Negative Criticism: Creates a better motivation ?

negative emotion - this photo is attach on discussion pertaining to negative criticism
Philippines
September 24, 2010 9:28pm CST
It feels good when somebody gives you a compliment over a job well done, a negative feedback either will pull a person down or trigger him to do better things. This is true to me, when I was 12 my aunt told me that I am weak and dull, it was the time I prove her wrong when I make it to the top 5 in my class and later in life earn honors in the achievements I deserve. I realize though that it would probably her way of motivating me but it doesn't feel good. Do you believe in this ? Do you have a similar experience? Would you do the same to others ?
5 people like this
14 responses
@formidexo (1351)
• Canada
25 Sep 10
I am more of the encouraging and complimenting type. However, my ex-wife now, once said that I would never make it as a salesman and I took that as a challenge and earned a living as a salesman for 40 years. In one company I became a manager and even trained other sales people. I found a woman on social assistance and coached her to become one of the top salesperson in that company. So don't let anyone steal your dreams. If you think you have it to do something then just let all the negative stuff roll off of you like water off a duck's back. You deserve a
1 person likes this
• Philippines
25 Sep 10
Well said formidexo, you have prove your wife wrong and with that I commend you for a job well done.
1 person likes this
@formidexo (1351)
• Canada
25 Sep 10
From her, it was a slap on the face. But I guess one day I should thank her for challenging me and helping me to embark on a successful career. I once made a sale where I earned about seven thousand Canadian dollars. That was a good afternoon!
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Sep 10
fdfd
• United States
25 Sep 10
Constructive criticism is one thing, but I think that negative criticism would probably really bring me down. I would probably just give up. I know this is a 'toss the towel' in attitude, but it's the truth. Constructive criticism, however, is always appreciated.
1 person likes this
@formidexo (1351)
• Canada
25 Sep 10
I won't be one to rain on your parade but I'll be cheering you.
2 people like this
• United States
25 Sep 10
Thanks, mate! :)
@Hatley (164450)
• Garden Grove, California
25 Sep 10
torchablazed no I would not do that to others as most of us respond to negative criticism in the same way negatively, and just get a lowered self esteem. I would use constructive positive criticism in that I would say you can do that better but you have made an excellent start so you will soon get it all right.Do not tear people down but built them up with positive statements.I do not believe in tearing down any one, just the opposite build up the person's self esteem and they will rise to the occasion with doing much better.
• Philippines
25 Sep 10
Very well said hatley, tearing people apart is such an inhumane thing, considering the fact that you too could be hurt like they do.
@bjcyrix (6910)
• Philippines
17 Oct 10
I had a lot of those when I was a kid. Every move I make was a failure or was just not good enough. It used to hurt a lot and so over the years, Ive learned to just shut it out. It got to a point that I just got tired of caring anymore that I just became numb. With that I guess I became more of an intellectual. Without the contraptions of emotions regarding people's opposing opinions, I learned to look at them with logic. Id ask myself why would someone say that to me? How can I use that remark to make something better? Different opinions should always be welcome. It gives us room for improvement. Negative ones are just a test of how long can we survive. It's just up to us on how we could handle them. That's just what I think anyways.^_^
@Downwindz (2230)
• Netherlands
27 Sep 10
Hello torchablazed I believe it is also a matter of the individual person, In my case I would improve if the negative cristism was constructive, so I was told a way out of many on how to improve it :) Or told why I got the negativ critics...
@pinoycity (578)
• Philippines
26 Sep 10
That's an inspiring story torch. For me, any criticism (or compliment) can become useful to anyone depending n how they handle it. Most criticisms that will be thrown to you will "destructive" criticisms. These can be good to you if you will allow yourself to inspired by these criticisms, instead of being taken down.
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
25 Sep 10
It would not work for me. When someone scolded me or said that I was a stupid so and so that no one would love me, that I was a failure, I just gave up. And it took years for me to get over it. Also it might make it hard for you to try especially if the negative criticism is about a character flaw that you may or may not have and am in danger of developing. For instance my mother told me "she has to learn things the hard way," and I had to, but not because of I already had it in me. It was because she instilled that character flaw in me. In order to be better motivated you have to be a strong enough character to believe that is not so. When I was young, I believed that I was that bad character.
@ANTIQUELADY (36488)
• United States
25 Sep 10
i DO TRY TO ENCOURAGE people but i wouldn't say something to them like your aunt did to u. That really wasn't very nice. I'm glad u showed her how well u could do, tho.
@aarpees (149)
25 Sep 10
Yes, for me it creates motivation to a person when they are criticized negatively. It differs from person to person but it sure works for me. That's why I do not feel bad when somebody tells me my shortcomings, but rather, I would feel really hyped up and motivated to do better. I do not like appraisals that much, i am more into having received criticisms, it makes me want to prove that I can become better and better.
@misalax (307)
• Ireland
25 Sep 10
Well, it depends on how heavy you criticize the person. Yes it can motivate them into changing for the better, but you know, if you overdo it or express it in a really insulting way, it will just put the person plainly down and may even not continue doing certain activities in fear of being criticized like that again. I've learned from my experiences.
@SimpleBB (1332)
• Philippines
25 Sep 10
Hi torchablazed, You're probably right that it is her way of motivating you and she did it right for you. But somehow, it depends on people who will you apply such motivation, for as you said, for some it will pull them down or make them have a low self esteem. So I think, before applying motivational act to someone, we should analyze first how this person might take it. If she is really that weak, probably she will take it destructively, but if say, a tough person type may take it constructively just like what was happened to you. You took it as a challenge, so definitely it fits your character. For me, I always want to take criticism in positive way for I believe that it would be for my own good. So in giving a criticism, be it for motivation purpose, we should have to analyze the person. Thanks.
@kjones505 (273)
• United States
25 Sep 10
Everybody is different. Some people improve with negative criticism and some get worse. Negative criticism can be enough for some people to give up. Those who do not respond too well to encouragement probably do need negative criticism though. I don't respond to encouragement at all. Negative criticism is what helps me.
@kiddrow (32)
• Canada
25 Sep 10
sometimes negative criticism is not not it is much better if will gonna compliments here
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
25 Sep 10
Those interested in the game of cricket know this occasion very well: "It was T-20 World Cup match of India and England. Some English player criticised Yuvrajsing (Indian Player). He took it positively and concentrated even better on his batting abilities and in the next over only, he hit six sixes....! It was a miracle.... caused due to criticism." However, for me if the criticism comes from my own persons like family members or from friends, I get upset and cannot bear it. I do not feel motivated buy my moral goes down. I know that it is not good thing for me but it is my nature.