Stop looking at my messages. Do you understand Privacy?

@dream_ozn (1758)
Singapore
August 28, 2010 8:27am CST
How do you feel when someone else, perhaps your friend look at your personal things such as you phone messages? I don't mind lending them my phone or laptop to play, but they should refrain from looking at my messages, emails and that include messenger as well. I personally think that looking at other people's SMS is a very rude thing to do. This is one basic respect that we should have for one another. As much as I am tempted to do so, I will tell myself that each person has their own privacy and that we should respect it. No matter how close am I to my friend, I will not pick up her phone and peek into her messages. How about you? Have you have such encounters? What were your feelings then?
2 people like this
17 responses
@AutumnGold (1062)
28 Aug 10
Hello Dream_ozn. I always keep my phone with me when I'm out, I wouldn't want anyone seeing my messages whether they're private or not, I have nothing to hide but my messages are none of their business. I always log out of my emails when I'm finished and I never save the password so no one has access to my email or messenger when I'm not using my computer. I wouldn't look at anyone else's messages so I expect others to respect that.
28 Aug 10
My passwords are very similar so it's easy to remember them. It only takes a few seconds to enter a password so it's not an inconvenience to me at all. If you can memorise your passwords it won't take long to change your browser settings then your privacy will be guarded.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
29 Aug 10
Great. From now, I shall change my passwords to the same throughout and stop letting my browser do the work for me! Thanks!
@ynahh1 (454)
31 Aug 10
It was very rude if other was looking for your private message.But it was funny to say that we are just being puzzle or intrigue on what the message all about.To tell you honestly i was also looking to my husband cellphone message to double check if his being honest to me.But i admit my mistake i think all should have the what we call privacy.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
31 Aug 10
I do, check on my BF cellphone messages as well just to check if he is honest with me, or what are some things he is chatting with his friends. At times I really feel that I should not do that, but sometimes, I just cannot help but read them. We should really respect each other's privacy. Just interested, in future, will you still look at your husband's messages?
• India
29 Aug 10
even i am like lol , its very irritating too , some friends does this to read those sms, and these guys wont change at all, y dont they understand such thing,
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
30 Aug 10
Yes, it is really extremely irritating when others look at our things. Even after tell them that we don't like it, they will not stop it. These people should really learn how to start respecting.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
29 Aug 10
Whether you are a friend or neighbor or co-worker or even a stranger, you should not looke at other people's messages. if they ask you to do this, that is different. Everyone deserves to have their privacy. You can feel violated when someone reads a message intended for your eyes only. It is just common courtesy and respect to not read the messages of others without permission.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
30 Aug 10
I definitely feel violated when some people pick up my things to read them. You mentioned permission. Unless we are given permission by other, I will never even pick up their phone!
@witty06 (40)
• Philippines
29 Aug 10
Hi there! I agree about it. Well, if you really have the sense of respect attitude you really can't dare to read or touch some private stuff which isn't yours..even how close you are to the person. You'll need to ask permission really. I basically hate when someone read or open some mails especially belongs to me. Have a nice day!!
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
30 Aug 10
You mentioned it! No matter how tempted I am to look at my friends messages, I don't dare to do it. But there are just some people who are really thick skinned that they are not concerned about it. They should have enough common sense to know that they should respect others privacy!
@atv818 (1988)
• United Arab Emirates
29 Aug 10
No matter how much technologically advance we are now, privacy should still be in practice. Regardless of what the gadget is, we must respect the privacy of others. This should be done not only to our friends and people we hardly know, but also be a way of life toward our family members.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
29 Aug 10
I agree with you atv818. Although we have Facebook, we have Twitter and many other social media which connects us to one another, privacy is still a basic thing which everyone should respect.
@jennbart (1332)
• Philippines
29 Aug 10
I do not like it. When I learn people or my friends read my personal messages, I tell tell to mind their own business. Then get my phone and never to lend them my phone again.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
29 Aug 10
Neither do I like it when my friends lead over to read my messages when I am typing. Yes, and I will remember never to lend them my phone again. Since they cannot respect other people's privacy, then why should we allow them to even touch our phones! Cheers!
@jamed28 (1909)
• Philippines
29 Aug 10
Private stuff are said private so it's for the eyes of the person only. Not even my closest friends should see it. This is where you can see the respect and honesty of your friends.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
29 Aug 10
Yes, it's only for the eyes of the person. No matter how close a friend is to me, I wouldn't want him/her to look at my messages. If he or she does it repeatedly, it simply show that this person has no respect for the property of others.
@thesids (22351)
• Bhubaneswar, India
29 Aug 10
Many people have that disgusting habit of peeking around and encroaching the privacy of others. They do it for two reasons as I see it - 1. Out of curiosity - just to know what have you been doing with your gadget or 2. Spying on you - Trying to find out what have you been using your gadget for and later they can nail you! However some do it unintentionally and I ignore them - they understand just when I give them a warning. But the cause of disgust is the first category. I think I am strict enough and do not hand out my personal stuff to anyone except my wife - I think this is okay with me as I really dont care about others and my wife, I trust her and feel that she has every right to have a peek whenever she feels like!
