too shy to show.....

Philippines
July 25, 2010 2:42am CST
sometimes i ask myself, why am i too shy to show myself publicly PDA (but not to the extreme), how affectionate i am to someone whom i have relationship with? i know being affectionate will help both me and my partner gain a much deeper level of love, however, it might be frightening because i don't want to be judged and being mocked by other people who don't seem to understand how does it feel to have a (same *** relationship), does people have a preference? based on my experienced, if they saw same woman together they don't mind, but if they did see same man together it is a different story, that is why, for me it is better to be alone rather than being scrutinized by this so called cruel, critical minds of some people....this is just my observation, and it doesn't pertain in any way to anybody other than me...
1 person likes this
9 responses
• Philippines
26 Jul 10
hi there! my boyfriend and i used to argue the same thing before. because im not really favor to public display of affection too. i find it uncomfortable. i am afraid that my church mates might see us. because i am a bit of a public icon in our church and a lot of people knew me. aside from that, i handle the church youth. i am always conscious with my every action. i have to be a better example for the youth. but that was at first. my bf and i have talked about it already and we have set a deal. we avoid pda's during church activities. but other than that we do what we naturally should do. but still keeping descent display. what changes my mind? the fact that it is normal. i realize that love should sometimes shown publicly to prove it to others. it puts more affection to our relationship and confidence to both of us. i think you should settle it too. it doesn't harm anyway and believe me it's worth trying the change. just do not go overboard. and still limit yourself. that'll go well for sure. happy mylotting!
• Philippines
26 Jul 10
hi there! my boyfriend and i used to argue the same thing before. because im not really favor to public display of affection too. i find it uncomfortable. i am afraid that my church mates might see us. because i am a bit of a public icon in our church and a lot of people knew me. aside from that, i handle the church youth. i am always conscious with my every action. i have to be a better example for the youth. but that was at first. my bf and i have talked about it already and we have set a deal. we avoid pda's during church activities. but other than that we do what we naturally should do. but still keeping descent display. what changes my mind? the fact that it is normal. i realize that love should sometimes shown publicly to prove it to others. it puts more affection to our relationship and confidence to both of us. i think you should settle it too. it doesn't harm anyway and believe me it's worth trying the change. just do not go overboard. and still limit yourself. that'll go well for sure. happy mylotting!
• Indonesia
26 Jul 10
hi rendhel :) i guess it was not a shyness, but from what i got from your feelings, it was a fear..fear of being judged, or being scrutinized like your words there. i guess it happens to not just gay people, but also lesbian people. there are some people who are still afraid of showing it and stay in the closet, because of various reasons. i might not completely understand how it feels, but for me..the main thing is you really love that person.. unless you mention about the country's tradition of where you live, because sometimes it stopped people from loving a person..same or different gender..
@aaronfyzeon (1920)
• Philippines
26 Jul 10
You should not be shy! if you really love the person or you love each other then there is no reason for you to be shy. it is just in the state of mind that you are being shy because you always think what other people might say. just don't mind them. they are not the ones giving you food to eat so don't be shy! be proud because you know how to love and you are also being loved by that person!
• Philippines
26 Jul 10
Depending on the situation.i'd rather be too shy, when its a PDA thing. but showing that you love someone is not just doing PDA,instead giving the best of you.
• Philippines
25 Jul 10
Your real issue here, my friend, is not PDA per se...it's more a gender issue. Sad to say, it's a social issue rather than a personal one and there's not much we can do about it until people miraculously start being open-minded, LOL. But seriously, as long as you're not doing anything illegal, why should it matter what other people think?
• United Arab Emirates
25 Jul 10
Its called inferiority complex and lack of confidence. I used to feel that everyone is looking at me when i go out in the streets. The day i stoppped thinking this i felt fine. The medicine is in our mind. We need to get it out of our mind and we are the ones who can do it. So do the things thet you are scared of and the fear will get out of you.
@damned_dle (3944)
• Philippines
25 Jul 10
You can't change how people will think of you. But you can change your attitude towards it. So if you can accept it, or you can just ignore them then you wouldn't be shy anymore. I know it's hard but it's either that or... move to another country who accepts it.
• Jamaica
25 Jul 10
Well I can understand what you are saying but honestly you have to live for you and what makes you happy. The same people who are looking at you funny are probably leading the same kind of lifestyle but are still in the closet so to speak.Even when I am out with my husband I can get looks but that because some people are just not into PDA even if it is with a man and women.If you feel shy just start off slowly, holding hands and maybe a kiss in the forehead. Always remember nobody had the right to judge you. Best of Luck :~)