I have a crush

By eM
@eLsMarie (4148)
Philippines
July 2, 2010 7:33pm CST
It is normal for me to have a crush with somebody knowing that I have a boyfriend? I really feel weird about it but I guess it's normal right?
1 person likes this
11 responses
@Memnon (2173)
3 Jul 10
It probably feels odd, but I see nothing wrong in it, provided that you don't act on it. Many of us, in our school years have had crushes on teachers or friend's mums etc, without thinking that it were anything more than a form of infatuation, when we look back.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
I'm really worried about my treatment with the other guy. They're very much different in so many damn ways.
@Memnon (2173)
4 Jul 10
That is a bit confusing- treatment with the other guy? Let me get this straight. You have a b/f, but fancy someone else. With you so far. Your treatment with the other guy. That baffles me. Are you dating both? Is your b/f treating you badly? Don't ever forget that men are different when they are trying to woo you than when they have you. If the other guy is trying to win you he may be all pandering & roses, whereas your b/f may be old news, and you are getting bored- maybe so is he? Am I somewhere along the right track?
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
6 Jul 10
I think you're right with your statement that I'm already getting bored Memnon. I don't why it happened or maybe I find my our relationship to be so dull already as compared to my relationship with the other guy. I can't somehow decipher what my feeling really is, all I know is I'm so confused.
@meirhu (367)
• Israel
3 Jul 10
It is VERY normal to have a crush on somebody even if you have a primary partner. Look at the statistics of Kinsey back in the 50's. He found that 70% of the men even then had an affair. This means that if someone DOESN'T have an affair this is NOT normal !!!
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
Really? Oh my God! Does that statistics exist until now?
@meirhu (367)
• Israel
4 Jul 10
NO WAY. The percentage is definitely much much higher and for women AS WELL. I don't know what they are, but I'm certain that they're much higher.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
6 Jul 10
Oh my God! It's happening to me already. I never had this experience with my former relationships from where I became attracted to somebody else. I think there's already something wrong with me meirhu.
@dpk262006 (56563)
• Delhi, India
3 Jul 10
I would say that please do not feel guilty about having a crush on someone, who is other than your boy friend. After all you are a normal human being and we all have crush on some celebrities etc.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
Yah... If I tell my boyfriend that I have a crush on someone, I know that he'll be angry at me. Hiding it from him, would it be considered as cheating?
@dpk262006 (56563)
• Delhi, India
6 Jul 10
I do not think that hiding about your crush, from your friend will be termed as 'cheating', you have a crush on the other person, you are not 'going' with him?
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
9 Jul 10
I use to hang out with the other guy but we're not alone. Would that be okay?
• Portugal
5 Jul 10
well i dont know maybe your bf doesnt give you enough attention or you admire that guy that you have crush on that you wished your bf was like him sometimes that happen. anyway dont feel guilty you are not like cheating your bf i think maybe you just wish your bf was a bit like that guy. maybe that guy is caring and sweet and your bf is not that much.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
6 Jul 10
They're both sweet and caring but I'm more comfortable with the other guy. They're so different in so many ways. I never knew that this can happen to me. I haven't even imagine that there's this kind of feeling.
• Portugal
9 Jul 10
marie well maybe you should see in your heart who is more important to you. the guy you definetely dont want to lose. this situation cant be like during much longer you know :(
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
9 Jul 10
I find both of them important but I think I'm not really that ready to lose my boyfriend. He wants to court me so I said yes.
@347eat (113)
• Philippines
3 Jul 10
Its normal for humans that to have crush with someone even if you have BF/GF due to that you admire him and those things should not taken seriously because it's bad for you to fall in love when you're still on relationship.
@simonelee (2718)
• China
3 Jul 10
I am guilty of this! i recently experienced this and it put me in a situation where my girlfriend have to take an actions so that i would learn from my mistakes! Temptations are everywhere... all you have to do is listen and think deeply to know what you really want. And i realize i love my girl morethan anything else. Now, she's putting a boundary between us and i don't know until when it will be fix. We still communicate but there's a wall between us. I want her back... and i love her.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
Oh my God! I hate this feeling. I know that I love my boyfriend and I'm convincing myself that I just felt an admiration for the other guy but why am I so confused?
• Philippines
3 Jul 10
I strongly believe that having a crush is normal. I think you get to have a crush to someone for their specific attitude, say you admire them playing a certain kind of instruments, you admire the way they write, they are good on certain sports whatever. Sometimes crush can also lead to falling in love. Since you have a boyfriend, do not nurture the feeling. Just enjoy it and it will all just pass you by.
@simonelee (2718)
• China
3 Jul 10
I Think you're right. Don't nurture the feeling, just enjoy. Once i was hooked on this situation. I have a girlfriend and we've been together for almost six years and recently i met a girl online. First, i only admire her for having a beautiful face and having a sexy body.(since my girl is busy my attention was diverted to her. I also see some of the characteristics of my girlfriend on her) But, latter on i even liked her that much. Huh! And i confessed it to my girl and she was in deep pain. We are still together, accepted me but things are not like before. I know it's not the right time to forgive me, but I'm still hoping that she'll forgive me and start all over again. I am so stupid to allow my emotions to go that far...
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
Thanks much my_january. I always think that it's practically normal but the more I do it, seems like I'm having a real good time with the other guy. He's so talented in so many ways and I love his company. I don't want to continue this anymore but the guy's my classmate and we're seeing each other six times a week. simonelee, thanks for sharing your experience. I don't want to end like you and girlfriend do. I hope things would still work for the both of you.
@andy77e (5165)
• United States
4 Jul 10
It means that your feelings are in control of you, instead of you in control of your feelings. That's a bad plan. I would suggest you find ways to control your feelings. Just think how your 'crush' would play out? How would you feel if your boy friend had a 'crush' on someone else?
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
It's okay for me if he has a crush but he doesn't think the way I think. He's very strict when it comes to this matter.
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
yes, having crush even you have a boyfriend is really weird.. because thinking that you have your all then your still not contented with him.. maybe your just a flirt, hihihi im kidding.. its normal ,i supprt you with that, but dont forget your bf okay?
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
Okay... I'll try my best not to forget him. Maybe I'll just stay away from the other guy.
• Philippines
3 Jul 10
Yes, it's normal to have a crush. It doesn't mean that if you arae attracted physically to somebody is you love your boyfriend less. Just dont let your boyfriend know that you have a crush.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
LOL... That's funny. I'm sure that he'll bad if I tell him the truth.
• United States
3 Jul 10
I think it is wonderful to have a crush. The feelings are so sweet and pure. I find nothing wrong with it at all. I am crushing on my man everyday.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
It's a good thing that you're having a crush with your boyfriend but in my case, I'm having a crush with another guy.
• Brazil
3 Jul 10
I personally don't think a person can fell passion for two people at once, maybe that's a feeling confuse or, by seeing another side, maybe you aren't sure what you fell for your boyfriend.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jul 10
Is it possible that I am just denying the fact that I'm not really into him?