Tears won't Stop Falling and I'm Missing Her...

Philippines
July 8, 2010 11:47pm CST
This is not a good day. As a matter of fact, this is the day I dread so much to come but it's here now... My baby left with her father just a minute ago to go to the province and see her relatives. She'll be back until the 14th of July. This is the first time we will be separated. Even when I was at the hospital, I hid her in my room so we will be together... I was able to hide my tears while we were saying goodbyes but the moment I closed the door, I just couldn't take it anymore.I burst into tears... What am I to do? I just feel so sad... and I'm missing her so badly already... I came here to seek comfort and to somehow lessen the pain I'm feeling right now...May God help me get through this...
15 responses
@vandana7 (69050)
• India
9 Jul 10
Hi eurekafemme, I am not a mother so I cant view it from your perspective. But I could give you a child's perspective. I was in boarding schools, and hostels for the better part of my life. So everytime I was leaving for hostel my heart would be heavy. I wouldnt be crying on the road of course, I would wish somehow some miracle would happen to let me be back at home, even though my father was too strict and I took a lot of beating from him. But somehow, it never happened. :) So I can just tell you that your child misses you as much as you do. And though she would be ok without you, I mean she doesnt need you to change her diapers, and bathe her I presume, she would be able to eat some, drink some, make some small talk, all the while wondering when it would be July 14. :) She is more uncomfortable than you are because she has to act love and affections non-stop! That is what we call being social. :) Feel comforted that she is thinking as much of you, if not more. July 14 is not very far now, is it? :) Comparing to six months semesters that I tolerated? :)
• Philippines
9 Jul 10
Oh, dear... I had stopped crying but your response sent new tears to fall... She's just three years old and though she can do all that without me (I'm not worried about it)still, I'm not sure how she will survive the night without me... Thing is, she has no idea that she won't be seeing me for the next 6 days...And, I know how it will stress her out... Yes, it isn't that far, Vandana, and I will try so hard not to miss her that much... Maybe, I am feeling this loneliness because I was left alone with her sister and that she'll be having a grand time in the province. Might like it there so much that she'd stay longer... I feel insecure especially that her father and I had issues between us...
@dpk262006 (56599)
• Delhi, India
9 Jul 10
Vandana- Very well said.
@vandana7 (69050)
• India
9 Jul 10
Eurekafemme - children dont understand "grand". :) If they did, they wouldnt play in mud. :) Chocolates and sweets yes. But a child that young remembers you more by your scent! You see, you are tall and so she cant constantly see your face while she is holding hand. So her way of identifying you is your scent. She'll miss you and would be crying for that as that scent is what makes her feel secure. :) So rest assured she will return. :) @deepak - thanks. :)
@lelin1123 (15643)
• Puerto Rico
9 Jul 10
I'm so sorry that you are in such pain. To get through the next 5 days you need to keep busy. Do things that make you happy and play music that is upbeat. Try and accomplish a project that you have been putting off and or can't get done because you are taking care of your daughter. The time will fly by and before you know it your husband and daughter will be back. Good luck and God Bless!
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
Hello, Lelin.:-) Isurvived the first night without her. 5 days more to go... Right now, i'm keeping myself busy here with the keyboard. Once I get tired typing and thinking, I'll be doing the project I had foregone for so long because my dear daughter is always messing around.:-)I'll grab the chance now while she's not here to mess around.:-) Thank for the thought of consoling my burdened heart. It is a great help. :-)Always have a great day.:-)
@lelin1123 (15643)
• Puerto Rico
10 Jul 10
You are so welcomed. You will make it through this and you can also think about how happy you will be when you see her in five days. It will be a joyous moment when she comes through that door. Take care!
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
I am counting the days, Lelin....Three more days to go... take care, as well,dear.:-)
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
22 Jul 10
I know that it is difficult to be away from your children. I remember the first time that I was away from my daughter for more than a few hours and it was really tough on me at first, though in the end I did enjoy the time away from her. Now, with my son it has been a very different experience because he is almost four years old and he has only been away from me twice overnight and never for more than one night at a time. I couldn't imagine him to be gone for a period of time because I am so attached to him.
