Severely Depressed

United States
August 22, 2010 9:23am CST
I am severely depressed, and hoping that someone here can make me feel better. As some of you know, I have been living in an awful living situation and have to trying to get out of it, for the sake of my health. It causes me severe stress everyday and I feel like I am going to have a nervous breakdown because of it. I just called about a house for rent. It sounded perfect. And then I had to ask if they would take section 8 rental assistance because that is what I am getting. I could never afford to pay rent due to being disabled. Well, they wouldn't agree to it and it severely depressed me. I feel like I am going to be stuck in this hell for the rest of my life. Since I was approved for disability it did lift a small weight off of me, the financial stress and it also told me I could finally get out of this place. But it is going to be like picking a needle out of a haystack. Hardly no-one will take section 8 or pets. My poor kitty. I am in for a lot of rejections. But how to I take this stress in the meantime? Until I can get out of here?? My neighbor is awful. She is not only disturbing my peace but every tenent around me now. Friday night she was outside all night practically with her friends booming rap music from a car and there were tons of kids running around screaming, banging up against the building and my door, and ect.. It was awful. I just locked my self in my bedroom. But I could still hear all the noise. I am surprised that the police were'nt called by someone. But I won't do it. I guess cause I am not a bad person. It is hard to believe that this was a nice quiet place when i first moved here. Now it is like hell. The daily noise is about to cause me a nervous breakdown and I don't know what to do. When I feel this way I usually pray. It helps a little. Any other suggestions??? I will keep looking and won't ever give up. Not until I am out of here. Thank goodness I see my therapist tomorrow.
8 people like this
18 responses
@gabs8513 (48803)
• United Kingdom
24 Aug 10
Hi there Largirl I am so sorry you are going through all of this but I think you can only do what you are doing and that is keep looking Is there nothing that can be done about this Neighbour it sounds terrible I think you just need to try and shut it out I know it is not easy but that is all you can do really I really hope that you will find somewhere soon
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Aug 10
Hi there gabs8513, Thanks for caring. Nothing can be done about this neighbor. She is the most selfish, unkind person I have ever met. I have never done anything to her and she hates me because I want peace and quiet. I know I will get out of here someday. I have to patient. Which is what I don't have alot of ... patience. Especially when I am in pain. I try to shut it out, but it is hard. How would you cope with daily severe headaches and someone above you stomping banging all the time?? I have a short fuse, which I need to learn how to control. Thankyou again, I will continue to pray.
2 people like this
@gabs8513 (48803)
• United Kingdom
24 Aug 10
I had a Neighbour like that once and she was actually evicted in the end I just wish I could give you advice on this as no it is nice what you are putting up with but I really don't know what to suggest
1 person likes this
@bystander (2294)
• Philippines
24 Aug 10
considering the geographical gap, i can only wish you well...
• United States
24 Aug 10
Thanks for your wishes. It is nice to know that there are people out there who care.
@bystander (2294)
• Philippines
24 Aug 10
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (46939)
• United States
22 Aug 10
Hey there! Im so sorry. It seemed things were looking up and then comes another bump in the road. I didn't have a hard time finding a place that took pets, I just had a hard time finding a place that took pets and wouldn't charge me an arm and a leg for a pet deposit. Of course I wasn't eligible for a house. So that is a headache you have that I never had. I mean you have responsibilities I never have had and don't think I could handle. And I really hope someone can help you out. Is there anyone at the Housing Authority that has any advice? Or should I say any helpful advice... I know it is different every place, but at my housing authority they would let you come in and talk to them about it and give you information on how to go about it all once you got on section 8.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Aug 10
Hey girl! At least finances are looking up! I start getting my money by sept 1st so thats good! You are lucky you didn't have a hard time with the pet thing. I think most people are against dogs. Some, do allow cats, so I have to think about that. What is harder is finding someone to take section 8 cause most of the landlords have had troublemakers and destroy their property. So they don't want to trust anyone else. The most damage I have ever had is koolaide stains on the carpet my son made! I am still trying to figure out how to get them out!! Any ideas??? I know they will charge me to replace this carpet if I don't get them out before I move. Then, goodbye deposit! At the housing authority they have rentals sometimes posted on a board outside the office so I can look there. Thanks for the advice, and hope everything is well with you. I will just keep looking. I know I am in for alot of rejections, but I have to figure out how to handle. Just not give up.
