Are you satisfied with your partner's love and attention?

seeking for love and affection - looking for someone's attention...
@simonelee (2715)
China
July 7, 2010 1:12am CST
Attention and love are one of the most important thing in a relationship. Now, are you satisfied or unsatisfied of the affection and attention given to you? I'm asking this because i, myself, sometimes feel lack of attention from my partner and i feel less love. Am i being obsessed that's why i want my partner's full attention? Or maybe I'm doing less that's why i am more focused on this issue, if there's really an issue. What about you guys, your experience towards this situation? Have you ever felt the same way? Or am i alone in this kind of emotion. Love to hear your side. Thanks!
3 people like this
16 responses
@ckyera (17332)
• Philippines
7 Jul 10
hi simone, to be honest, hmmm i am satisfied and happy with the love he's showing towards me but there are times that i also feel left out... because he's usually busy with his work and i just can't complain for i know how important it is more than anything else, what he have is more than a work its a duty and even before i already know that that will always be the first priority. anyway, no more issue about that since we already discuss it way back. its just sometimes i'm kinda "KSP" so i demand. lol! you are definitely not alone my dear friend, i guess most of us feel the same thing at one point or another. cheer up.
@ckyera (17332)
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
hi simone, im sad that things like this is happening in your relationship, but sometimes we just need to widen our understanding in our partner's situation and just don't be too demanding. sometimes its also irritating on their part when we demand too much. hehe if we just learn to accept them and be satisfied, i think it will be a lot better and we will feel happier, unless they are really taking us for granted, its another story. haha, its one of what you mentioned! haha and you will be surprised to know which one! actually i'm not scared of it, its just that there are some kind of pressure with me, coz some people do have some expectations from me providing the status that my husband have. haha i have to act accordingly. lol!
@simonelee (2715)
• China
11 Jul 10
Oh my! my mind our preoccupied with negative stuff. I admit that often i am selfish, all i care about this and that and "what if". I'm too focused on those stuff that are impossible to have within a short time. So impatient! Our situation put me into this kind of thinking. It really changed me a lot. you said taking for granted? Hmmm... i took her for granted, i think. and i was tempted to do something that swill destroy are relationship. Anyway, is he a politician?? a brg. captain, city counselor, mayor,? So your a first lady.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
10 Jul 10
Hello, Ck. I thought i was just over acting in this situation. Actually i can't blame my partner for giving me less time and "love" because i was the who pushes her away(consciously and unconsciously) that is why we are in this situation right now. And now here i am demanding her to give all her attention and love. Anyway, is your husband a public servant? He's a police officer? Politician? A priest? Kidding. Aren't you scared of her duty? Being committed to people that are often don't care about them?
@hanagi (390)
• Philippines
7 Jul 10
I am feeling the same. I felt that he doesn't love me and doesn't care for me any more. I felt that he was just there but doing nothing and not giving me that attention he gave a year ago. I felt that I have no partner and that he doesn't exist. He is not giving a break up but he does not make me feel loved by him too. I am confused. I love him yet I don't know if he love me too. All I do is hope and wait for him.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
7 Jul 10
This is exactly how i feel even she 's telling me that she loves me and constantly thinking of me. I don't really feel that love and attention she given me before. I want the attention she gave me years ago when we are both busy with our life. Now, I'm unsatisfied and begging for her. Now, i am so confuse with my feelings. I know she loves me and so do i but it confuses me more each day. I want her badly.
• China
7 Jul 10
so sad!i have not find my lover
@simonelee (2715)
• China
13 Jul 10
Finding is not a good solution. Trust me I've been their. It will only confuses you more and you'll end up unhappy. Maybe you'll also need a little spice to revive the slowly dying relationship. In my case i guess this happening to me and i don't want to let go of her because i love her.
@arunmails (3011)
• India
7 Jul 10
I have a lover... and I am very much satisfied with our relationship and I am very much happy about the love that she had on me. But, sometimes she don't believe me when I talk with other girls.. she will fight with me.. but, I like that type of fight.. coz.. out of over love only she fights with me right.....??
@simonelee (2715)
• China
10 Jul 10
Hello, Arun. Girls are like that. We hate to see our partner talking to someone else especially if we sense that person is flirting intentionally or unintentionally. We may over acting but our senses our strong. We can feel it. Getting jealous is a natural reaction to couples but overly jealous is too much. Hi, Aira! I think i'm using my head instead of my heart that is why we are now detach. It started when my entire personality changed and everything follows... She's different now. I'm having a hard time to bring back the way we are before. I know i should be the one to initiate the changes for us to be happy but i must fix my self first to have a healthy relationship. Oh, God! I know it will be hard but i hope i can understand my self fully and know what i really want in life. Thanks for your responses guys!