• Philippines
23 Jul 10
Yes, Dorannmwin, it is a difficult experience for mothers like us to be away from our children. We just take comforts from the fact that they'll be back to us.Besides, this is an inevitable circumstance.One day, we will learn to really let go of them, not just for a couple of nights, but could be years, for them to discover the world and learn to live on their own. By the way, she's back and being away from her for days made us closer even more.I'm doing every single day spent with her memorable. I learned to cherish my daughter more and this is an affirmation of how much I truly love her. She, in return becomes sweeter. Always hugging and kissing me.:-)
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
That's not too bad. At least your baby is with her father. And she'll be back. Just look at her pictures if you feel lonely. That's what I do. I was there when my wife gave birth to our 3rd child in the province. I was not there with our first 2 kids because I was still studying. I heard the baby's cry. It's amazing. Because it's the first time I felt like a father! But then I have to get back to work after my leave of seven days. But in those 7 days I held her every chance I get. I prepared her milk. I helped my wife bathe her. I changed her diapers. I wake up when she cries. It's hard to part with her. My wife or I call each other once in awhile and hearing our baby's voice makes me happy again. It's like I never left.
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
Oh, God! You are such a wonderful father! God bless all fathers like you.:-) My husband loves her so much and I'm confident he will be taking care of her well. Last night, they called me up (daughter and husband) . For the first times since she left I heard her voice. She said she wanted to be with me and that she loves me more....I almost choked upon hearing her voice and those words... She's so far and yet so near...:-) Thank you, Masmelgar for trying to console me. It is greatly appreciated. By the way, welcome to Mylot.:-)
@sunnycool (12736)
• India
10 Jul 10
I do not have any idea as how would it be to be away from your child---hope she comes back soon and you enjoy your every second being with her .it would be like hell to miss someone you love the most though.I'm sure there are some mylotters who can console you and make you feel better.great day.
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
Hello, dear.:-) Reading your response and the other responses here make me feel better, indeed. You may have no idea how painful it is to be far from your child because you are not a parent yet. But I tell you, it is beyond compare. The only consolation I have right now is that in 5 days time I'll be holding her again.And as always, I can show her how much I love her without cease and there's no distance between us to daunt that. Thank you, Sunnycool. I hope you will have a great day as well.:-)
@smiley83 (1535)
• Malaysia
10 Jul 10
yeah it is so difficult to get through especially when you are deeply attached to her..but, I do hope these 2 days pass fast to get her back again into ur arms
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
A night had passed without her lying beside me. It was a nightmarish kind of a night but i was able to survive it. It ' going to be a 5 day wait until the 14th of July, Smiley. And, I'm keeping myself busy not to always look at the clock and hope another day ends... Thank you for the thoughts and have a beautiful weekend, dear.:-)
• Spain
9 Jul 10
is only for a couple of days hold on trust me i know how it feels having someone you love far away
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
I am holding on and will be waiting for her to come home to me soon, Leonardog.;-) I just couldn't help missing her a lot. And it feels so strange how I can miss someone as much as this... I never knew I feel this much attachment to her... Thank you for bearing with me. Have a wonderful weekend.:-)
@dsrp82 (678)
• Brazil
9 Jul 10
She'll be back soon! Can you feel how fast days goes by? In a heart beat she'll be with you again =)
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
Thank you, Dsrp, for trying to console my broken heart. For a mother waiting for her child to return while she's missing her so much, there's no such thing as a heart beat away.It will always like the heart has stopped beating and the world has stopped turning... I appreciate your thoughts, though.;-) God bless you, dear.:-)
@chuck2 (183)
• Philippines
9 Jul 10
You should be strong and try to manage the emotions or feelings inside. Do not give your time of always thinking about your baby, find ways to keep yourself busy in different things to avoid missing your baby to much. Set always in your mind that sometimes we're just only a borrower of things here in this world. Anything can happen or we might lost it for one just blink of an eye. cheers!
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
Hi, Chuck.:-) Borrower, ei. I do realized that that's why I don't wanna be selfish to my kid and also the people who love her aside from me... I don't own her. I owe it to her to let her discover the world and herself for her to be a better person when she grows up.This is the reason why I agreed to let her take the vacation in the province... I am keeping myself busy here with they keyboard. This is the best thing I can do to keep myself and mind occupied. And to let out the burden I feel inside. Thank you for such people like you here who's bearing with me right now...