@Iequate2 (280)
• United States
22 Aug 10
Hello lagirl1966, I can understand how you feel. It is dreadful living with rude neighbors. I have experienced the same problem once in my life. The only thing that you can do is move for the sake of having a peace of mind. Until your benefits come, do research on your new living places. Drive through the neighborhood. Talk with people in the neighborhood. Moreover, if you are renting apartments. You can go online, and people have rated different apartments. I think it is called "Rate My Apartment." Until then, pray to God to get you through. One thing that I did, I made noise too!! This was a few weeks before I moved. I was younger then. :) Time to Laugh! ********************************************************** Finally, I read in the "Readers Digest" Picture this: A Sergeant is standing in front of his troops. He says soldiers prepare for a 50 mile hike today! A private speaks out, Sir, can't we just follow you on Twitter! LOL :)
• United States
23 Aug 10
Thanks for that funny saying. I had a laugh. I live in a small town so going online dosent do much good cause most of the rentals are not listed there. Mostly in our local news paper and some on craigslist. I don't ever want to rent another apartment again. This is the first one I ever rented here, and I hate it. Previously I was in rental houses and duplexes and that is what I want. I hate renting at my age, but I don't have a choice. I saw a rating for this place and it wasn't good. Unfortunately, it wasn't until I was moved in here. I can drive through the neighborhoods though. I grew up here and I know my town really well, so I can do that. Thanks for the advice. Take care
@Angelgirl16 (2177)
• United States
22 Aug 10
Hi lagirl1966, I am really sorry for the pain, physical and emotional, that you are feeling in your life. Your pain is real and I can see why you would be at the end of your rope. However, you must try to look for a bright side to all of this. As difficult as things are in your life, some one is usually in a worse place and in worse conditions than you are. I don't know how debilitating you disability is, but if it doesn't prevent you from getting out of the house, you should get out of the house and do something that will cheer you up. Knowing that depression is a very serious condition, I am happy to hear that you are seeking professional help. I am also very happy to hear that you believe in prayer. I know some days you may not think it is worth the time to pray, but don't stop. Praying will help keep you strong in hope. Cry if you must, but don't stop praying, and one day everything will fall into place for you. There are landlords that will take section 8, and pets, you just wait and see. God will not leave you alone, he has the perfect place for you. Have faith.
• United States
23 Aug 10
First of all, I would like to opologize to all of you for not responding sooner, but I am not usually online at night. Angelgirl, my disability is all internal and some external but I am not in a wheelchair for anything. But I am in pain everyday. Mostly with backpain and headaches that won't stop. I really don't go anywhere except for doctor appointments and errends. I can't stand being outside especially with the heat. I can't stand the heat because I sweat so badly. And with these headaches I have to stay cool. I have been in therapy for years with my depression. It suddenly got worse when I got ill. And this living situation made it even worse. I do pray, alot. And I cry to sometimes. I hope you are right. I hope God will allow me to find the perfect place where I will get the peace and quiet I need. I am sure that some of my health problems will be cured when that happens because I will be rid of stress. Thanks for your kind thoughts and advice.
• United States
23 Aug 10
Hi lagirl1966, I understand. Your condition keeps you from moving about freely. I just hope you can found your perfect place really soon. The sun has to shine sooner or later, lets pray that it is sooner. God bless
• United States
22 Aug 10
Depression is the ultimate evil of all health conditions friend. I know as I am the queen of depression. Although the exterior side of me normally would not show my depressive states, I can certainly tell you that depression is something I have been undergoing my entire life. I am so sorry lagirl that you are experiencing this, best advice I can give you is to try your hardest to maintain yourself busy during the long depressing thoughts. Our brains have a way of getting the best of us. From time to time, I have to just climb into bed and a good cry normally alleviates for the moment. Keep making friends on here and keep responding to discussions, you will find that you are not the only one in this situation. You will also find that you will be of great comfort to another fellow myLotter in the same if not worst situation. Pray, keep active and try really try not to continue to think so much, it is the main culprit. Hugs to you and have a Blessed Sunday.
