Just when you think you have everything planned.....life interferes.

@Erilyn (3020)
United States
September 19, 2010 5:51pm CST
A while ago I came back to the lot after having to be away for a while, and I at that time said that I wouldn't go away like that again. Then my world got turned upside down again. I lost my job, I lost my house, and basically have had to start all over again. It has seemed to me that just when you think everything is fine again you hit a brick wall and it takes forever to recover. Why is it (or does it seem anyway) that as soon as you have everything planned out something happens and turns it all upside down? They say that everything happens for a reason, but I am starting to wonder if that really is the case or just that the cosmos hates a void. What do you think? Is it crazy to think that it is impossible sometimes to live without having to deal with all the "pain" of life?
2 people like this
14 responses
@dawnald (84131)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Sep 10
Oh wow, I was wondering what had happened to you. Have you gotten work since then and started to put things back together? You can avoid the pain of life, but will it avoid you? Seriously, I think some of us have easier lives than others, but nobody totally avoids pain.
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Sep 10
Im working but things arent getting back to normal yet. It really hasnt been normal for a longtime, but hopefully soon it will be. I dont know how soon though lol. I am going to try to get on here as often as possible but my internet connection is spotty. I wasnt able to get on for almost 2 days. I really am going to try to do better about getting online and try to stay on top of things.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84131)
• Shingle Springs, California
23 Sep 10
Well get on when you can, but it isn't worth making yourself crazy over!
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Sep 10
I know I have already been dealing with the stress in different ways. I have lost my hair due to stress, I had 4 bald spots for a while but its finally growing back. So Im trying.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (90406)
• Chile
19 Sep 10
In my experience, just when we start to thing everything is turning just right, something happens. But it also works the other way around: when we are in an abyss, something beautiful happens and brings us up. Life hits you many times and the scars are always there. But you also learn to count your blessings and I´m sure everyone has their own. Take care! You are only speaking of material loses.
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@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
19 Sep 10
I just seems like no matter what happens I cant seem to get it back together. My relationship is suffering, and everything else. But you are right it will come back around im sure.
@marguicha (90406)
• Chile
20 Sep 10
It´s not that easy, dear. I lost the same year my husband of almost 40 years and one of my grandsons to cancer. It has been over 10 yeras and it´s not over. But I still can feel blessed for what I have had. Don´t take me wrong: sometimes I would like to do something really mean to a life that did that to me. But other times I remember that many people never have a good marriage, never have grandchildren, never feel love. A step at a time, that´s all you can do.
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@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
20 Sep 10
Thank you for your encouragement. There are days I would love to spork someone in the eye. Lately those kind of days seem to be coming more frequently. Its just hard when it seems like you are the only one working toward something better, when the people who are supposed to love and respect you don't really seem to care or to want to help you do anything. I think that's the part that has made it the hardest.
@celticeagle (117155)
• Boise, Idaho
20 Sep 10
My story EXACTLY! I have wanted to go travel for about three years now. I actually had all the plans but have fallen into a S.A.D. condition in the winter each time. I have had panic attacks and I realize I probably can't get very far from home without having panic attacks. Yes, life does continually interfere.
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Sep 10
Im sorry that happens to you hun. That would have to make it very difficult to travel. I have heard it can be very debilitating for people. Do you have to take medication for the condition? I have considered going back on anti depressants for a short period of time just to help me get through until things start to look better, but then i realize it may just make matters a bit worse.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (117155)
• Boise, Idaho
23 Sep 10
I am on medication,yes. I used to think I could go off of it for a time(in the summer when I usually feel better)but I found I can't. If you do becareful because some meds are not fun to go off of. You can get some weird side effects. And it is also hard to find the right one sometimes.
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Sep 10
I know I have been on zoloft, prozac,zanax, paxil. I go on them for a while and when i level out and cant take the side effects anymore i come back off them and am good for a few years. Its now been 4 years and I havent been on anything since then. I have been desling rather well without it but right now its all getting rather overwehleming. I have had serious mood swings etc. I can generally tell when its time to go back on them. I am trying to hold out for as long as I can this time and maybe I can get through it with out them. Only time will tell.
