It Is That Time Of Year Again...
July 21, 2010 6:29pm CST
Political sign mating season. Mysteriously, dozens of political vote for me signs have been appearing in random places. Apparently, the favored mating grounds are next to busy roadways and in intersections. Although, no one has recorded the actual mating habits of the political sign, it is theorized by some experts that the signs reproduce similarly to the one-celled organism. This is due to the fact that one sign's appearance marks a future growth explosion. Similarities to the parent sign are obvious, with the same color patterning and strange fonts in their attempt to attract attention by those passing by. While the names on those signs are different, experts again theorize this is due to the random lettering that is found in the political sign's DNA. No scientist has yet to actually acquire a DNA sample due to a strange paralyzing fear that they will be compelled to actually vote for someone on that sign. No known treatment for this fear exists. Some say it subsides after the vote is cast but no one really knows if this is the case or not. Advice from the experts is to completely ignore the political signs until mating season has ended. Other advice from experts include don't go near the signs, don't post in yards (due to their mating habits), and patiently wait out the mating season. It is predicted to end in December, although a few left-over signs make stick around for awhile. (This is predicted to occur more often in the Southern sunny states.)