• United States
22 Aug 10
Thankyou for your advice. I will try. Depression is horrible. I have had it my whole life also. But when bad things happen to you, and you have alot of stress, your medication won't help at all. I had that cry this morning, right after the rejection of calling about that house. I know I have to get ahold of myself. I will keep coming on here of course. It is my only outlet to the outside world. I hope to find someone else in this exact situation so we can be there for each other. I will try not to think so much, but it is hard. I have to get out my frustrations. I can't keep them bottled up. Or I will explode.! Thanks so much again.
• United States
22 Aug 10
You are very welcome, and Lord knows I know about losses. Take care and have a bit of fun so keep myLotting.
• United States
23 Aug 10
Check out gosection8.com on the Internet. That is where a lot of landlords who offer section 8 housing list them. I hope this helps. The best of luck to you.
• United States
23 Aug 10
Thankyou, but ive been to that website and they only list two apartment complexes on it. This one and another one which is even worse than this one. I know I will find a house or duplex cause I have found one before here. I just have to be patient. Thankyou
@tovk12 (226)
• India
23 Aug 10
That is a very depressing post and am very sorry for you. Dont worry everything happens for the best. I am sure you will get a good place soon which you can afford and will take your kitty too. Dont loose hope in God. He always does what is best for you. As for your neighbor, I would suggest, go ahead and complain to your landlord. If your neighbors are also troubled you should all go together and complain to your landlord or the police. That should help a bit. Best of Luck!!!
• United States
23 Aug 10
Thankyou. I know that God is watching over me and trying to help me. I know something will pop up someday. As for my neighbor, Ive been living with this for 2 years now (ive lived here 5) and Ive gone round and round with the management. They are taking her side in it. Which isn't fair, ive been here longer! Thanks alot
@derek_a (10903)
23 Aug 10
As a therapist myself, I am pleased that you are visiting a therapist to help with your depression. Most of us get depressed at time, and like you I got pretty low when we discovered we had noisy neighbours that had all-night parties several times a week. Fortunately, I practice meditation and learned to deal with it without too much confrontation before such time that we could move away from there. I hope things work out for you well. One of the best things that I advise my clients with depreesion is to achieve something every day, no matter how small so that they can stand back and say, "I did that!". I send my best wishes to you. _Derek
• United States
23 Aug 10
Thankyou Derek, My therapist is a treasure. I don't know what I would do without her. What really helps, is having my son home with me. Then it dosen't get to me so much. I don't know why I can't stand the noise. He deals with it just fine. It dosent seem to bother him. But he is only 16 so that is probably why. I think it is cause I am always in pain. Nothing is worse than being in pain (especially with headaches) and having constant noise above your head. I see my therapist today so that will really help. I use to do meditation, and I really could do it again, at night or early in the morning when I get up. Then it is actually quiet here. I will try to achieve. If I can ever get rid of the pain. Thanks
@ladygator (3469)
• United States
23 Aug 10
I am so sorry that you are dealing with this. But you have to really remember that you cant control anyone else. Could you possibly ask her to be more quiet at a certain time of the night? I know that probably is not possible. I really hope that you can resolve this or at least hold your peace until you can move out of there. Try to find what makes your peace firmer and and calms you. Bless you.
• United States
23 Aug 10
Thankyou for caring. That is why I like coming on here. There are so many kind people here. No way at all to talk to her. She is very selfish. My only option is to move out. So I will keep remembering that God is with me and will allow me to get out of here when the perfect place pops up. I just can't give up looking no matter what. I use to meditate, and it did help, but you need quiet for that! Thanks again
@raven66 (335)
• Canada
22 Aug 10
It seems in your situation all you can do is get some earplugs and/or listen to some relaxing music with quality earphones... Also I would try to go outside and find more peacfull places like woods parks or cemeteries.. and bring good books...but the MOST important thing is to keep in touch with other people in your situation ...such as help groupd councilers..etc.. I also suffer from depression but not being alone does help very much. best all the best!
