In love with your best friend

Jamaica
August 14, 2010 2:21pm CST
i knew this girl about 3 years now and we are best friends...we tell each that no matter what we are not gonna break up..she has her boyfriend and i have my girlfriend..we spend most of our times together and sometimes our spouses feel left and become jealous and causes problems...my best friend was the cause of my break up with my girl friend...and at the same time i was the cause of her break up with her boyfriend...from that day on she tells everyone that i am her boyfriend and i tell everyone that she is my girlfriend...i really really like her (maybe love) so i decided to make a proposal and she says she aint thinking straight..so i dropped it...a week later i asked her why again and she said she is back into a relationship with this guy who has cheated on her for 3 years and still when we go out together wedo things like boy friends and girlfriend do...help me!!!!!!!!!
9 responses
@Renhard (3471)
• Jamaica
14 Aug 10
That's really hard. I would say to just find someone else. Then maybe you can keep both or make the decision to move on with the first one.
• Jamaica
14 Aug 10
thats true..but suppose i move on and then she wants me back..what do i do?
@Renhard (3471)
• Jamaica
14 Aug 10
Its a reason its called move on. That mean even if she wants you back you would have somebody else. Right?
• Jamaica
15 Aug 10
yeah let her feel the burn!! that i was going through with her!
• Pakistan
15 Aug 10
Well, mine case is also smeller what I do, I try to ignore some time then she remains silent about few days and comes up with angrily that why don't you talk to me my boyfriend done this, and you are not properly talking to me. So at that time I try to me her feel that I'm good for her. I always try to comfort her when ever she talks about her boy, I get silent no response than few days ignoring her after that again she came with a new problem...
• Jamaica
15 Aug 10
ok well this girl defends me in alot of situations and tells me that she loves me and i am her heartbeat etc....she said she doesnt want me to leave her...lol funny eh?
@bokal2703 (802)
• Philippines
15 Aug 10
it's good that you have the promise of friendship. However, it isn't fair for you to stay and expect that you will be more than friends since I guess she really doesn't feel the same way or at least like you as much you like her. You will just expose yourself to a bigger heartache if you keep on waiting and let her make you as an option. So it will be wiser for you to start making yourself busy about other things or much better give yourself a chance to go out with other girls until you find the right one for you instead of being a "spare" to your girl best friend who already has a bf...good luck
• Jamaica
15 Aug 10
lol yeah i like your style..thanks anyway..
• India
15 Aug 10
this is the general character of girls.loving the friend whom we know very well is a very big deal for us.we can lead the life very happily.they can understand us.then there is no need to hide our original character.we can live ourselves only,no need to act.so i loving a best friend is best in my view.
@clevengay (129)
• Philippines
15 Aug 10
that's very difficult..my only advice is to stop what u feel for her and just moved on..find another girl that you can start a relationship with..just make yourself busy so that you can forget her...
• Jamaica
15 Aug 10
Yes that i will definitely do...
• United States
14 Aug 10
The problem here is that you don't know what you are.... friends, lovers there is no line drawn between the two. What is needed here is some boundaries. If you made your proposal and she chose another relationship then she doesn't want that kind of relationship with you. You need to move on! If there is a true bond between the two of you and you wish to remain friends, you need to define that friendship and set boundaries so there is no confusion in the future. If you can not remain friends within those boundaries, then you need to part ways on move on. Good Luck.
• Jamaica
15 Aug 10
yeah thanx for the help..i thought of that though but i juste wanted other people's opinion...
• Philippines
15 Aug 10
Asking a longtime friend or shall we say best friend is the most difficult thing to do. The respect of being a plain friend is there and its hard to convince one in persuading once feelings on her. Perhaps you should take your time thinking on the consequences it may result into if you're going to push this up. But if you are that madly in love with her, then show a different level of relationship when you're together for her to feel different. Different than that of being a regular freindly relationship.
@aaronfyzeon (1920)
• Philippines
15 Aug 10
Being in love with your best friend is really always a difficult situation you will put you yourself in to. Especially if you are already committed it will make it sound worse. If you can just stay away from each other then that is the best thing you can do to protect the love that you have for your significant others. Three years are not that long to sacrifice one thing for the love of your wife. Please choose what will be the best for the both of you. If you really love her and will continue to have a relationship with her being more than friends then you will be doing injustice to yourself. If you will choose the one whom you married then your life will just be easier although you will not be that happy because you think about your best friend. Just choose what is best. Have a great week.
@BigTips (304)
• China
15 Aug 10
This is really a confused relationship between you and your friends. At first, I have to say that it is not your falut even if you fall in love with your best friend. However, you should be careful and think it twice whethere you need to let her know. You see, if you let her realize of the detailed information of your mind, then if she can't accept your further friendship - love, then you will lose the best friend at the same time, do you understand? This is the key to this confused situation. So, try doing something to let her know youd idea at present, but you should not show her your real thought directly.