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Sep 10
Hon, you are talking to the right person. As a single parent having struggled for quite sometime I was finally heading in the right direction. 9 months ago I lost my job, now lost my house, no income and well there went the happy feelings. So I do know what it is like, but one things for sure we have to pray and have faith and hope for the best as long as we are still breathing. I keep comforting myself everyday with the hopes that things will turn around. Although some days this high spirit really is hard to hold, so I pray that at least the next day that things get better. I will pray for you dear as I know what you are feeling, it isn't Like I can imagine, I know what you are feeling.
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
20 Sep 10
Thank you. I don't know how much more faith I have left really. When you are deemed "homeless" because you live in a hotel, its really hard to keep your held high you know? Everything I make at work goes to this place and there is nothing left. The only good side I can see is that if I were in an apartment right now I would be worse off not being able to pay all the bills. I have been a single parent for years myself, and am going to be a grandmother in January. My daughter is 17. I think what they don't realize when they talk about the state of the economy is people like us.
• United States
20 Sep 10
I am truly sorry you are also going through this as my boyfriend recently also lost his job and we are about to lose our apartment soon as well, hon we have to cling on to something before our sanity gets affected. Be well and God Bless.
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
20 Sep 10
You as well. I am the only one working right now. My BF also lost his job, so it seems that we are both in the nightmare. Its been almost 2 years now. I will keep you and yours in my prayers. We will all get through it eventually I am sure, but its getting hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. maybe if we both look we can maybe find it.
@2004cqui (2823)
• United States
20 Sep 10
Things I've learned! Life happens when you're busy making other plans! If failure is not in your vocabulary you will never fail. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, move on. Life is an adventure or your not living it!
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Sep 10
Very good points. One I also like is The sun will still rise tomorrow. I cant remember when I read it and I didnt think about it until after I read your post!
@2004cqui (2823)
• United States
23 Sep 10
It's probably from the play "Annie" The Sun will come out tomorrow, come what may. My dad told me this and it was really timely for me! As long as you've done the best you can, no one can tell you you didn't do well enough. Comes in handy!
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
25 Sep 10
True true. I havent thought of Annie in years lol. It prolly is from that. And your right I know I have done the best I can. That is going to have to be enough!
@indahfth (11173)
• Indonesia
20 Sep 10
Whatever happens to us, there must be why. Whatever we plan could not be reached. All depends on our efforts.
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
20 Sep 10
And what if you have put everything you can into your efforts with the exclusion of your own health in lack of sleep and everything else? When you put all your efforts into it and it still comes out the same what then?
1 person likes this
@indahfth (11173)
• Indonesia
20 Sep 10
Every effort will definitely get results. In the attempt we must also consider the health or otherwise.
1 person likes this
@zapatee (477)
• Philippines
21 Sep 10
i'm so sorry to hear about your problems, erilyn. but like what the others said here, we all go through the same trials and problems. often when these happens, we need a very good support system, that is our family. but obviously, part of your problem is your family. so i hope they'll be open enough to talk things through with you. because if there is resistance on the part of the people who are supposed to help and share with the problem, things will just be more difficult. so try talking to them and let them hear you out, then listen to what they have to say too. stay strong for yourself, for your dreams, and for everyone and everything else you care about. after all these are over and you're smiling, you'll know that you've become a better person.
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Sep 10
I have tried talking to them, however I get ignored. When I try to tell them about how I feel, it gets turned around and makes it all about them. I am really glad that I have a place to come to and vent it does help a lot. I am trying to stay storng and it just gets harder and harder some days. other days its not so bad.
@Thoroughrob (11756)
• United States
20 Sep 10
I know how you feel. It just seems things just hit one after another. We seem to get a short break just to be thrown into it all over. Good luck with what is going on now.
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Sep 10
Thank you Rob. I am trying to get through it and it does help being able to come to the lot and vent. Not only that, but it helps to know im not alone.