• United States
22 Aug 10
Hi raven, I have tried earplugs and they don't work. I have two fans running in my bedroom (where I spend most of my time) but it dosen't cover the noise all the time. Lately I have just been enduring it. If it gets unbearable, I usually just slam my bedroom door and it stops. She has been sending them outside since its summer which really helps. But now they are disturbing other tenents by doing that. They are the noisiest kids I have ever seen. I would go outside but I have bad allergies and I have to stay in the air conditioning. That, and I can't take the heat and it is VERY hot here now. Thankyou for the comment
@Sakura24 (175)
• Philippines
22 Aug 10
I am sorry about what you are going through, just don't give up on every trial that comes in your way maybe God has a reason why He gave you these things. If you can afford, then you can move out in your place and just find a better one. Always being stressed can add up to what you are feeling right now. Just pray always and don't forget to call Him whenever you are lonely, you can't see Him but he will definitely hear you. He is just teaching you, if your faith is really strong or not. God doesn't give us trials in which we can't carry, He knows that you can make it through. I hope your Therapist can help you cope with your problems. Just tell her everything that you feel and you are also sharing to us, at least somehow we can also help you with our advises. If you are stressed maybe you can do deep breathing exercise, it can really help you calm down and slows downs your heart rate.You can also do imagery, just imagine that you are in a certain place that you are free of stress. Maybe that can also help.. a kind of distraction from your stress.
• United States
22 Aug 10
Hi Sakura24, I know that God is letting me go through this for a reason. I just don't know why. When I recieve my money for disability I can move. Which will be in a couple weeks. But in my town, it will be hard to find a place that accepts those things. Not very many people want pets in their place and I have a kitty. I will never give him up. My faith is pretty strong, but sometimes I wonder why God is putting me through this. I have made a lot of mistakes in my life and I just hope no one is punishing me for them. My therapist is wonderful person. I treasure her and she always helps me feel better. I will try the breathing. I hope it helps. The only place that I would like to be right now, is somewhere where there is peace and quiet. Thankyou
• Philippines
22 Aug 10
well, it must be hard people outside are literally doesn't give a damn about quietness of other people. In my case, things changed around this part of the Neighborhood since the road became almost a Highway. the area is now commercialized and we are one of the original households left who doesn't have commercial rent. knowing our house isn't that spontanous, people had been throwing garbage in our place and then some are peeing near the electric post out side our house. at least, there aren't noise like the ones you experienced. still, they lack respect to property.
• United States
22 Aug 10
I am sorry that you are not getting respect where you live also. But I must say, you are so lucky to live in your own house. That is what I want more than anything. My son deserves that. He will be 17 next week. The tenents in this complex, there are very good people here to, but they stay mostly inside thier apartments like me, because of all these people moving in here. They also throw garbage everywhere so, they are constantly breaking the lease. But the management won't do anything about it. It is not fair. Thanks for your comment and I hope this stops at your place to. What has happened to this world? Are there not kind people left at all anywhere who respect others??
• United States
28 Feb 11
Hope this helps. Visit this website. They should be able to offer you some assistance. http://www.dbsalliance.org Please keep us updated. Depression can be a kick in the emotions and those additional stressors you refer to do not help. Please keep us informed. Kindest regards, Dave
• India
21 Oct 10
Welcome to mylot I am sorry to hear this, depression is really bad, try to keep yourself busy in some active thing like hanging with friends, do some work at home, even in computer, try to forget that you are depressed, never remain alone, don't luck yourself in bedroom.. Thanks for sharing. Professor. . Cheers
@besthope44 (12145)
• India
5 Oct 10
Laughter is best medicine to all disease so as the stress. It will through the pressure in mind and lightens it and feel happy.
@CatsandDogs (13964)
• United States
27 Aug 10
Hey lagirl.... You were just approved for disability so you should be on cloud 9 right now!! What the heck are you doing depressed? At least you're out of the 'hole' that you were once in! Sweetie, you really need to stop and think a little bit and count your blessings. Maybe then you'll cheer up a bit. Now something else to tell you, when my parents rented their rental house to those scum bags, they were on section 8 as well however, my parents didn't sign off on anything but instead, these people went to where ever they went to and got the money and gave it to my parents and in turn, my parents gave them a receipt. Maybe you could check into doing that? I don't know because I've never dealt with that before so I haven't a clue how it all works but it wouldn't hurt to ask. Now here's a joke for you that my grandmother told me.... What did the blind man say when he walked into the fish store? Hello girls!!
• Malaysia
22 Aug 10
I'm so sorry to read your post. I'm new to myLot. If i were you and if i had the capacity, i would have moved somewhere else.But i know it's not that easy for you. I hope i can help u if u are just nearby.I hope that your therapist will not just give his/her help by advise, but also in actions. Wish you all the best..