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
29 Aug 10
Yes, most people see others private things due to curiosity. I myself admit that I am curious at times too. Thinking of picking up my friend's phone just to take a look. However, I refrain myself from doing such things. If it is unintentionally, then it is alright, as they don't mean anything. My boyfriend has the same attitude as you have towards your wife. Sometimes I do take a look at his stuffs to see what he is doing. Well, I don't do it everyday and it's not on purpose. As I do pack his things for him, I can't possibly throw it away without looking at it. He too, feels that I have a right to peek in if I feels like it. However, I sometimes do feel that I should not be looking at his accounts at all. What's your take on this?
• United States
29 Aug 10
Strange, I've actually never had the temptation to look through my friend's messages... This all depends on how much you reveal in your messages. Do you hold intimate conversations with your soul mate that unravels your whole person? or, do you hastily send out and receive arriving and departing text messages, such as "K i'm leaving now" or "hey i'm here where are you?" I don't have many people I can "text" with, but when I do, our conversations are usually mundane; they do not unearth our inner beings, just pick at the atmosphere. We save the real conversations for phone calls or actual interaction. But, sometimes, we do hold "secretive" conversations through text messaging, and it is an invasion of privacy when somebody looks through them.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
29 Aug 10
Wow, you never had the temptation before? That's great, because I sometimes do have the thought of picking up my friend's phone if there is no one around but me. Well, of course, I do refrain myself from doing it, as I understand that it is rude. Most of my messages are really mundane ones, but there are some others which are sent to my boyfriends, or some girl's talk which we wouldn't want others to be a part of it. Many a time, we are too caught up with our daily life that we seldom meet our friends for actual interaction, and thus, this leads to SMS-ing!
• United States
29 Aug 10
I think that when people do that they often have a trust issue. My hubby and I have separate phones, accounts online, bank accounts and paypal accounts. He discusses choices with me before making decisions but I would not ever go into his accounts just to check his messages. We don't have texting so that is not an issue. Sometimes we will go into each others accounts in facebook or sidetick just to check something for the other person. Just like here in mylot, I have to read his posts when he makes them because I don't always know what post he has made and I will respond to it. I don't use my hubby's phone. I don't even know who all his friends are on his cell phone or messengers. I trust him so why would I have to know?
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
29 Aug 10
Hi Lindaharding, It's great to know that you and your hubby have the trust for each other, and that both of you respect each other's privacy, and that you have no problem with it. I'm glad that you have found the love of your life and that you are enjoying it. However, many of us, including myself, find it difficult to not look at my boyfriend's/husband account information etc. Are there times when you are really tempted to just sneak into your hubby's accounts just for a peak? And for me, I think I would learn to trust my boyfriend more.
29 Aug 10
Maybe is just curiosity ..You never look to someone sms book? I dont do this kind of stuff when that person special ask me not to do that, and i dont bother someone else stuff but i just asking. And if his your friend i dont know what he cand view in thge emails or sms because you already speak with him about your stuff. Anyway remember not to give those persons again your cell or lapto, or better just put privacy codes on them and you will never face that again.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
29 Aug 10
I admit when I was younger, I have the tendency to look at others messages. However, as I grew up, I knew that doing so is some thing rude and is not respectful. Thus, I never looked at my friends messages unless they show it to me. Yes, I will learn to put privacy codes on my various devices so as to prevent such things from occurring again. Thanks for you comments!
@alex_raju (173)
• India
28 Aug 10
Ha a nice discussion...I used to peek like you said some time ago.Those days i wasn't aware of my act.These days i always ask him\her if i wanted to read the messages.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
29 Aug 10
Yes, when I was younger, I used to peek into other people messages too. But those were the days, I now make sure I don't do that anymore no matter how tempting it is. It is simply too rude.
• India
28 Aug 10
It has happened to me so many times that friends take my cell phone and check my messages. I have private messages from my boyfriend in my inbox and I don't like anyone going through them. Now I make it a point to keep my inbox and sent messages empty all the time. The messages which are really special are saved in a separate folder which is password protected. It would have been extremely difficult for me if my phone didn't have the feature of password protection. As far as laptop is concerned...I hardly give it to anyone. I give it to only those whom I really trust and know that they won't peek into my folders or email.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
28 Aug 10
Yes, I used to delete all the messages in my phone inbox as well, so my mum would not be able to read my messages. However, I have since move out to live and thus, felt that no one would be so rude. But, I overlooked that I will still go out with friends and there are some who does not have any manners but to go around picking up people's phone to dig for information. By deleting all your messages in your phone inbox, do you get tired of it? I felt tired after a few years of making sure my inbox is cleared every day I get home.
• Philippines
28 Aug 10
This thing also happened to me. It just irritated me. I don't want anyone snooping around my stuff.
@dream_ozn (1758)
• Singapore
28 Aug 10
Hi Frontvisions101, I agree that it super irritating. It just feels uncomfortable to have other poking their nose into our stuff!
@jennbart (1332)
• Philippines
2 Sep 10
I also see other people peeking at my text messages in escalators. When I text someone, I always sense that people above me at peeking at my cellphone. Or sometimes at jeepneys. I would often look at them with a dagger look!
@jamed28 (1909)
• Philippines
29 Aug 10
Private stuff are said private so it's for the eyes of the person only. Not even my closest friends should see it. This is where you can see the respect and honesty of your friends.