@airakumar (1553)
• India
9 Jul 10
Absolutely Arun, She loves you a lot that's why it is indigestible for her to see you are talking to someone. She has a concern for you and loves you very much. Lucky are those who has such a lover. If you also speak and act from the heart, it connects you to their heart and regardless of what you say or do they feel the presence of your connection because if you are 'in your head' then they can feel separated from you, as being in the head is detached, or what's called 'being in the egoic mind'.
• South Korea
7 Jul 10
yeAh SOMETIMES i really feel that... but i dont wanna make it a big issue and stay negative.... I dont wanna stress myself..lol when i feel like his ignoring... im doing something for him to recognize me...lol like wearing sexy lingerie... perfum candlelights... change the style of my hair...and everthing and sometimes when its not enough for him to notice me... I go straight to the point I will tell him like... hunny i feel lonely becuase of you...or hunny i miss making love with u..lol and thats it finish... he will say sorry... and start to be sweet again... and if he acts the same again i do the same thing again..lol hope this one help:)
@simonelee (2715)
• China
7 Jul 10
haha! Nice move. I wish i could do that and test her if she still attracted to me. My partner is a hundred miles away from me so there's no way i can do that nor seduce her in any way. Well, it's really a pain in the a... thinking on how to catches their attention and give more time to us. I'm desperately need her time and love. Thanks for your naughty advice. Maybe i can do that someday. I'll let you know if am success.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
7 Jul 10
"successful" rather
@vikas_711 (106)
• India
8 Jul 10
Hard luck. I m lucky. My parents love me and support me in anyways. Moreover my partner loves me alot and me too. Feeling bad for you. Wish you Good Luck
@simonelee (2715)
• China
13 Jul 10
I really need many lucks to survive this relationship. I love her so much and she loves me even more. I know her reasons but the issue was never been resolve. I was not contented of what we have right now. I need her and i want her badly. I miss the way we where before. Changes started at me but she should also do something.
• United Arab Emirates
7 Jul 10
I am satisfied with the love but not the attention. I feel that she must also be feeling the same. I love my wife lots, she is expectiong love, attention, money etc. If i give her love and attention,...she complains about money. If i concentrate on money she wants love and attention. I have been going through a bad time now...i just wonder what she is going through now that i am far from her. I miss her lots. But she has been giving me less attention...there has been a communication gap. She is not responding to my talks also. I am going crazy.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
13 Jul 10
balance is what we all need. Why don't you plan a vacation for two? To spend time together, have a talk about the issues, gaps and a time to for sweetness just like you where before when you where just in a courtship stage or honeymoon stage. I am telling you this because you where together. In my case we are miles away.. SMS and phone calls connect us.
@jennyze (7029)
• Indonesia
7 Jul 10
Don't give up hope Edward.
@dodo19 (47034)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
7 Jul 10
I am very happy with my husband's attention and love for me. I really don't think that I could ask for more. He's a really amazing husband. He's always there for me. I could ask for a better husband.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
10 Jul 10
and i can feel that you are very much happy and contented of what you have right now. I think you're smiling when you typed this. You are Deeply in love with your hubby! God bless on your relationship and keep that love grow. Thanks for your time dodo. by the way do you like dodo?
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
7 Jul 10
I would not say that you are obsessed or asking too much because if you feel you need more love and attention it must be valid because your feelings can’t be wrong! I’ve been married for fourteen years and we did have a patch when our relationship was a bit rocky. We had outside dramas going on which did not help and the attention was lacking from both directions. I was focusing on that lack for some time until I decided to change my ways and allow my partner to be who he is and amazingly enough he made changes all of his own! We still put our relationship on the back burner sometimes because of other life pressures but all in all we are doing okay and we are on the same page at least! I would suggest focusing on yourself and perhaps it may be worth having a chat with your partner about how you feel, chances are he probably has no idea! I would do that and find some new interests to make life more fulfilling.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
13 Jul 10
She pointed out what are the causes of these issues and it started in me... and everything changed including her. Yes, you're right that i need to focus on my self and know what i really want in life. I have lots of self issues to solve as what my partner told me(I'm not aware of it). Finding the answers was never a big help for me. It only worsen the situation. I guess i need to be contented, enjoy what i have right now and maybe I'll find peace and love. How i wish how easy it would be... Thanks for your advice, Paula.