@neleene (55)
• Philippines
9 Jul 10
it's the bond between mother and a child...the connection of life -the connection of heart...one thing i can say -hush... you have to be fine for your child...
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
Thank you, Neleene.:-) I'm doing the best I could to stay fine and calm. It's just that I am missing her so much... Thank for the comfort.:-)Makes me feel I am not alone after all.:-)
@vhings_88 (294)
• Philippines
9 Jul 10
I feel your pain. I'm also a mother and I know what it feels when you are separated with your child especially when we're not used to leave them. Have faith, I know your daughter will be ok. If you really want to see her, why not use the internet or any gadget to communicate with her. I hope you'll feel better with it.
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
what can be more painful than that being separated from your child? I sometimes wonder why giving birth to a child are both painful beyond compare... I'm not used to not seeing her for more than half a day. And the 6 days of waiting is agonizing for me... she's just 3 years old and she doesn't want to talk using those gadgets. i can only communicate via phone but she's not saying anything... I survived the first night, though. 5 more days ... Thank you , Vhings, for bearing with me...
@dpk262006 (56599)
• Delhi, India
9 Jul 10
Hi! Eureka! I can understand your plight, plight of being a mother of a baby. Parting with one's child is difficult to bear. Hopefully, your baby would have gone with her father for meeting someone/to attend a ceremony. Be brave and patient, the time will pass very quickly and you will never come to know about it, 14th July, 2010 will come in a jiffy. Hopefully, you can get in touch with your hubby through mobile and ask about well being of the baby.
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
Parting with my daughter is very difficult, indeed, Deepak... It is more painful than giving birth to her. I feel like I am crushed to the bone. She'll be gone for only a week to visit her relatives. No ceremony to attend to. Plus, my husband needs a break, too. He wanted me to come along with them but I refused since it is too costly for all 4 of us to travel. Plus, I wanted to give my daughter a little freedom. She has been clinging to me like a jealous child after her baby sister was born. I think she needs a wider outlet for her emotional needs. Her relatives can give her that, too. My hubby called me up once they reached their destination. They were both ok. But, I wasn't able to talk to my baby. She's quite tired and shy to talk to over the phone... Thank you, my dear for making me feel better. I greatly appreciate the thought of it.:-)
@anuramn (240)
• India
9 Jul 10
I can understand your feelings coz I'm a mother of a 4-year old and I can't be without seeing her. I know how much I miss her when she goes out with my relatives. She would say as a small girl, ma, tata, bye bye...but after sometime, she'll call me up and ask how am I.
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
Hello, Anuramn.:-) Your angel is such a sweet one. Aren't we, mothers, lucky and blessed to have children such ours? :-) My daughter said goodbye ans she kept on giving that flying kiss and I love you, Mama while her father cuddled her on their way out of the house...And, right now, remembering that moment, sends fresh tears to fall. I survived the first night without her but it was a nightmarish kind of night. Waking up in the middle of it because I thought I heard her cry... Thank you, Anuramn. God bless you and you child.:-)
• China
9 Jul 10
you will be alright soon,then you can go to see your baby. now what you should do is to enrich your life. you are now in hospital, right? then you can still surf on-line. you can look for your interests on the internet. Don't let your baby hold your whole heart. wishes for you!
• Philippines
9 Jul 10
I know I will be all right soon,Ivy.It is just a matter of six days then I will be with her again.I'm so sad that this six days of wait feels like an eternity for me. Only 44 minutes had passed after she left our house but it seems like ages already... It is never easy to be apart from her. We were always together. We shared situations and moments I'd never shared with anyone else's... Heck... I just want to forget the pain that's why I'm surfing the net like crazy right now. Thank you for uplifting my spirit...
• United Arab Emirates
9 Jul 10
i am so sorry to hear that...i know ot will be ok. i have not gone through this situation, so i really dont know how it feels. But i definately know that its a pain that you are going through...all i can do is only pray for you.
• Philippines
9 Jul 10
Hi.:-) I'm telling you right now that you don't want to be put in this situation. It is as painful as hell... I love my daughter so much and we always sleep together. Sharing stories until she doze off. She left today without a hint that she won't be seeing me for a couple of days. And I wonder how she'll cope with it later tonight. I'm praying it will be less difficult for her than it is to me right now... Thank you, Edwardjoy, for bearing with me and trying to lessen the pain. I appreciate it so much...