Are you even a teensy bit envious of families with many, many kids??

@much2say (40552)
United States
July 17, 2010 12:35pm CST
We have 2 kids, and that's seriously enough. But when I watch shows like Jon and Kate, part of me does get envious of big, big families. My husband thinks I'm crazy . . . it's a lot of work to say the least and surely must be expensive. I know, I know . . . and believe me, 2 is definitely enough for us. Maybe the thought of the kids never having to be alone appeals to me . . . that the one day we are gone they would still have each other - and there would be many to take comfort with. Even though you may be content with your family size, does a little part of you ever wish you had many more kids? P.S. Please don't tell me maybe I should have more kids - ha ha - we are definitely done.
2 people like this
12 responses
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
18 Jul 10
er NO..... I know what I'm capable of handling, and 3 is about my limit....
@much2say (40552)
• United States
19 Jul 10
Hee hee! Are ya sure you never had a 4th in mind? My limit is definitely 2. Maybe if I were younger, I'd give a different number . . . but I'm content with 2. The other night, we were walking - baby with daddy, daughter with me, and pushing the empty stroller . . . for a second there I wondered what if there was another one in the stroller . . . I told hubby and he immediately said NO - hee hee.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
19 Jul 10
a fourth, hahaha... Two was my limit too, but I got surprised with twins!
@much2say (40552)
• United States
19 Jul 10
Gotcha - that's right, you had twins!
1 person likes this
@Angelgirl16 (2177)
• United States
18 Jul 10
Hi much2say, To be blunt. No! not even a teensy bit envious of the couples who have a football team of children.. I applaud parents who have more than one child, which is how many I have. I know that I am fortunate to have her because I have a condition where I was not suppose to be able to have any children at all. So you see, in my case I had no choice. I work with children everyday at the elementary level, even some preschoolers who are not yet potty trained. So many of them have issues that need to be addressed with the parents, and when you meet the parent(s) you get a clearer picture about the situation. You're asking yourself, "why did this woman have these children?" Raising children, having a sucessful career, maintain a social life, are all major responsibilities and tasks. If you are not able to fulfil them, the children suffer, physically and mentally. It is wise to know your limit and stick with the choice.
@much2say (40552)
• United States
19 Jul 10
Well said, Angelgirl16. There are many parents who are nuts to have more children than they can handle - of course that Octo mom is an extreme case. It's one thing to want a huge family - it's another thing to be able to support all those kids - financially, physically, mentally, and emotionally. 2 is definitely our limit and we intend to keep it that way . . . though my friend said the same thing and she popped out 2 more on top of that!!
@much2say (40552)
• United States
21 Jul 10
mommakat Glad to hear you are able to handle the football team - hee hee!! Yes, some parents are just not fit to handle multi-kids (let alone one sometimes!) - but you certainly sound qualified to do it! Kudos to parents like you!
• United States
21 Jul 10
Hi, Out of all the jobs I have ever had, being a mom has been the best most rewarding of them all. I love the little hugs and slobby kisses and the little conversations that are sooooo serious. There is nothing like being a mom/mother. I feel sorry for those that are mothers but miss out on the most precious moments of her and her child/children's life. I say, have them if you want to, just love them when they get here. They didn't as to come, you insisted.
@ET28LV (1895)
• Latvia
25 Jul 10
Hi much, I do not have kids, because I am teenager. But, when I grow up I would happy If we have theree kids. Why theree not two? I do not know theree sound better. But, I would happy with kids who have about 2 years difference. On my family we are four my father, mother, brother and I. I think the bad is then If there is only one kid in family. Yes he have more things etc. But, he/she is not happy, because there is second kid to play games together. I like that feeling when I have big brother. I can't imagine that family's whose are big with 5-8 kids parents can change to crazy with all things what need to buy etc. Take care, Have a nice day!
@much2say (40552)
• United States
26 Jul 10
I hope you have your happy three kids family one day!! I come from a family of four too - so somehow having 2 kids is natural - although my husband comes from a family with 3 kids. I don't think it's bad to have one child . . . but I know what you're saying - we wanted 2 so they would always have each other. Yes, it's hard to imagine having many, many kids . . . I think I'd rather keep it to just "imagining" - ha ha.
@pastigger (618)
• United States
21 Jul 10
There are days I would like 2 and other days where the one is going to wear me out. I have never wanted more than 2 and 1 is seeming more likely now. I do know what you are saying it seems nice to have them have so many other kids to play with but I sure wouldn't want to be the one to break up all the fights! I only have 1 sister and that was fine for me. Due to medical reason mostly we will probally have one and two whould probabaly overwhelm me too much! So she is not lonely right now anyway I run a home daycare, that and I have to work and this way I get to stay home. Later I am sure that she will have lots of friends she is just that kind of kid. Watching more kids is fine but I am happy when they go home, I am happy to have only one that I have to bathe and put to bed and buy clothes for. If I had another girl I would be in real trouble, they just make to cute of kids clothes. So enjoy you daydreams and them be happy you only have two that you have to do things for.