• United Kingdom
20 Sep 10
Life is really strange like that! Whenever things are going well and you think you are on the right path life just love to interfere and get in the way! I've had a lot of plans and goals in the past and some of them have been realised in my life whilst others I just have not achieved! I like the sound of everything happening for a reason and I really hope that this is true! Why must there be pain involved in life? I just don't understand! I sometimes think that it all relates to our mindset and what what we are thinking about at the time! They say that your thoughts are very powerful and that whatever you think about in life whether it be positive or negative, this tends to come into your experience of life. I try to remain positive in life regardless but there are still those tiny nitty gritty things that tend to get in the way when you least expect them. I'm just taking life as it comes now and I'm pretty sure that this is a good way to go. Andrew
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Sep 10
Thank you Andrew, and I really hope there is a reason also. I have tried to stay positive, it gets real difficult when the people around you that are supposed to love you and support you make you feel as if you don't do enough. I think at this point I may have a very hard decision in front of me. I think i need to re-look at things in my life.
• Philippines
20 Sep 10
Hi Erilyn. I am sorry to read of your mishaps. I had been where you are at now and I survived. I don't know how I did but I survived. And I believe I became stronger because of what I went through. Perhaps, that is the reason why we go through trials...to make us stronger and well...knowledgeable in our experience. My cousin once told me...having surpassed one trial, it gives us the strength of overcoming other trials that may come. I suppose you did if you survived for two years. And perhaps, without you realizing it, you are stronger now than you were years ago. You must be to survive all those trials. Keep your head up, dear.
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Sep 10
You are right I just wonder some times how much more I can take before I just lose it completely. Nothing is ever easy, just wish it wasn't this hard. They say God doesn't give you more than you can handle, but I think he needs to double check my load lol.
@joddie (173)
• Philippines
20 Sep 10
hello there... take a breath. you're not alone in your predicament. lots of people are having problems just like yours. i for one also have plenty of it. i just deal my problems one at a time. just keep on thinking that if you're walking on a very dark path now, just keep on moving. sooner the path will have some light until darkness will gone then you can start a new one. pain is always part of our life. it will make us stronger. you can do it. just have faith in God for He will always there to guide you. keep on smiling...
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Sep 10
As messed up as it might sound, I am glad to know that I'm not alone. I am doing the best I can to get through and it is nice to be able to come back to the lot and be able to discuss this with others. It is easier when you can talk about it I think.
• Philippines
20 Sep 10
..almost i planned my life already but life interferes.Everyday i set out goals for myself for that day and try my best, most days, to complete them.but sometimes life interfere.Its hard to admit that I can't get everything done that i want to do.
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
20 Sep 10
It happens like that to me all the time. I had my entire life planned out and it was all ahead of me when Whammo.... it does get really hard. And there is never enough hours in a day.
@Shellyann36 (8918)
• United States
20 Sep 10
Erilyn, first off I am sorry to hear about all of your unfortunate happenings. I also want to let you know that you are not in that situation all alone. Lots of us are having the same problems. I do wish that there was a way to prevent bad things from happening but there is not.I have always been told that "everything happens for a reason" and that " in every cloud there is a silver lining". I try to look at the situation I am in and then remember that there are others with much worse problems. I do hope that things get better for you.
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
20 Sep 10
Thank you. I have heard those same things myself. its not easy when you are in the situation to see past it sometimes. I think that's the point that I have gotten to now. I think its just been so overwhelming for so long now I don't know which way is up anymore. I think I was starting to lose hope, but looking at the responses I have gotten I think I can make it through at least a bit longer. Knowing that you aren't alone helps a lot.
@jugsjugs (13045)
19 Sep 10
I use to feel like what you feel like now.I felt like one minuite that i was on top of the world and really happy with the way my life was and then all of a sudden it takes a down hill spiral and we are really having a bad time of it.The way i see things is that there are always people that are having just as much of a bad time as i am,they are having a worse life than me,that way it stops me from feeling sorry for myself and then i try to get my life in better order.
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
20 Sep 10
im really working on it. Somedays are easier then others. I guess today is one of the bad ones. But you have a good point. It gets really hard sometimes to see the silver lining.