
Yes we can tell this in a friendly way , so that he/she does not feel hurt.. Thanks for response. Professor. .