You don't know me . . . you don't know me . . . !

@much2say (34471)
United States
July 7, 2010 10:43am CST
Just like they say on talk shows . . . when the person being judged is trying to defend themselves on the stage while the audience hounds them. "You don't know me . . . you don't know me!" And in a sense they're right. The audience doesn't know the entire picture . . . they can only judge and make huge assumptions from what they were told of the particular situation. But maybe they shouldn't judge and make huge assumptions. That's sometimes what I feel like saying when I'm discussing "my" issues on myLot. I "mostly" don't take things personally, but you know, I can get urked by a responder who has it wrong, tells me to stop being something I'm not, or thinks they are correctly putting themselves in my or my list of characters' shoes. How do you feel when you read something that is worded to make you feel , or at least it's worded that way to you? I know, I know . . . take it for what it is and move on. I do. But still.
4 responses
@dpk262006 (53689)
• Delhi, India
8 Jul 10
You are right much2say, others should not comment on our personality, till they know about us very well. However, some of the members are in the habit of giving unsolicited advice and they do it often. Mylot is a free platform and different kind of members express their varied opinions (I mean, we cannot stop them).
@much2say (34471)
• United States
8 Jul 10
Hi dpk! Yep, on forums such as myLot, people are going to say what they're going to say - whether we like what they say or not. I just hate it when someone tells me to stop being a certain way, when I am not like that at all. And then I feel like I have to defend myself - which then goes off in a tangent from the discussion. Argh!! Hope you are doing well!
@dpk262006 (53689)
• Delhi, India
9 Jul 10
You may ignore those, who come uninvited and offer unsolicited suggestions.
@much2say (34471)
• United States
9 Jul 10
That is true. But I guess when I read their suggestions, the "damage" is already done and it's stuck in my head. Best to ignore them as you said, but hard to do at times.
@dawnald (84126)
• Shingle Springs, California
7 Jul 10
irked and then I either clarify or ignore... I do try and keep in mind that the person can't know the whole situation, and that they're just going on what they do know. Assuming they read and understood the discussion,that is.
@much2say (34471)
• United States
7 Jul 10
Yah, it's just hard to clarify sometimes. I hate having to "justify" and "straighten things out" sometimes . . . it just seems like I'm trying to make excuses or something, when I'm not. Bleh.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84126)
• Shingle Springs, California
7 Jul 10
Me too plus I hate repeating myself if the person didn't get it the first time.
@dorannmwin (36651)
• United States
10 Jul 10
Whenever I've noticed that there are people that are making some kind of an assumption about me, I will typically try to clarify the situation, but then I am also able to move on. There is most definitely no one that is on mylot that knows everything about me and everything about my own situations. And, I guess because of that it is natural to make all kinds of assumptions about people. However, it does irk me whenever people incorrectly assume a negative character trait about me.
@much2say (34471)
• United States
10 Jul 10
I try to clarify too, but sometimes I think the person doesn't come back to the discussion - and it makes me wonder if they even read my clarification. In most cases, I am able to move on, but sometimes I just get mad about certain comments. I guess that's the way it goes with some of these discussions!
• Ethiopia
8 Jul 10
I think this is a a difficult situation,like every body is not understanding you but you are innocent,if i were you i will try to make them as much as possible,time will clear out every thing.
@much2say (34471)
• United States
8 Jul 10
Well, I think in real life time clears out everything. But with online forums such as these, it's like life in a box. I guess people can only "judge" from the evidence that is put before them. What can I say.