What do you do with your kids?

United States
July 11, 2010 7:33pm CST
When your kid is acting up, what do you do to punish them? Do timeouts ever work? What about taking things away. My son is 9 and I feel like everyday I am on the verge of my sanity level with him.
5 responses
@sweetbit (75)
• Philippines
12 Jul 10
Hi aurorastorm! I have two kids,a toddler and a baby. For my 2 year old daughter, it could be tiresome sometimes, especially now that they are testing their autonomy and discovering things on their own, But there are some things that they need not to be doing yet or touching, etc. It irks if you tell them not to to "this" or "that", the more will they act on it. But, reading through topics on kids regarding their behavior, it all is pointing to the caregiver's attention. Your son is nine, I really think that you should be firm with your commands but at the same time constantly talking to them of the wrong thing they did and the consequences it causes. It may seem they do not keep to heart what you say but the key point is to have the patience to never get tired of talking to them. Loosing your grip on all their foolishness is just normal, but i think when this happens you need to cool yourself down first. You could go to other first and calm down yourself then when you are, that is the time you talk to your son. I assure you that if you tell your son not to do this and what will happen if he does that thing in a caring manner, he will understand. I hope this helps, aurorastorm.
• United States
13 Jul 10
sweetbit- Thanks for this response. You are so right, I lose my patience start yelling and I am miserable, he stops listening. Yesterday I feel I finally did something right, by telling him I needed a break from him for one hour. My husband was with him and I stayed upstairs by myself, then we had a nice discussion where I think he really took to heart what I said to him.
@p3ks626 (6550)
• Philippines
12 Jul 10
I dont have kids yet but I have experienced taking care of my nephews and they were really hyperactive. I guess my sister also has to deal with them the same way you do but my nephews find me scary that they always obey what I tell them. I hope when I would have my own kids, they are going to obey me like my nephews did.
• United States
13 Jul 10
p3ks626- funny you should say this. The thing about kids is and you will learn this when you have your own, they always listen to someone else better than their parents. My son would never act up at school at all, his teachers always say how good he is and he is always a good listener.
@spalladino (17926)
• United States
12 Jul 10
Timeouts work on a 9 year old as long as there are strict conditions. For instance, you can't send him to his room and allow him to entertain himself by playing with something so he should have to sit on his bed and think about what he did. My kids hated that part because, afterwards, we would have a talk about it. What they had done wrong, why it was wrong, what they should have done, what they will do in the future..things like that. Sometimes taking a favorite item away for a specific amount of time works, too. The key is to find what works and continue to use that method until it no longer works...but discussing the behavior should always be part of the lesson.
• United States
13 Jul 10
Sometimes I think I forget the most easy simple things about being a mother when I get really aggravated. I have sent him to his timeouts but you are right they are to his room with all the stuff in the world in there for him to do. Yesterday, I wound up telling him I needed to have a one hour break from talking to him, that actually really affected him and then when we talked about what happened, I think he really understood why I was so frustrated with his not listening to me.
@Memnon (2173)
12 Jul 10
Depending on perspective, I am lucky or unlucky enough not to have children. My partner has a son who was 14 when we met, and luckily we have always gotten along fine. Post school he spent a lot of time at a London academy, so I did not experience many of that age group's troubles. I also work nights, so come into contact with few who have children. The few that have them do have an air of 'tearing their hair out' about them. Hopefully some experienced myLotters will be able to come to your aid!
• China
12 Jul 10
I have no kid, but I know that most kids sometimes will make their parents crazy...