Just Stay! Should Someone be Long Suffering in a Relationship if No Abuse??

@artistry (4154)
United States
July 14, 2010 5:18pm CST
Do you think a person, man or woman should stay in a relationship, if it is "good"? No abuse, but a ho hum relationship, either married or unmarried. What would be your perimeters for staying in a "good" relationship. You do love the person. Share your thoughts.
4 responses
@Adoniah (7515)
• United States
14 Jul 10
If your relationship is boring, it is as much your fault as it is your partners. Spice it up a bit yourself. You shlould thank the Lord that you have a good relationship. If you love your Mate then sit down and talk this out and figure out how to make life more fun. I knew a couple that wanted to liven their love life after they had had 4 boys. The kids were big enough for the eldest to babysit the little ones and they were still young themselves. They picked Tues. night for "Date Night". They picked a place for the "Date"...She would dress to the "Nines"...Wait for her husband in the bar til he got off work and he would "Pick her up" with wonderful corny oneliners and they would go off on their date....It kept their marriage young and them too. The kids had a chance to feel more mature because one night a week they were trusted to be alone. Everyone responded well to the experiment. I think it would be terrible to throw away a good relationship because you cannot find a way to spice it up. Shalom~Adoniah
@artistry (4154)
• United States
15 Jul 10
..Hi there Adoniah. What an excellent story, this should be told around society. So that people will realize that they are reponsible for making their own happiness and keeping their relationships going in the right direction. Good for the two of them. Oft times we sit and wait for external things to make us happy. It's inside us and if we connect with our partners, I do feel that things can get better and situations can be worked out. It is certainly worth a try. Thanks so much for sharing with us. Take good care.
@Adoniah (7515)
• United States
20 Jul 10
I assume by your return comment that it was not your relationship that was in trouble. This is good. Shalom~Adoniah
1 person likes this
@artistry (4154)
• United States
20 Jul 10
...Hi there again Adoniah, No this is not a subject about my own relationship. Thank you.
• Philippines
15 Jul 10
A disappointing relationship? :) hmm... I think there should be open communication to have a good relationship. Both also must do their task and must not count what he or she has done. Give and take - there that's the word. To make the relationship spicier, I think both should give effort of showing affection.:D
1 person likes this
@artistry (4154)
• United States
15 Jul 10
..Hi there mac_mac, Welcome to the ranch, it's a nice place to meet new and good friends. That word commuication is one of the most important words in terms of relationships. Not talking at one another, but communicating and understanding one another. Both do have to talk about their individual needs, how would one know that the other is dissatisfied if they are not told about it? My paternal grandfather once told my mother, not to hold things inside as you will burst. Talk it out, resolve it and sleep well. Spice? It takes two and affection is definitely a key ingredient. Thanks for an interesting response. Take care.
@veejay19 (3592)
• India
15 Jul 10
Hope you are doing well..lm. A relationship works well when there is give and take from both sides and not when it is a one sided affair.Usually the love factor for a married couple gradually reduces as time passes and is converted into a pleasant companionship which can last the entire gamut of their lives. If it is a one sided affair where one partner loves the other only to receive indifference from the other then it is better to quit rather than face a situation where out of indifferece the partner starts having an affair with someone else which will result in suspicion,doubts and frequent quarrels between them.This s where the relationship sours and becomes unbearable.coming to your point, i personally feel that if it is a 'good' relationship even though a ' ho-hum' affair one should continue ,if the pair are married,if not then one has the chice either to quit or stay. In the present age marriage is losing its once upon a time sacredness resulting in couples divorcing at a rapid rate.One should give a little time for the relationship to grow and prosper and if it doesen`t, then say good bye.
1 person likes this
@artistry (4154)
• United States
15 Jul 10
...Hi there, My friend, nice to hear from you. The content of your response is as always measured and logical. It is true, the longer a relationship goes on the more it tends to wear down, if the two people allow it. I always compare relationships with plants, they need water, air, sunshine, and a little fertilizer. Tender loving care would be my term. If we care about our partner as we care about ourselves, treat them with respect and loyalty, a relationship can last a long, long time. Many have, but it takes some attention. If there is a breakdown as you have stated then it may be time to move along if you have tried to work it out, as life is too short. Thanks so much for your response. Take good, good care.
@lacieice (2065)
• United States
14 Jul 10
Hi artistry They may still care about each other, but is it really love? If it is love, then they need to build on it and find ways to revive it. If it is not love, then it's an empty relationship, and nothing will revive it, There will be no happiness, and isn't thst what life is supposed to be? Happy? Perhaps it is time to move on. Just staying because it's comfortable, albiet boring, is not the way it's supposed to be.
1 person likes this
@artistry (4154)
• United States
15 Jul 10
..Hi there laciece, Your first sentence says it all to me. If at one time two people loved each other it is hard for me to see how, if it was truly love as you say, that love can not be stoked like a dying fire, and restarted to where it once was. If you really loved someone, even if you did not marry that person, there is that little spark that is down there somewhere. So two people together should be able to find that initial spark and build on it as you say to a better place. Thanks so much for your reply.