@ifa225 (14364)
• Indonesia
7 Jul 10
we could never get enough of love. only by giving more attention we will feel satisfied. i stop hoping when i feel like i don't have that much from my partner, but then i start to think why not me who give him all the attention.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
13 Jul 10
I'm tired of it... I'm tired of waiting, begging and hoping for it. I don't want to send her lots of SMS because it may annoy her or whatsoever. Honestly, I'm afraid of rejection. It is so painful to be in this situation especially when you're a plane ride away. You do nothing and can't do anything. I feel less loved and i give her less love unconsciously. Things confuses me. I love her so much but I'm tired of our situation.
@chesaid (104)
• Philippines
7 Jul 10
its but natural for us to demand attention and love from our partner. i also experience this drama just a few days with my partner. you know what i did, i talked to him straight, if he doesn't like to give me time maybe i will look for it in other person. fortunately he listened to my demands. now he make sure that he spend time with me....
@simonelee (2715)
• China
10 Jul 10
Hello, Ches! I already talked to my girl but things didn't work. She has a valid reason and I'm very much aware of her activities but often i don't understand why things happening this way. She already pointed out the reasons and it started with me. I must change also in able us to be together. In your case you talked to your boyfriend and told him if he still continue in giving you less time you'll do an action that he won't like, and he listen. In my case being desperate of having her time and love my attention diverted to someone and i almost fell in love(no physical contact. Exchange messages only). I confessed everything to my girl and she's deeply in pain. Though we are still together but i have lot of things to fix.
@angelajoy (1825)
• Philippines
8 Jul 10
I'm in the same boat right now. I don't understand what happened. Only a year ago he was giving me lots of attention, but now I feel like I have to beg to get it. Well, I'm tired of begging so I'm not doing it anymore. But don't get me wrong. I still love him as I did before, but I just can't help feeling that something's wrong. I've told him about this and he said that nothing's wrong. I'm confused.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
13 Jul 10
Maybe you changed unconsciously that is why he's like that right now? Just like you i beg for it and nothing happened. My partner told me that things was change when i started to change. If i want to bring back those moment that we're both happy i should be more positive as before. Maybe she'll give me what i want. I thought it would be okay for me to have a long distance relationship.
• India
7 Jul 10
yes I always feel like this....but, earlier I used to quarrel with him. Nowadays, my mind is matured enough to handle the situations. Be positive. Everything will be alright. Even our partners will be busy in day to day life.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
13 Jul 10
she given me lots of chances and now i know it would be my last. Now, I'm trying to be more mature and stop complaining because i know she's tired of explaining it again and again. She doesn't want me to cry. So, now I'm trying to hold back my tears and if not i cry when she's not around. It's an emotional torture but i have to be more positive. I have to find peace in my heart.
@jennyze (7029)
• Indonesia
7 Jul 10
I don't have a partner now, so I can't compare notes with you. Sorry...
@simonelee (2715)
• China
13 Jul 10
It's okay. Just come back if you already have a partner and you're experiencing it. And that time you can relate to us and give us some good advice.For now just enjoy your life as a single. Being single is good but having a partner is better.
@LeoWyatt (169)
• Bulgaria
7 Jul 10
Yes, I am completely satisfied. They take a good care of me and I have everything I want and I think they raise me well and I have no complains about that.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
11 Jul 10
Wow! you must be very satisfied of what your partner's attention and love. only few men are like that. I salute you for being like that. I hope your relationship go strong. Keep up the good thing and your love will grow. Thanks for dropping by, Leo.
@JOIEMARVIC (2335)
• Philippines
7 Jul 10
Well sometimes I am not satisfied with the attention and care my partner gives me. I can't help but compare it with my housemate. My housemate is head over heels with his girlfriend. He showers her with love and affection and all things he could possibly give her. And the attention and the way he look at her is so dedicated. I have no feelings towards my housemate, and my boyfriend has his high points in our relationship, but sometimes I just can't help but feel that he , my boyfriend is capable of giving me much more.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
10 Jul 10
well, yes. I am sometimes like that, comparing our relationship to the people i know and get envy. I think we should also do something that will catch their attention? something nice and sweet. I know it's not good to ask something in return but i deserve more. This situation changes us, really changed us. If thing continue, i don't know where we gonna end up.
• China
7 Jul 10
I am luck in this way . we are satisfied with each other . I and my partner understand each other , when something is wrong between us . Therefore I have a happy relationships . We will look after each other forever .