Live organ donation...

United States
July 10, 2010 10:14am CST
This thought popped into my head awhile back. It was when my mother called me out of the blue after not speaking for at least 5 years. One of the first things I learned about her was that she had end stage renal failure and is on dialysis for the rest of her life. Immediately I assumed that she found me and called me so she could ask me to donate a kidney to her. She didn't ask (she's not capable of getting a transplant at this time), but still the thought remained in my head for sometime. I thought about what I would do if and when she did ask. I decided that I would say no. First of all her kidneys are not her only health issue, so medically it would be stupid (which is why she's not capable of getting a transplant). Second, she and I had a bad relationship most of my life. All I kept thinking about was what if sometime down the road someone more important to me needs one of my kidneys. Heaven forbid one of my kids get sick and needs a kidney.. but I can't give them one because I'd already donated one to my mother. There's no one in this world more important to me than my kids and my husband. If one of them needs an organ from me I wouldn't think twice about it, but unless something like that happens, I think I'll keep my organs myself for now.. just in case. Under what circumstances would you donate an organ?
3 people like this
11 responses
@Opal26 (17690)
• United States
12 Jul 10
Hey kats~ I know about your issues with your mother and I don't blame you for not wanting to donate a kidney to her even if she was able to benefit from it! Giving someone a kidney is a very big deal! It means that God Forbid something happens to your kidney one day, you could end up needing a one yourself! Usually in "live donors" it is a sibling or child who is the donor. The person donating in a family situation usually has a strong bond to the person and special reason to give up a kidney for them! My Rehab Counselor needed a kidney and one of her brothers gave her one of his because he was the best match and both her kidneys were failing. It saved her life!
1 person likes this
@geonelynn (369)
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
i would give my kidney to my mother no matter how hard our relationship had been.. after all she is still my mother, the reason why i am on this earth.. if my mother really needs it then i wouldn't have second thoughts knowing that i can do something about it. if she were mean to me in the past then this is no reason for me to held back the one thing that can sustain her and make her live for a longer time. maybe through this we can patch our relationship and make up for the lost time and maybe this is God's plan for us to forgive each other. if this would happen to me when i grow old, then i would feel terrible if one of my children would only care less about me.. i would really feel sad. if my kids or husband would need a kidney and i won't be able to donate because i've donated it to my mother, then i know that God provides. God will make a way. and i know we are in God's hands...nothing can ever go wrong. :)
@AmbiePam (50160)
• United States
10 Jul 10
Well, the kidney is the only organ I have that is worthwhile for a live donation. I know that people often donate a part of their liver. For a while they thought my sister might have to donate part of her liver to me, but she didn't have to. And a good thing too. I would have been 80 years old with one piece of cake left, and my 82 year old sister would say, "Remember when I gave you part of my liver? I did, so I get the last piece of cake!" And when I said they thought, they is my doctors and my family. I told them all I wouldn't need a liver trasnplant, and I was right. I'll take my victories wherever I can get them. I wouldn't hesitate to give a kidney to my sister, parents, brother-in-law (I love my brother-in-law, but if I have him a kidney, it would be for the benefit of my sister), or grandmother (the only grandparent I have left). I would also probably give a kidney to any of my dad's sisters. I love them. They are such awesome people. My dad's side of the family is huge, but my aunts are probably the only ones I'd give an organ. I have cousins, second cousins, and third cousins everywhere I turn. It might sound callous, but I don't think I would give a kidney to one of them, or any of my uncles. I mean, I know people in my church better than I know all of those cousins. Plus, I'm not a well person. If I'm going to give an organ, it better be for a darn good reason!
1 person likes this
@oldchem1 (8144)
10 Jul 10
Well I used to think that I was too old (at almost 60) to be considered for an organ transplant, but I was reading last week that there have been successful organ transplants from donors in their 70s and 80s. I would have no hesitation in donating a kidney if it were to help save the life of one of my children or grandchildren. I am so sorry to hear about your mother's health - I expect that she contacted you as she realises that her time may be short now, I do hope that you have been able to put the past problems behind you
• United States
11 Jul 10
I would probably think that too old also.. though I may feel differently once I reach that age. From my own current stand point I'd think organs should first go to those that would have a long, healthy life after the transplant.. but then, 60 isn't really that old.. at 80 I'd think that's definitely too late.
@lumenmom (1996)
• United States
13 Jul 10
When I did not have any children of my own, I would have considered donating to my mother if she had needed a kidney, mainly because she was my closest relative and she did so much for me during my growing up years. She was actually my maternal grandmother and was disabled by rheumatoid arthritis but she did more with and for me than a lot of parents I know. She has since passed on, but also now I have a daughter so she would be the main person I would consider donating for if the need were there.
• Canada
12 Jul 10
I would only donate to someone I really love, and only if they had no other health issues.
@dsrp82 (678)
• Brazil
11 Jul 10
I'd anything for my mother! But my relationship with her is wonderful, so, I cant compare my case with yours...
@Ladyslipper (1330)
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
I would not hesitate to donate my organ/s to the ff people who i very important to me: 1) My Mother who never failed to believe in me and never gave up on me during my rebel days as a teen. She never blamed for anything even if I was at fault. She never made me feel that I'm a bad person and always made me feel that I'm the most nice and kind person in tis world. 2) My father who is very responsible and did everything he could to make sure that all three of us finish our studies and degree in College on his own without the need for his children to work while studying. 3) My husband who is very loving and sweet and responsible like my father. 4) My two sons. 5) My brother and sister. We have a good relationship and have always been there for me when I needed them most.
@GardenGerty (102613)
• United States
11 Jul 10
I would donate if it really meant an improved quality of life for the recipient. It would be husband, child, brother as recipients. My sister does not take care of herself, and it would be foolish to donate to her.
@lilybug (21148)
• United States
10 Jul 10
If my mom, my sister, or one of my kids needed an organ from me that I was able to give then I think I would not even hesitate to give it. Anyone else I would have to think about it. I don't know what would make me feel the need to donate to someone else.
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
10 Jul 10
If it were my mother or father, I would donate the kidney unless the doctors painted a really hopeless prognosis. The thought of somebody else needing the kidney further down the road really would never have occurred to me. But then my relationship with my parents has always been a good one.