@much2say (40552)
• United States
23 Jul 10
Hee hee - yes, we should be happy with what we have!! I don't doubt that it's overwhelming to have multi-kids. My cousin who is a teacher said the same about kids - that she's happy when they all go home (she doesn't have or want any kids, so she goes home to "peace and quiet", as she would say). I know many moms who say one is enough for them as well . . . one even said she and hubby were "traumatized" with the boy they had - ha ha - so another one was definitely not an option. I had just one sister too!!
@maximax8 (28570)
• United Kingdom
21 Jul 10
I have got a baby daughter that is one year old, a disabled three year old son and a teenage son. My oldest is at secondary school and he is a very sensible boy. My middle son isn't able to walk and like gets harder the heavier he gets. My baby is able to crawl and cruise along furniture. Soon I imagine she will be able to walk. I am content with the size of my family but I envy families with lots of children. My sister has the perfect family: two sons and two daughters. I guess that air fares for eight children would be a lot and I am keen on traveling.
@much2say (40552)
• United States
23 Jul 10
My daughter and son are almost 5 years apart - and I deal with 2 different milestone levels. I can't imagine going through any more than that at the same time! I do envy those with many children, but eek - I'm sure it's more work once you are in that position - goodness, oh yah - the expenses for air travel with the entire family - yikes!
• India
19 Jul 10
hi, i love kids a lot and even though i like to have a big family but at the same time i am capable of handling only two children.so that i think i can totally concentrate on them and look after them carefully and even the expenses are also high now a days ,so i believe now "small family happy family".Isn't?
@much2say (40552)
• United States
19 Jul 10
That's pretty much how I see it too! With just 2, I can concentrate on them - and them only . . . you can see how flustered things get for parents like John and Kate - and all their children. I can already see the expenses rising with just 2 kids as they are getting older - I can't even imagine with many more. And definitely I'm happy with my "small" family.
@lunchz (44)
18 Jul 10
i have a daughter right now and i don't know if i can still add another one.. here in the Philippines we really are in a bad economy so having more child is really not necessary.. i think atleast 2 children is enough for 1 family so that the parents can still support the kid's needs and live a content life.
@much2say (40552)
• United States
19 Jul 10
We wanted to have two so they would always have each other. Having kids does add up, but regardless, we wanted to have two - but no more than that. Definitely that is enough for us . . . we can give each child our time and love - and be able to support them - and not spread ourselves thin!
• India
18 Jul 10
hi... iam still a student but as a student and Indian we respect our relation ... i feel happy when all my relatives come together for festival.... but daily with big family i think cannot be tolerated ...
@much2say (40552)
• United States
19 Jul 10
My cousin is an elementary school teacher - and she always said she loved kids, but only at work. She likes coming home to "no" kids. She said work is just a few hours, but she'd hate to deal with kids all around the clock. She and her husband opted to not have any children at all!
@Memnon (2173)
17 Jul 10
Not at all. I came from a rather disjointed and now very split family. Christmas was always a time of stress and argument or one upmanship, so I don't miss it at all. I suppose that couples like us balance out those who are, erm, more productive.
@much2say (40552)
• United States
19 Jul 10
Sorry to hear that - but I can understand. I have friends who feel exactly the way you do - especially around the holidays or when the family gets together period. That sounds very much like my mom's side of the family - and it's a fairly big family as well - my mom tries to stay away from them all. Yep, there can be downsides to having too "productive" of a family.
@doormouse (4619)
17 Jul 10
i have 3 children,i would have loads but i hate being pregnant,if i liked being pregnant then i'd have about 6,but after my last pregnancy i had my tubes cut,because i really couldn't have any more pregnancies,i was in pain with the last and i can't stand it when they move inside you and all the weight i put on is just terrible
@much2say (40552)
• United States
19 Jul 10
For me, although it didn't seem like it at the time, pregnancy seemed easier than when the kids popped out - hee hee!! It was easier to keep them in control when they were in my tummy - ha ha. Though I wasn't in pain, I had gestational diabetes with the second one . . . the strict diet and the stuff I had to go through didn't make me "enjoy" the pregnancy as much as I would've liked to.
@cream97 (29166)
• United States
17 Jul 10
Hi, much2say. Never! Sometimes I wished that I only had one child. I love all three of my kids dearly.. I just wished that I only had one... I look at a parent that has more than one and the only thing that I am saying to myself, how the heck can they do this???
@much2say (40552)
• United States
19 Jul 10
Hi cream97! I remember when we just had one . . . looking back, things were actually much easier (when at the time it didn't seem like it - ha ha). But I do also remembering that I wanted a second one when I only had one . . . a playmate for my only one. I think it's neat when there are many siblings and they can all play with each other, but as you know, having kids isn't all about play . . . so having many might wear me out - hee hee!
@Bellapop (1281)
17 Jul 10
I am becuae I really value having family, especially a big family. I have a big extended family myself, and although i still have brothers and sisters, I wold love to have lots of children to build a big family :)
@much2say (40552)
• United States
19 Jul 10
Best of luck to you in building that big family! Keep those family values! We started our family much later than most people, there's no way we could have a big family now even if we wanted to. For me, I think the thought of it is sweet, but in reality I'm already zapped of my energy, so 2 is enough - hee hee.