Separated

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I am waiting for a sign, anything.. for what God wants me to do. This morning this jumped out at me "The Lord will fight for you; you need to be only still". So I went for a walk and climbed up in the ol barn in the hay loft and sat there awhile trying to make sense of things. While in the midst of my thoughts I notice butterflies every where. On the ground, in the barn; they were all around me. Little orange ones, a great big yellow one, these beautiful black ones with blue and purple on the bottom of their wings and then 2 brown ones landed one on each foot. And they were almost mirror image in their markings of a white and orange spots with their wings tipped in white. The one on my right foot seemed to stay forever and a day. Butterflies symbolize change,transition,beauty,freedom,lightness, naturalness,purity, wisdom,everlasting knowledge,long life,joyous times,marital bliss...Was this a sign that in this turmoil these things are to follow? I really feel like God is working on both of us and the passage what God has joined together let no man tear apart. I made my husband feel unwanted and invisible. I love him from the very depths of my soul! but I really don't know how to free myself to recieve or give love. He thinks I have never loved him and nothing could be further from the truth. I knew when we met we were meant to be.