How do you judge character?

@catch_me (930)
India
September 5, 2010 2:12am CST
I think this is something that everyone does, sometimes without even realising that they are doing it. for my self the best way for me to judge character is to go out to a restaurant with someone...and watch how they order their food, eat, treat the staff, etc...this comes from years of waiting on tables. however, i have found that the majority of times, if someone is rude to a server, i really don't want to be friends with them, the bad characteristics carry over. so what i want to know is...does anyone else have an unusual way of assesing someone's personality, the clincher, if you will, if someone is acceptable friendship material?
2 people like this
11 responses
@sunshynn (17)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
I think one's true character can only be known to you if that person is already comfortable with you and let's you see his traits. I also think that one's character is at its magnified state when there is a problem that faces a person. How one responds is a test of character. Traveling alone also makes one know his own character. You get to spend time with yourself and realize how have you changed through the years as you respond to seeing new places, meeting new people, encountering travel glitches and spending time with yourself.
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
Traveling with someone too is a great time to know the character of that person. All that time in enclosed spaces or in running mode or how he treats people are consistently visible, thus giving you a fair chance of knowing the person truly.
@LIENROSE (911)
• Philippines
6 Sep 10
I do love reading Psychology books, and its nice knowing and dealing with others with scientific basis, but i am not a judgmental person, after all we must need to know each other well before making any judgment
6 Sep 10
This is precisely what I do! I do it because I want to know how people interact with strangers. If a guy that I'm out on a date with is rude to the server or bartender, I make a mental note to ask for separate checks once dinner is over. I wouldn't necessarily decide not to be someone's friend over that once incident, but I would take their behavior into consideration.
@niairen01 (1018)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
more often than not i could feel if a certain person got a bad personality. just one look and i can already feel the aura over flowing. with this said, I usually stay clear out of those people. It never fails me. I don't know why but I'm like that. but if a person seems okay I still take time to observer if i could be friends and trust that person. but no, I still have to be with that person most of the time to exactly judge that person's character.
@StarBright (2799)
• United States
5 Sep 10
Hello Catch_me. The restaurant date is a very good start for judging character. Take a good look at how people treat people that they feel are not their equal or people who cannot do anything for them. Users seem to find it easy to kiss up to those who can advance their cause but they are quick to step on anyone who is of no value to them. Egotistical people are also quick to put down anyone who threatens their feeling of superiority. Usually a restaurant is the perfect place for users, egotists and other bad actors to act out their agression and feel justified in doing so. That said, if the restaurant gives impeccable service, you may have to find some other venue where there is some degree of ordinary stress that will test the limits of the ordinary person. Try creating a minor diversion that deviates from the normal routine. See how the person handles change. How flexible can they be? Maybe they are good as long as everything goes their way. There are a lot of variables in looking atcharacter. But, the restaurant is a good start ot see if you want to explore further.
• United States
5 Sep 10
I believe that actions speak louder than words. You can tell me your going to do something, but I'll only believe you until you do it. I'm also a big believer that past actions determine future actions. If a person has done something before, then it's gonna be easier for them to do it again in the future.... and it's gonna be harder for them to not do it. Amir http://moneysexandeverythingelse.blogspot.com
@yogeshdhusa (2237)
• India
5 Sep 10
Now a days its very difficult to judge any one. When a person is genuine in their behavior then we can judge it. But a person has a mask on their face can’t be judge. Well the inner self cant be kept hidden for long time. Some or other day we will come to know the truth. So I don’t judge people so soon I wait till it come’s out on its own.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
5 Sep 10
We all have different ways that we judge character. I try not to judge people unfairly. i try to judge people by the way they present themselves to me. You can learn alot about people from their behaviors and attitudes. that is the way people should be judged, not for their actions or mistakes or flaws we think we might see in them.
• India
5 Sep 10
IT is not such a simple method to judge someone with their behavior in the restaurant... may be that character may not the real one.. it is difficult to judge someone only by their way of speech.. even it may be noted by the way they take the responsibility and the true care toward someone..
@Metatronik (5923)
• Pasay, Philippines
5 Sep 10
The consistency of how he/she converse with other people. If they project themselves that much like they are proving something good that he/she wants you to feel that you must glorify that person then that's it.
• India
5 Sep 10
When I was studying in college, I had attended one training session and I learned your impression is made up of Visual (appearance, mannerism, posture, etc.) 65% Tone (pitch, pace, volume, projection, etc.) 25% Content (words, message) – 10% You have to look at them and study their behaviors/facial expressions/body language and listen to them openly and then understand what they all mean... The most important thing is INTERPRETATION because I think we all are able to observe but few people are able to INTERPRET its meaning As per my opinion body language is the most important thing to judge character....